Page 1 of 1 [ 7 posts ] 

pat2rome
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Jun 2009
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,819
Location: Georgia

15 Dec 2011, 7:40 am

This spring, I decided to start memorizing body language signals and other nonverbal cues and their meanings; I've since made considerable progress, and now I can process the information quickly enough to analyze the cues while I'm holding a conversation with the person (instead of going over them in my head after the fact). Now that I register these cues, I'm starting to pick up subtle differences of signals with different situations and people, and my brain is able to pick out patterns and derive the meaning from that.

Recently I've been noticing attraction signals from a very attractive girl in one of my classes, and I decided to try my hand at mirroring those signals to convey that I am also interested in her. Well, a week ago, she gave me her number without me even having to ask for it. :) So it turns out that despite the subtleties of the signals involved, I both correctly interpreted the message and conveyed it back to her.

Teaching myself body language has been a great success so far, and it really does wonders for my confidence every time I interpret cues correctly.


_________________
I'm never gonna dance again, Aspie feet have got no rhythm.


OJani
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2011
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,505
Location: Hungary

15 Dec 2011, 8:55 am

Congrats! What source of information did you use to memorize them? Could you post links or recommend books? Thanks.


_________________
Another non-English speaking - DX'd at age 38
"Aut viam inveniam aut faciam." (Hannibal) - Latin for "I'll either find a way or make one."


pat2rome
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Jun 2009
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,819
Location: Georgia

15 Dec 2011, 8:59 am

OJani wrote:
Congrats! What source of information did you use to memorize them? Could you post links or recommend books? Thanks.

Sure, don't know why I didn't think to do that! And thanks for the congrats :)

http://westsidetoastmasters.com/resourc ... e/toc.html

This is a business-oriented overview of body language, with good descriptions of general concepts and signals.

http://changingminds.org/techniques/bod ... nguage.htm

This has an extensive list of specific signals, with good explanations of the differences. Also has numerous reminders about the most important part: context is everything!


_________________
I'm never gonna dance again, Aspie feet have got no rhythm.


mar00
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2011
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 603
Location: Germany

15 Dec 2011, 10:11 am

Oh I am so clueless in this and never force myself to actualy cram it. Thanks ;)
I am sure it's a must in job interviews..



OJani
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2011
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,505
Location: Hungary

15 Dec 2011, 12:44 pm

It's a bit tough to me, too... I'll look into it, though, especially Romantic body language.


_________________
Another non-English speaking - DX'd at age 38
"Aut viam inveniam aut faciam." (Hannibal) - Latin for "I'll either find a way or make one."


smudge
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Sep 2006
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,716
Location: Moved on

15 Dec 2011, 1:22 pm

Yes, I'd highly recommend it. Reading about body language has been absolutely essential in making me approachable to people, and recognising when to back off or change the topic if I need to. I can also recognise when someone's attracted to me or dislikes me. I was completely clueless before I read about it. My problem now is just conversation...but it's still a big thing.



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

15 Dec 2011, 1:23 pm

:cheers: that's great!

i studied a body language book and it helped me in a meeting with my boss, when i could see that he was getting personally distressed about something - it put everything in perspective and helped me to know what to say next.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105