Parents ever threaten to call police/hospital for meltdown?

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Dts888
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19 Jan 2017, 9:25 am

Couldn't fit the whole title in subject, but basically (I hate saying it) but a week or so ago I had a full out meltdown, hitting, screaming, breaking things, etc.... During this state, and even when I was younger (like 8-12) my father would always say I need to be put in a mental institute for not acting my age and throwing "fits" all the time. Called me spoiled, called me a little sh*t, called me a brat, obviously this just added to the meltdown, but have your parents ever do this? I am not officially diagnosed because of new laws regarding the eliminantion of Asperger's syndrome. I guess I'm like too abnormal to be considered Neurotypical, but not challenged enough to give me a autism diagnosis, so my best friend (who has autism) basically said that I have it so now I just have that unofficial title, my father isn't understanding with it claiming this is a big act to get something. :cry:



iliketrees
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19 Jan 2017, 10:04 am

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I am not officially diagnosed because of new laws regarding the eliminantion of Asperger's syndrome

What laws?

If you don't mean laws but the change in diagnosis, your old diagnosis of Asperger's means you get the diagnosis of ASD. From the DSM 5:

Quote:
Individuals with a well-established DSM-IV diagnosis of autistic disorder, Asperger’s disorder, or pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified should be given the diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder



leejosepho
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19 Jan 2017, 10:22 am

Dts888 wrote:
...hitting, screaming, breaking things, etc....

...my best friend (who has autism) basically said that I have it...
...my father isn't understanding with it claiming this is a big act to get something. :cry:

My first-ever meltdown (at about age 13) was definitely a meltdown, but at the time I also knew it might help me gain something I wanted. Hitting people and destroying property are crimes, so even having an official diagnosis would not give any of us a pass for doing those kinds of things without consequence. Your father might never believe your meltdowns are not mere efforts at manipulation, but your efforts to stop or to at least better-control "hitting, screaming, breaking things, etc." will definitely be impressive. So, maybe let him know those things concern you and that you would like to possibly talk with a counselor or therapist who might be able to help.


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EzraS
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19 Jan 2017, 12:45 pm

Well I was diagnosed when I was really little, so my parents had a better idea of what they were up against and they have gotten a lot of counseling and education over the years on how to deal with me more effectively. So if possible I think some kind of counseling needs to be set up for you and your dad. Does your school have a counselor you can go to? Hang in there bro, autism is a really hard thing for people to understand.



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19 Jan 2017, 1:18 pm

All the time...and for the simplest things too.


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idonthaveanickname
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19 Jan 2017, 2:19 pm

I can relate to people in my family not understanding Asperger's or autism in general. As a matter of fact, my stepmom doesn't even believe in autism or Asperger's. I've tried to explain to her that I do have it, but she says it's bull$#!+. That made me so mad at her. Even my stepsister doesn't understand it, and I've tried to explain myself to her, too. I remember one time she yelled at me for not showing appreciation for my dad and stepmom letting me live with them for free, not having to pay rent. While I tried to tell her that it's not easy for me to naturally show appreciation, my stepmom overheard me and yelled "That's bull$#!t, Hannah!" Then she and I got into this big argument and I ended up screaming "F#ck you!" at my stepmom. So, I can understand what you're going through. Hey, I think I felt some empathy just now. I can only feel empathy for someone if I've been in the same kind of situation they have. I hope things get better for you.



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19 Jan 2017, 2:29 pm

My mom once threatened to put me in a hospital if I hit her again. That time I was trying to have ODD so I could get my way because I had found a short cut to my problems so I thought everything had to evolve around me because of my diagnoses and I couldn't understand why I was expected to suck it up and toughen up and have anxiety while other kids with AS had it easier because they got their way so they wouldn't be stressed out and have anxiety. So I thought having ODD would make my parents give into me because that is what Frankie did and his mother was his doormat so he had her under his control because she was afraid of him so I tried that. He had ODD.


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somanyspoons
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19 Jan 2017, 3:09 pm

yah. This happened to me. And for WAY less than you are describing. At least, that's the way I remember it. My parents, my mother specifically, also has a tendency to get over emotional. And a few times she threatened to call the police because I was yelling at her. I don't know what she thought the police were going to do. Arrest me for yelling? Give her parenting tips? It's hard to say.

I'm sorry this is happening to you, but it's not all that unusual. Parenting is hard, and it's pretty understandable that parents would start to feel overwhelmed and say something stupid.



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19 Jan 2017, 4:42 pm

I do remember my mother once driving by the "boys home" and threatening to have me locked up. Another time she told me she could easily sign me over to someone else to raise is she wanted to and how easy it was. I am sure she was upset but those comments HURT.



Fraser_1990
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19 Jan 2017, 4:51 pm

My mum never threatened to call the police, she actually did on a few occasions and I was arrested for "disturbing the peace". Although I never felt that there was much peace there to disturb.


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19 Jan 2017, 6:55 pm

My mom used to threaten to leave me at places and threaten to dump me on the side of the road but she did the same to my brothers too. One time it backfired and I couldn't understand why it made her so angry.


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Fraser_1990
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19 Jan 2017, 7:08 pm

One of my personal favourites was the "jaggy jumper" home. :lol:


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21 Jun 2018, 10:10 am

All the time


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LoneLoyalWolf
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21 Jun 2018, 1:40 pm

Awful that your father is like this. He does have power over you so be careful. A mental hospital is a horrible place.

Try to keep it in and not act out, find something to vent.

Wish you the best and hope you get through this.

Good luck!


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kraftiekortie
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21 Jun 2018, 1:49 pm

I used to get threats to be sent to a group home all the time.

One time, I even had an interview for a group home.

Additionally, I was threatened with being declared a "PINS" child--meaning "Person In Need of Supervision" in New York State.



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22 Jun 2018, 12:51 pm

I was born with lots of mental & physical disabilities besides autism that my parents did NOT understand & weren't even fully aware of some of em. They've been very critical of my faults, issues, & quirks till I moved out. We had LOTS of fights due to this which triggered bad meltdowns for me. I was NEVER violent but I would yell/scream & curse them out. Mom would get p!ssed & say how she must of brought the wrong child home from the hospitable & threatened to have me arrested, sent to juvi, sent to military skewl, put up for adoption or just to kick me out of the house. After I graduated high-skewl she quit threatening to send me to military skewl & put me up for adoption but she still threatened to call the cops & have me arrested or just to throw me out on the streets. I lived with my parents till I moved in with my girlfriend at 30 due to no other options. Being disabled & only receiving SSI or little more than that when I was on SSDI & no other benefits besides the state Medicaid which NO docs in my area would accept so I had to pay for private health insurance that had deductibles & copays & didn't cover mental. Mom griped about how I wasn't contributing to the household when I wasn't working but my medical care cost me most of my SSI/SSDI checks & I was paying for my phone service & our cable/net bill. I did pay my parents about half my checks when I was working & they were off my back more but they still b!tched about things. I was working low wage jobs so I couldn't afford to get my own place & I couldn't drive & needed transportation in an area with no real public transportation option so I had no choice but to live with my parents. When I was in-between jobs & before I started working & after I quit working, I was putting in apps at most any place I thought my parents might be able to bring me to & from & thought they'd might have a job I could do but had little luck & was unemployed aLOT more than I was employed. I was accused of being too lazy & selffish to get a job because I wanted to be dependent on my parents forever. Mom used to joke about how she'd have to have me euthanized when she'd die.


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