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cazzie2010
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22 Oct 2010, 11:58 am

hi all,
do you or every got upset when you phone somebody or phone somebody back or if they just put the phone down for no reason, it make me so anxiety, and Emotional,
why i just cannot see why this is and even somebody tone of vocie can do it too :cry: :cry:
anybody also like this?
thanks
cazzie



the_curmudge
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22 Oct 2010, 12:47 pm

I hate to use the phone and can spend all day planning a phone call, then decide it's too late and resolve to call tomorrow, only to go through the same process again the next day. I seldom answer a ringing phone, preferring to pick up in the middle of the message if it turns out to be someone I really want to talk to. I can remember feeling emotionally drained and disappointed in myself after talking on the phone, but that's something that's improved with time.

I attribute my phone phobia to basic shyness coupled with the fact callers often attributed the wrong age and gender to me in my teenage years. I don't worry much about the emotonal state of people I'm talking to; if they sound annoyed or displeased for no obvious reason, I just figure they've picked up at an inconvenient time for them, and I let them go.



Bubbles137
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22 Oct 2010, 12:55 pm

I hate speaking on the phone- every time I have to call someone, I get really panicky and nervous. It's not so bad when someone calls me, but I still don't like it coz I never know when to speak and interrupt people by mistake, and it makes me nervous. It's OK with one particular friend (I'm not sure why!), but I still get scared calling her in case she's busy/doesn't want to talk or someone else answers the phone. I prefer any other way of contact!



Cicely
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22 Oct 2010, 1:05 pm

I've always hated talking on the phone, so I don't unless I absolutely have to. I've been known to ignore phone calls from people. Fortunately I can use email or talk in person for most things. It's really awkward, though, when somebody calls me just to chat, and I have to ask them not to do that.

Part of my phone anxiety is just an extension of my social anxiety. It's conversation, which is stressful. But talking on the phone is usually more stressful than talking to someone face-to-face, and there are several different reasons for that. One is that for years, when I've answered the phone at home, people assume that I'm my mom or sister and launch into conversation. I know that's their bad phone etiquette and not mine, but it's an uncomfortable situation nonetheless. Another reason is that my phone conversations tend to involve awkward silences, miscommunications, and accidental interruptions. The third main reason is that it's disconcerting for me to speak with someone without being able to see them. I'm naturally inclined to look at the source of a sound, and not being able to do that is weird for me.



Philologos
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22 Oct 2010, 1:35 pm

There are exactly four people I might choose to call voluntarily. Others I call only with fear and trembling. Picking up the phone is nerve rattling.



MizLiz
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22 Oct 2010, 2:30 pm

What I really hate is playing "phone tag". You call someone and leave an awkward message.... because they called you and left a message. Then they don't f*****g call back.


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industrialx
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22 Oct 2010, 2:45 pm

the_curmudge wrote:
I hate to use the phone and can spend all day planning a phone call, then decide it's too late and resolve to call tomorrow, only to go through the same process again the next day. I seldom answer a ringing phone, preferring to pick up in the middle of the message if it turns out to be someone I really want to talk to. I can remember feeling emotionally drained and disappointed in myself after talking on the phone, but that's something that's improved with time.

I attribute my phone phobia to basic shyness coupled with the fact callers often attributed the wrong age and gender to me in my teenage years. I don't worry much about the emotonal state of people I'm talking to; if they sound annoyed or displeased for no obvious reason, I just figure they've picked up at an inconvenient time for them, and I let them go.


I hate having to use the phone, and it's made even worse by the fact that I often have to phone my boss to moan and b***h about the hours she's given me because she never listens to a word the employees say. I have to spend time planning what I'm going to say, and by the time the call is made, I'm pretty edgy.


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ninszot
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22 Oct 2010, 11:22 pm

I hate the sudden ringing - it is starteling and often by the time I have collected myself and gonne to the phone checked the calll display and decided to talk to the person, they have left a message already. Call display helps though - before I never answered the phone, only returned messages. I have the same problem with doorbells only worse - if I am not expecting someone to the door I may simply hide and not answer or peek out the window when they are leaving. I wish I could get an assistance dog to give me more warning when someone is coming to the door. (I used to watch my dog's ears move like little sonar - when I had my dog, I always knew if someone was on the property)



cazzie2010
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23 Oct 2010, 2:10 pm

[quote="MizLiz"]What I really hate is playing "phone tag". You call someone and leave an awkward message.... because they called you and left a message. Then they don't f***ing call back.[/quote

i hate that too, :roll:



FluffyDog
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23 Oct 2010, 2:36 pm

I agree that it is very annoying to talk to somebody whithout being able to see them. I'm not all that good at interpreting faces but somehow watching somebody's lips move makes it easier for me to understand what they are saying.

It's even worse if I don't know the person personally who is on the phone. That makes it even more difficult to figure out whether they might be joking or not.

And I also know the problem of being mistaken for my mother or sister. I always find it difficult to explain to people why my family is not at home at the moment, even though I know it isn't my fault.

To make matters even worse, my father is selfemployed and he gets quite a number of phonecalls from customers and/or business partners every day. Whenever I have to pick up the phone and talk to them, I am so afraid of saying something wrong and upsetting them so they won't be doing business with my father anymore. :(
Even if it turns out not to be one of my father's business contacts, the uncertainty of whether or not it is a business-related call is grating on my nerves whenever the number is not displayed by the phone. (We only have one phone number for both business and private calls.)

So yes, I tend to let other members of my familiy pick uo the phone and I spend a lot of time fretting before I make an unavoidable phone call. I just plain dislike telephones. Even my friends I prefer to contact by email or ICQ whenever possible. Or I just write messages on my mobile rather than actually calling them.

Most of my friends (and my entire family) do not understand this dislike though and I have already had some very uneasy conversation about why I would rather not talk to someone on the phone.



jpfudgeworth
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23 Oct 2010, 2:45 pm

Ive got a real problem with answering phones. I feel so anxious and panicked that I avoid calls from people I really shouldnt ignore. I wish people could only text message me. I will talk to someone all day in writing if they want.