AS-dar... autism radar?

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I can usually tell if someone else is on the spectrum if that's what you mean

Yeah. That's pretty much all that "a-dar" means. And I usually turn out to be right when I suspect that someone is on the spectrum.

How do you find out?  Do you walk up and ask them, or do you wait for them to volunteer the information?

I worked with person A for years. Suspected that they were aspie. And then I and a supervisor got to gossiping on a break. And she told me that (a) she was a psych major who also suspected that person A was aspie, and (B) later she had to sign paper work for him to get off work to go to a shrink because..he was being treated for aspergers.

That sorta thing has happened more than once.

Wish I where wrong on this thing . Am recently realizing a person thought was a friend , younger, whom seemed to have very Aspie type life and interactions , and other features , seems to be afraid to help me. With weirdly enough her NT grandmother , whom her own father had to get a restraining order against ,to protect her , (my younger friend) from influences by this same grandmother whom is abusing me as a neighbour, using other more gullible relatives and a ex-con and his friends to destroy my property and verbally abuse me. Police have not been able to catch him in the act.

I picked "maybe". Sometimes I see people that might be, but without asking them it would be impossible to know for sure. And it's not the sort of thing I would just ask about.

Real talk.

I've never detected anyone that was good at masking.

If I'm autistic then I am good at masking. The second doctor I said something about autism to said "If you are then you're highly functioning". I said "definitely".

I'm not sure what to make of that comment. No duh I'm highly functioning, that's obvious. I should probably not dwell on it.

Happy 2020

was pretty much blind to seeing aspies ,not being aware of differences to observe,just seeing people chractereistics were only that. Not knowing to typify ,only seeing if person was not mean . Guile deciet were not in my actual understandings . More pain hurt no pain no hurt .. Took all words at face value. still to this day. Am learning that reacting to victimization has its price. Even if attempting to engage help from legal authorities . Never anticipated these things. Am fearing naivete, has bern will be my undoing . So knowing to look for differences is a newer thing to me . But in the context of A dar vs Gay dar . Gave me a incredible insight as to things was plainly not observing.. Had seen gay dar as obvious though. beauty is in the eyes of the beholden .

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". Not the "beholden". That's how the adage goes.

Also...I don't know what "beauty" and sexual orientation have to do with each other, nor what autistic vs NT has to do with it either.

But it sounds like you're extremely preoccupied with this issue with your neighbor. The issue only tangentily relates to the subject of the thread, but the thread triggers you in talking about this neighbor issue ( I, and anyone might start running mouth about something weighing on me). Maybe you could start a separate thread about this conflict with this person.

pareidolia is an excellent word and concept that people should know.

agrees on the neighbor issue , just thoughts some random idea would help give me insight ..sorry...
but on the quote beauty in the eye of the beholder WAS ! ,INTENTIONALLY MISQUOTED, it sufficed to change the concept of the quote . once in a while people can be beholden to others, and if it is a favourable relationship . One individual might call it a thing of beauty . Then you disallow for beauty in sexual orientation . Or in Aspies .?
Have you not seen things of beauty in all variants of humaness ,? well i have.
beauty can apply to anything , am suspicious that this is true . a simple dandelion (common weed) , to a Van Gogh . Am sorry on this misquote,
Without explanation . am prone to abuse the language to suit myself.

The unspoken , mere recognition of another aspie , whom, for that mere moment in time , realises he is not alone . A younger man clearly seeing that , he was being recognized without any negative judgement in a very casual interaction . In a environment that was not crowded but also obvious a business service based situation , Also allow me to be myself also and not be judged . It was,all very subtle but very clearly acknowledgement. smiles all around by the time the transaction finished . he was not particularily good at masking , pretty sure he was aware of that. And nowadays , for myself , am less likely to care. That moment in time all by itself was a thing of beauty to me.

It is an excellent word, but it doesn't have much to do the topic we're discussing. Wishful thinking doesn't have much to do with it either. Except in a different context that were aren't talking about

Pareidolia means seeing a human face out of random dots (like connecting the dots on the moon to see a face).
In the real world humans have no choice but to make snap judgements based upon incomplete data to survive.

Female characters on sitcoms would talk about "the failure of my gaydar" when they were disappointed that the date of their dreams was gay. So if anything were talking about reverse wishful thinking.


We are talking about the real world where you cant hire a panel of scientists to peer review every thought that goes through your head about everything you think about all day. You have to type folks around you, and do so via snap judgments. You do get a vibe from a person. As long as you don't bet the rent money on your hunch and take your own conclusions too seriously there is nothing wrong with it. Its what humans have to do to survive by figuring out the motives of others in primate troop.

Okay. After you explain it all it kinda makes sense.

If you recognize a fellow fill-in-the-blank person (aspie, gay, fan of the Chicago Cubs, gun nut, Hasidic Jew, or whatever narrow subgroup of humanity you belong to that you rarely see another member of) it can be a "beautiful moment" when you and the said person recognize each other as members of that small splinter group.

Had a moment like that with a young lady on (crazy as this sounds) on a phone sex site. After conversing with her more than once I finally acted on my suspicion and asked her are..you...an aspie?f. At first she was downcast because "I thought I was good at masking it", but then she got animated when she realized I was one as well and we had a fun (non dirty) conversation.

But I am talking about folks you work with whom you don't have any vested interest in them being gay, or being autistic, but you may get some sense from working around them that they might be that.





But I am talking about like someone I work with I have no vested interest in them being gay (am not gay, am not homophobic, but am not one of these folks who WANT Abraham Lincoln to be gay say). Just a guy who I sorta get that vibe from, and over the years little things about him seem to confirm that. But who knows? He might be, or he might not be. Nothing either beautiful, nor otherwise about it. Lol!

Today I went to the psychiatrist and this girl came in that kind of set off some bells for me so I swallowed my fear and made an ass of myself and asked her if she was autistic. She said no.

This data is not valid for scientific purposes because I didn't get a background on her after the question. She could have it and not know or it could be pareidolia.

I think you are taking Pareidolia at fAcE value. Faces are just the most common because of the evolutions.

"Pareidolia is the tendency for incorrect perception of a stimulus as an object, pattern or meaning known to the observer, such as seeing shapes in clouds, seeing faces in inanimate objects or abstract patterns, or hearing hidden messages in music. "

I can pick some subtypes pretty with some reliability