Bit disappointed about my first time

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I'm pretty new to sex and lost my v-card recently. I know it's important not to get your expectations up too much the first time, but I was kinda disappointed that I couldn't feel good but my partner could very quickly. I know this is really common, but I have it in my head that this is going to be what sex is like for the rest of my life and it makes me feel sad and alone. I'm overreacting, right? I just don't want to be that statistic where it's really hard to feel good with my partner regularly I can't seem to shake this feeling at all. I told myself not to get my expectations up, and yet I'm still feeling emotional about it....

Yes, please reset your expectations. I also thought it was going to "just" be great. I still am a little embarrassed that it has to be "figured out". I have a friend who is hyposensitive and I am hypersensitive --- perhaps you relate. In any case, for us it's an effort to figure out what's "just right". I choose to make that effort and she (at this time) chooses not to. I find that just like our bodies, the experience of sex changes over the years also. Given I am hypersensitive, where I am in my cycle, what's going on for me in my day play into individual experiences. I've had bad times, REALLY good times and okay times.... and expect that to continue for many more decades and am A-OK with that.

Hang in there!

I'll start with the disclaimer that I relate to the description of being demisexual.

I found the act to be disappointing in general until I figured out what my body liked and then why it responded in certain situations and not in others.

A partner who is patient and willing to focus on me until we both are in sync has been key to enjoying sexual intimacy.

Don't worry, I didn't enjoy sex at first. As I got older and more experienced and confident, I became less self-conscious and started to have fun.
I had mediocre sex during 28 years of a monogomous marriage, and only discovered awesome sex at the age of sixty. Why sixty? That was the age that I finally felt that I deserved to receive pleasure as well as taking care of everyone elses needs. I also was lucky enough to be around at a time when younger men enjoy being with older ladies, men today invest much more into pleasuring their ladies than my generation did.

Learn what you love, and what you don't, feel comfortable in your own skin, men love naked ladies and don't notice our flaws as much as we think they will. A confident lady is a sexy lady. Have lots of fun it will get sooo much better.

@Teach51, ooooooh, I have it in mind that that is possible for me! So good to read it was so for somebody else. Thank you!

I'm not quite there yet (late 40s, awaiting diagnosis -or not), but that seems like what I might write in the future.... I hope so. And my partner is a bit clueless (like me) but thankfully committed (like me).

@lionheartedgirl96, thanks for the post --- I get inspiration also.

SharonB that's my girl!! !

I'm a man....and maybe it's not my place to post. But I identify with you.

I'm sorry your "first time" wasn't all that great.

Mine wasn't, either. Anticlimactic.

Just keep up the lionhearted spirit----and you will find a person whom you feel compatible with, and who sees to your specific needs.

It will get better. Trust me.

Very punny.

Yeah you need a little expectation reset. As women we kind of have to learn to feel good a lot I think. It can take some adjusting to not only relax, and get use to the new sensations but let go of being self conscious about might look or sound and just enjoy. There's also experimentation to do to find out just what feels good for you. My first time wasn't anything "to write home about"; I was really focused on trying to relax to reduce the likelihood of it hurting. So after it was "done" I was just like "okay, I want to try that again" lol I think that is kind of the additude is best around sex. Didn't go as planned, or wasn't that great? Try again! That's part of what makes it fun isn't it?