Is there such thing as 'mild' Aspergers?

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Most likely I have it - I'd say certainly others do. I'm rarely on here, but did want to come back for a moment after searching "very mild Asperger's" - in fact also found an article about it. http://www.associatedcontent.com/articl ... nd_in.html

I didn't like it here because people just seemed more miserable about life and such and I'm the opposite, but that sort of ties into my traits - I don't have problems with certain patterns in my life (I have been known to deliberately break out of my patterns like takings howers at 2 PM or eat at odd times) but when thigns go against my expected pattern for *life*...that's when I used to have major problems. I have a persoanl relationship with Jesus Christ, and it's great, but while that leads me to understand all the sin in this world, I find myself having to be careful not to judge people too harshly. When someone gives the finger becasue they got cut off in traffic,, for instance, part of me wants to scream at the person giving the finger, "How do you know that personw ho cut you off isn't rushing to the hospital because they've got a dying baby or their house isn't on fire or something else horrible!"

See, I'm *overly* empathetic in that sometimes, I see all the different possibilities in a situation and it's jsut overwhelming. In fact, and I truly believe this is a gift from God, I can't bring myself to verbalize prayersor even put them into cohereent thoughts becasue the number of problems is so overwhelming. So, I will use the voice of an imaginary friend/stuffed animal and it works.

(Sorry to those who don't believe, but this is a huge part of who I am. And, I felt it the only way to really make my point. From here on you dont' have to worry.)

I'm pretty literal; I can tell a few facial expressions, especially extreme ones (Schultz seeing something he shouldn't on Hogan's Heroes, for instance, right before he murmurs "I know nothing, I see noth-ing!") But, sometimes I can't tell the extent a person is sad, happy, angry, etc. very well - I can't tell someone's intentions. And being legally blind, I can't even see their faces that well till I'm up close. I can't get many social cues, and sarcasm not at all.

So, as you can see, because my family always encouraged a lot of interaction and made sure I was only with patient people, I developed the idea that the world would be a safe place. And, I'm glad of that because while I don't have many deep friends with whom I can talk about my feelings in really meaningful ways, I do hve friends I like to hang out with and laugh with (my laugh has improved, when little I laughed a bit like Horshack on "Welcome back Kotter").

But, when i laugh, I can easily fall off a chair laughing, I get so into it. Even if I just think about it. For isntance, this one telemarketer called me once, and I started laughing like crazy at the prank I was going to pull on him even before I pulled it. (I was going to "correct" his spelling of my business' name, where he was giving this "free" website", with something like XZJGBCPZXJ AIIEOOEOEUAA. He thought becasue he had the wrong name the business was closed though so I just let him think that so they wouldn't call anymore.)

See, what I just wrote, it's also hard for me to know what information people would want (or even if theyw ant a conversation at all at times, though I'm better at that now that I'm older)

Since I empathize okay I'm good at doing wills and estate planning, but have my own office out of my home. But I can't do litigation becuase we're supposed to always be nice by my definition and there are times when litigating that people aren't.

So I make sure to avoid the really angry or scary people and I never watcht he news, getting my news from a nice Christian message board, occasional radio, and newspaper.

I'm sorry this got so long, let's see, anythign else. Oh, friend-making, people have usually had to approach me when it comes to being friends. I'd sit anywhere in high school, which made me known as the "Geek who was friends with everyone" becasue it gave the impression I *ws* friends with everyone, and they figured it was becasue I coudln't see well I didn't recognie them. Well, that was partly true, but it was also becasue the number of people was so large. It forced me to become good at small talk, though, and it's sort of how I handle things volunteering at my church now. Being legally blind has been a real benefit. (It's from Dandy-Walker Syndrome, which I also have a very mild form of.)

And if I kept going I'd just start praising God for what He's doen for me so I'll be quiet nowand close by just saying this: We're all unique. Asperger's is a lbel, some might be partly that and some mostly, and some fully. I don't know if I'd be considered to have it or not/ I scored 24 and then 27 takign the Wired test, so I'm borderline. It's nice havinga name for what I might have, though.

I have mild AS. I have a lot of NT traits, but enough Aspie traits to meet the ASD critera, but all of the traits are mild. It's my anxiety disorder that is severe, but the anxiety disorder is a co-morbid condition, since anxiety and low self-esteem runs in my family (well at least on my mum's side anyway, including my mum). But my family are NT.

