It's such a relief to know it's Autism and not Bipolar etc.

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Today is Valentine's day, not only did I meet a really awesome guy who totally clicks with me to share it with, but I found out that I likely do not have bipolar, schizophrenia, or schizo-affective. I was referred to a new therapist, whose son has Aspergers and she could tell right off the bat that my issue was poor parenting, and Autism. My dad has Autism, it's very clear to me but not to him, and my mom has borderline or something else. This is something she understood and I mentioned my childhood, the non-stop talking and swinging, circular stuff, the way I talked early and my intelligence etc. that my parents never realized was Autism.

Basically everything fit Aspergers. She was really nice, and said that she would eliminate "alcohol abuse" from my chart since it was a misunderstanding, that it's a structural thing not a chemical imbalance...and she looked like she was tearing up because she understood the difficulty of my situation. Because the funny thing is I know I have Aspergers, it's just that no one else "gets it" and finally someone with compassion and high insight understands. She said they're going to change my treatment plan, diagnosis, and everything. I am so relieved that I feel elated because someone finally understands that I do not have a chemical imbalance, that this is just the way I am.

I'm a bit nervous that the psychiatrist still won't understand, but my new therapist will advocate for me and hopefully I'll finally at twenty-four get the right help and understanding of myself. I feel amazingly clear headed, she even turned off the light when I mentioned that sounds are louder to me and light is so bright it can be blinding to the point I can't focus. I also have trouble with eye contact, basically my parents didn't understand what was wrong and because of their issues they projected a worse illness on me than I had. She even for once mentioned kindly about my reactions being a little out of sync. I haven't told my dad, because he'll never realize it....he has it worse than me. He was mute as a child too, and he has a lot of the behaviors, staring off constantly, never talking, social skills he's had to work on etc. He doesn't even know he has it, but one time he mentioned out of the blue about his parents thinking he was ret*d and I realized that it all makes sense now.

This a big step toward figuring out how to move forward, because honestly it's been completely at a standstill due to the frustration of not knowing what's my actual issue, and misconceptions. Because women do adapt easier to Autism at least socially, so they thought it was schizo-affective which is a milder form or spectrum showing some "schizophrenia" and some "mood" but I don't actually get depressed, or moody, or manic. I've just had some stressful situations and was bullied all my life for being different like a tom-boy etc.

Glad to read all that, nice to see a positive story. I too recently got my diagnosis at 31, and it is nice to know that it isn't as you say "a chemical inbalance" its just me. Like you I also knew it was Aspergers in advance of the medical establishment, and like you I thought my Dad would never understand that he was too. It took a year and a half for me to get my diagnosis from when I had my first suspicions, but in that time my dad softened to the idea, and once I had the diagnosis he actually accepted him too being an aspie as "probably true".

Stand your ground with the psychiatrist!

Thank-you! I'm glad to know I'm not alone in this.

Congrats, I was just diagnosed recently at 29 (going on 30); I'm a psych grad student and the Therapist pulled out the DSM (Mental Health Bible); she went over the assessment and asked what I believed my diagnosis was; I explained Bi-polar; she almost fell off her chair and then told me Asperger's. I was freaked out initially as I did not understand the difference between Asperger's and general autism but I quickly calmed. I previously tried tons of meds for depression thinking it was a chemical imbalance but none worked because Asperger's is just a name for the brain being wired differently. Congrat's on your diagnosis and meeting someone awesome. I really enjoy your positive outlook. Definitely stand your ground with the new Psychiatrist.