books

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Does anyone know any good books from which I can learn how to socialise?

Ie How to approach someone to start a conversation, Examples of small talk that I can write down and take with me, how to develop a friendship (ie how to move a casual conversation on to a possible friendship or how and when to know to ask them if they would like to go for a coffee or something...People keep saying ask people for coffee but how do you know when its appropriate to ask it?)

I do not think my therapists are going to help as, as with many people, they insist that if i relax this stuff will come to me naturally. It does not and they won't listen so I need to teach myself. There must be some books out there with instructions?

the fine art of small talk by debra fine. has loads of examples you can write on an index card and keep handy.

I usually wait until I've had many conversations with the person and I really enjoy our conversations. I go on the assumption that if I really enjoy the other woman, that she most likely experiences our conversations similarly. It's unlikely that enjoyable conversations could be had unless both parties enjoy them.