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bumble
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06 Dec 2011, 11:26 pm

Does anyone know any good books from which I can learn how to socialise?

Ie How to approach someone to start a conversation, Examples of small talk that I can write down and take with me, how to develop a friendship (ie how to move a casual conversation on to a possible friendship or how and when to know to ask them if they would like to go for a coffee or something...People keep saying ask people for coffee but how do you know when its appropriate to ask it?)

I do not think my therapists are going to help as, as with many people, they insist that if i relax this stuff will come to me naturally. It does not and they won't listen so I need to teach myself. There must be some books out there with instructions?



cathylynn
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06 Dec 2011, 11:44 pm

the fine art of small talk by debra fine. has loads of examples you can write on an index card and keep handy.



MountainLaurel
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07 Dec 2011, 12:41 am

Quote:
People keep saying ask people for coffee but how do you know when its appropriate to ask it?


I usually wait until I've had many conversations with the person and I really enjoy our conversations. I go on the assumption that if I really enjoy the other woman, that she most likely experiences our conversations similarly. It's unlikely that enjoyable conversations could be had unless both parties enjoy them.