When people say ‘here if you need to talk about it’

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I'm with you on this one.

I don't know if it's an autistic thing or if it's just me, but 'I'm here if you need to talk about it' has always sounded to me like 'You should be talking about it - it's what normal people do.' Of course, almost nobody actually ever means it that way.

I'm much more comfortable with 'I'm here if you need anything.' Trying to put myself into the mind of a neurotypical for a moment, it may be that they don't like saying that in case the person asks for something that they're not able or willing to give.

What I want to say to you is: 'You are not alone.'

^
Maybe sometimes it's meant like that. But I think there are times when it just means what it says, and that it can be sincere reassurance that you're welcome to lean on them.

I guess they are offering free emotional support, to a limited degree depending on the relationship.
Sometimes it means they cut you off and hug you then leave, other times they listen for a bit and offer basic problem solving and empathy.

In general for me I do talk through things, but honestly it usually doesn't help much and I like practical solutions.

It is vaguely triggering because people are very hypocritical and it can be a selfish thing to say, eg they would
immediately go behind your back to gossip about you after saying it.