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Temeraire
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22 Apr 2018, 1:18 pm

Raleigh wrote:
I had a garden dream, lol.
I ripped up my entire lawn and made a cottage garden with winding paths and trees with purple flowers, which I can't think of the name of right now but in my dream I knew the name of everything.
The back yard became a rainforest and orchard with a rustic shelter and a fireplace.
The middle ground was all vegetables, and berries.
It was like the garden of Eden.


This reminds me of a pic that Fluffy posted in another thread.
Also, how I would like my garden to be.

I do have lawn but also a few trees and plenty of flowers.
My little berry and veg patch is also in the middle between a shed and greenhouse.

I know the names of most things but not always able to access my memory for them. Ha.



SaveFerris
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22 Apr 2018, 1:35 pm

Temeraire wrote:

I know the names of most things but not always able to access my memory for them. Ha.


After every breakdown I've had my ability to access words in my memory diminished , it's like they were completely wiped from brain like a type of aphasia? I'm not sure if my full vocab will ever return.


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Temeraire
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22 Apr 2018, 2:04 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
Temeraire wrote:

I know the names of most things but not always able to access my memory for them. Ha.


After every breakdown I've had my ability to access words in my memory diminished , it's like they were completely wiped from brain like a type of aphasia? I'm not sure if my full vocab will ever return.


I do wonder if I have done any damage every time I have had a big burnout or breakdown. It's as if those words are hiding just in case I try to overuse them.

I do have my moments when I feel like I am getting there then I go backwards.

Add a few health issues to it and it becomes less of a worry.

Do you think that our brain is working so hard just to survive that it considers memory somewhat a luxury?



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22 Apr 2018, 2:32 pm

Temeraire wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
Temeraire wrote:

I know the names of most things but not always able to access my memory for them. Ha.


After every breakdown I've had my ability to access words in my memory diminished , it's like they were completely wiped from brain like a type of aphasia? I'm not sure if my full vocab will ever return.


I do wonder if I have done any damage every time I have had a big burnout or breakdown. It's as if those words are hiding just in case I try to overuse them.

I do have my moments when I feel like I am getting there then I go backwards.

Add a few health issues to it and it becomes less of a worry.

Do you think that our brain is working so hard just to survive that it considers memory somewhat a luxury?


I definitely feel like my brain is running in safe mode most of the time - just the bare essentials. And if my brain thinks memory is a luxury I wish it wouldn't remember complete and utter trivial shite ( that impresses some people ) and forget things that make you feel like a complete idiot when you try to retrieve it.


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Kuraudo7777
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22 Apr 2018, 2:44 pm

I have returned.

I now have five more books planned for this year.


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22 Apr 2018, 2:50 pm

Raleigh wrote:
This one reminds me of the forestry, where the wind swishes through the pine needles; one of my favourite places in the universe. :heart:

Image


Thank you. I also like going through the forest.


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DataB4
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22 Apr 2018, 7:03 pm

blooiejagwa wrote:
I made a video trying to explain thought records but as usual I rambled unnecessarily. The gist is that they help to unravel difficult thinking patterns .


You don’t need to pay a therapist to try it out. At least for most things.

The therapist is just good for guidance and outsiders perspective ... from an educated trained person

https://youtu.be/Fo8w3H5oTy4


I googled that technique. I've done a lot of writing out my thoughts and describing my feelings lately, but I haven't tried that formalized approach. You speak well on camera.

Just thought I'd pop in to say hello. I haven't been following these threads but I scanned through some pages to see what people have been up to.

Is Raleigh on another adventure?

Temeraire, I enjoy reading your encouraging words.

Kuraudo, it's amazing to me, how much you write and how many ideas you have. I like reading about them. Oh, and did you finish Doctor Who Season 10 yet?

I'm doing OK, more or less. Too much anxiety though. I've been busy working, meeting new people, reading and catching up on TV series, getting sick yet again, attending a business conference, writing, stuff. :) I've also had a couple of friends going through tough times, and there's only so much tough s**t I can take. For my own mental wellbeing, I've felt it's important for me not to be so active on these threads. I've thought of this thread a lot in particular, and obsessed about what to say after being away for a while though. I'm sure some of you know that feeling.



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22 Apr 2018, 7:17 pm

Hooray, you're back!

I am all caught up with Doctor Who, finally. I enjoyed the Christmas episode very much.


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


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22 Apr 2018, 7:37 pm

I'm sort of back. I don't intend to be an addict again but I wanted to see how people were doing.

I'm looking forward to next season with the new Doctor. The story ark with Bill and Heather was awesome though, as was the new stuff about the Master. Hmm, how's that for not spoiling things for anyone? :)



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22 Apr 2018, 7:38 pm

Apparently there's going to be three companions! I think the last time that happened was during Tom Baker's era. :o


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"A memory is something that has to be consciously recalled, right? But it's different from a memory locked deep within your heart. Words aren't the only way to tell someone how you feel...As long as I'm with you, as long as you're by my side, I won't give up even if I'm scared." Tifa Lockheart, Final Fantasy VII


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22 Apr 2018, 8:23 pm

One of my detractors is making things so unbearable here I may actually have to leave this place once again. :( I am just so sick of being told I am "messed up" and need to shut myself away until I am deemed "acceptable". I've reported his posts but the mods aren't doing anything about it.



Last edited by Marknis on 22 Apr 2018, 8:26 pm, edited 2 times in total.

cathylynn
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22 Apr 2018, 8:24 pm

Raleigh wrote:
I had a garden dream, lol.
I ripped up my entire lawn and made a cottage garden with winding paths and trees with purple flowers, which I can't think of the name of right now but in my dream I knew the name of everything.
The back yard became a rainforest and orchard with a rustic shelter and a fireplace.
The middle ground was all vegetables, and berries.
It was like the garden of Eden.


what a lovely dream and what a wonderful comment on your inner life!



cathylynn
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22 Apr 2018, 8:27 pm

Marknis wrote:
One of my detractors is making things so unbearable here I may actually have to leave this place once again. :( I am just so sick of being told I am "messed up" and need to shut myself away until I am deemed "acceptable". I've reported his posts but the mods aren't doing anything about it.


so sorry to hear that, m.



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22 Apr 2018, 8:33 pm

cathylynn wrote:
Marknis wrote:
One of my detractors is making things so unbearable here I may actually have to leave this place once again. :( I am just so sick of being told I am "messed up" and need to shut myself away until I am deemed "acceptable". I've reported his posts but the mods aren't doing anything about it.


so sorry to hear that, m.


Thanks. I've been bullied all my life and it feels like I am going to get trampled underfoot instead of getting back at those who hurt me. :(

I still can't channel any of my mental energy into drawing, music, or writing. I hate myself and wish I was stillborn as I was supposed to be instead of the doctors saving me.



cathylynn
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22 Apr 2018, 8:58 pm

Marknis wrote:
cathylynn wrote:
Marknis wrote:
One of my detractors is making things so unbearable here I may actually have to leave this place once again. :( I am just so sick of being told I am "messed up" and need to shut myself away until I am deemed "acceptable". I've reported his posts but the mods aren't doing anything about it.


so sorry to hear that, m.


Thanks. I've been bullied all my life and it feels like I am going to get trampled underfoot instead of getting back at those who hurt me. :(

I still can't channel any of my mental energy into drawing, music, or writing. I hate myself and wish I was stillborn as I was supposed to be instead of the doctors saving me.

the best revenge is living well. ( i learned that in recovering from an abusive fiance.) is there something nice you can do for yourself?



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22 Apr 2018, 9:45 pm

Things got really bad for me on WP a month ago, but I stayed. Things are getting better.


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