Empathy test - weird questions

Post Reply New Topic

Your score: 12
0 - 32 = low (most people with Asperger Syndrome or high-functioning autism score about 20)
33 - 52 = average (most women score about 47 and most men score about 42)
53 - 63 is above average
64 - 80 is very high
80 is maximum


I thought I was a bit more empathic than that but... apparently no

I scored 23, better than I thought I would, but still close enough to autism to prevent my suspicions from arising. Some of the questions I had trouble answering because they were rather vague, for instance, the one about feeling upset when seeing people cry, I couldn't tell if it meant upset in general as in anxious and uncomfortable (yes) or if it meant mirroring the other person's feelings and feeling upset as in sad or depressed (no) so I went with the second one.

Took it, scored 17.

I got a 3... by definition, I can't tell how any of you feel about my score...

oy...I scored an 18...I thought I was a very empathetic person too...I wonder what the hot questions are? People do come up and talk to me, and they say nice things.

Oddly enough, I was one of the staff aides at the school where I worked known to have a good rapport with kids who had a diagnosis on the spectrum or other issues. These kids would often voluntarily come and talk to me at recess or lunch...without being coached. We had one kid who was fairly deep on the AS spectrum when he started at our school, and I was one of his first 'safe' people...One whom he would seek out and say hello to when he finally began to communicate. And when he began to be social, he would run up to me and say Hi! Mrs. M...he didn't look at me directly, but I didn't care, I would brightly reply Hi! S...how are you doing today?..and he would tell me something interesting he was up to...Then again, I was one of the least demanding of the grownups...I never asked him to look at me and we would have conversations while we both looked elsewhere, or just sit in a companionable manner at the sandbox saying nothing, sifting sand until the bell rang and he would run to the steps to go back to class. His aide of the time did not think these were particularly strong moments in his therapeutic treatment. She would regularly be put under instructions to have him socialize with his classmates or play games...I once told her it was recess and that none of the other kids had assignments then, so he should have some time off as well - and if sifting sand was calming and made him ready for class. So what?!

I always thought I was empathetic...are these tests accurate?

I scored 22. Some of the questions were ones where I oscillated between "slightly agree" and "slightly disagree", and probably would've chosen an in-between option had it existed.

A big fat five for me.

Wow, 45? I know something's wrong here. Okay, maybe it's high for someone with Asperger's Syndrome but every other test I've taken online about EQ suggests that mine is at least in the 60s (61 the last time). Still, this is the lowest EQ score I've actually ever received. o_o

No wait, it ended up being 54 after a few tweaks and actually reading the questions. That chart really did a beating to my eyes though, ouch! >.<

Slightly above average it seems, still lower than what I usually get on EQ tests but nevertheless, it's closer than a 42 (though one time I did get a 72 for Empathy and a 64 for EQ according to my signature).

*Oops, sorry for double posting.

Thanks Fish Stick Nick...It's funny, one can enter the seventh decade of life and only then discover that what they thought was empathy might really be something else.

It's true, I don't actually 'feel' what others are expressing, but I'm pretty good at assessing the situation and responding in a way that everyone finds acceptable, comforting, happy etc. When I was a child though, I was terrible at this - it's a skill I've learned over time. Is typical empathy is an automatic response? I though it was something one learned while growing up, and that the terrible cruelty and bullying some people exhibit is just their lack of this skill. Does this mean that the revolting behavior some folks show is because they are actually empathetically relating to the AS person's 'lack of empathy'?
I'm a bit confused here....

There is one social and personal advantage though to being a delayed responder...pure survival. When a serious crisis occurs, I'm the classic 'no drama mama'. I've seen people around me go into total freak out panic mode, and there I am, coolly handling the issues of the moment efficiently and correctly too! Then, only after things calm down and everyone is okay and safe, I'll start to emotionally process what just happened = I'll get the shakes even! They'll say things like, 'Hey, what's your problem? Everything is fine, you helped a lot' etc - etc...meanwhile I've gone from being totally in control of my emotions into proverbial meltdown mode. However, I've seen kids on the spectrum who panic and melt down right away in a big crisis -

On the morning of 9-11, I was living in Los Angeles. Like most west coasters, I'd heard the news and gone to work anyway. By mid morning though,the real dimensions had begun to emerge and it was decided that school would be dismissed. Everyone was to report to the lunchroom with their students to wait for their rides. As an adjunct teacher, I was sort of free once everyone was settled. Most of the kids were fine, though a few of the older ones looked worried. One of the teachers, whose brother worked in the Tower Complex was a basket case, so he was sent to the teacher's lounge. The two girls whose father had had an appointment in the Twin Towers that morning (he was on his way to the Battery Park Tunnel when the first plane hit) got to go to the office...and then there were some kids on the spectrum who needed to NOT be in that big noisy room.

I didn't really want to be in the auditorium either right then, and quickly volunteered to sit in an isolated spot out on the stairs with a couple of very fragile Autistic kids, one of whom who was totally fried emotionally because she was convinced the terrorists had already gone to her house and killed her mom - vivid descriptions of the imagined event poured out of her - the other one just clung wide-eyed to my hand until his mom came to get him - I doubt listening to the older girl helped, but at least he was quiet...Even though I was also going through the crisis of not knowing what the hell was happening, I'd entered a state of total calm and was quite at ease with everyone. While most of the staff was rather upset and eager to leave, I stayed at the school until the last kid left. I was still fine when I got to Target on the way home (to pick up some batteries and other things for the emergency kit) ...it was only when I got home that it began to 'hit' me and It was months before I 'got it'...

I've been through serious earthquakes, car wrecks, having my kids break their bones or stick a screwdriver in their eye even (she was fine, entered the orbit, but missed the eyeball itself and just needed stitches)...no problem until it's all over!

Anyone else here process emotion and emergencies else like this?

I scored a 5 on this test.

I scored 11 - not very surprising, though I expected it to be slightly higher.

Some of those weird questions are 'filler questions'. They don't count in the score.

I don't remember what I scored, but I do remember being a little insulted as it was quite low and I have always viewed myself as an empathic person.

Some questions are dubious, like this one:

49. If I see a stranger in a group, I think that it is up to them to make an effort to join in.

I had to say 'strongly agree' to that one, but I think that would show up as being non-empathic. However, I don't give my answer because I don't care about that person, but because I cannot know if they want to join in or not. They may not want to, and then I shouldn't go an drag them in, now should I? That has been done to me so often, and it always made me miserable to be forced to engaged because others reckoned that I should want that. The way I see it, those people who 'made an effort' to have me join in were the unempathic ones!