I seem normal, and to most people my AS is covered up. It even comes natural for me to cover up my AS when interacting, except just a couple of little moments where the wrong thing might slip out. But we all sometimes say the wrong thing. Somebody said the wrong thing to me before that hurt my feelings, and I knew they didn't mean to say it because they were generally nice people. It was just one of those things that just happened on the spur of the moment.

The offical dx does not involve quantifiers such as mild/sever. Yet, you know we humans... needing to find categories and classifications and such. My daughter has been to many well versed autism professionals and every one of them has classified her as 'very high functioning' Asperger's. She has social issues and some other issues but you'd never know it on meeting her. It takes a trained eye to identify her challenges. They are there and obvious to those who know what they are looking for but only on close examination. She presents pretty 'normal'. But, that is becoming the hallmark of Asperger's in girls. Perhaps it is only considered 'mild' because they are comparing it to something more outwardly obvious, like behavioral issues and stims and such.

BINGO! Yeah, you're 100% right. My off dx made no such distinction. It's not clinical and utterly meaningless. But people will say to me, "Well, if you have Asperger's, it MUST be very mild." Mild compared to what? Their own expectations and lack of understanding?



Yeah. I was dx'd until I was adult, and it was actually a revised dx, because my psychiatrist didn't catch on at first what the real underlying issues were. She had to get to know my history better--and I had to bring up the possibility of having AS. By the time I got the nerve to ask her about me having AS, she knew me well enough to say, "Yes, that is a possibility in your case. We can certainly look into it."

I don't think I have mild Asperger's. What I have is like you say of your daughter--I'm very high functioning, but my biggest issues, my biggest disabilities, aren't things that are not obvious to a casual observer. It takes someone who knows what to look for. My alexithymia is quite profound and is still a challenge for me at my age; I didn't have obvious verbal delays, but I had deficits in expressive and intuitive language well into my college years from my hyperlexia; my executive dysfunction and dysgraphia went misunderstand until my dx, which caused a number of problems directly and indirectly; my eidetic memory interferes with my long-term memory as well as my general sense of time (who would know to look for that but someone who knows about it!); my sensory issues, which I tried so hard to downplay since childhood, had always been genuinely disabling, yet always dismissed by others as not a big deal; etc. etc. But all the same I don't have many of the stereotypical behaviors of an autistic person: I don't stim, I don't hand-flap, I don't fiddle with sensory toys, I'm not echolalic, I'm only very moderately O/C and while I definitely do better with structure and routine, I don't have meltdowns, rage episodes or panic attacks over those sorts of things. I do, however, have many behaviors common to girls and women with Asperger's like your daughter, and that's something often overlooked, because people don't realize there is a difference in how AS presents with girls/women than with boys/men--like how I tried to mask my sensory issues to avoid being ridiculed by adults for being an overly emotional, whiny little girl!! ! (Seriously, I have memories of adults telling me how "No one likes a little girl who complains like you do." Shut up and be pretty is the message many girls with AS grow up hearing, directly or indirectly.)

I dislike the phrase "mild Asperger's" because if that's referring to someone like me--someone who can and does pass in many situations for just a slightly odd NT who doesn't make much eye contact--then it seems to suggest my challenges aren't so severe. But my challenges are severe enough to impede me in having a happy, successful and fulfilling life, have caused me to spend many years trying to pretend I wasn't struggling as badly as I was and have required help in overcoming them. If that's not a disability, then what is???

Great thread.

I have Aspergers but am able to get by in many social situations - I have learnt ways.

However what bothers me is a gnawing pain and emptiness and sadness at my lack of real communication with people, a lack of real sharing and interaction - do others feel that?
I feel that others accept me, 'go through the social motions' with me, but that they are not getting the sparks of genuine sharing they get with other NT's.

Is there any way forward from this? Maybe I just have to accept it. Or maybe I have to change my game, and try to raise my high-functioning further, to look for moments of humour and connection.

Are you able to find people to share you interests with? That's what I do.
I'm rotten at small talk. I start out fine but then I get quieter and quieter and opt for just listening.
Are you able to socialise so well you show no awkwardness, gaps between talking, no umming and arring or slurred speech, or signs of boredom? I'm just curious. I don't understand what socialising would be like for mild aspies.

I haven't read through the whole thread yet but seeing this point I had to say, this sounds so much like me. People tell me that I act like I am angry, when I'm not and have no idea I'm coming across that way. I've been told I'm intimidating.

I wonder too, if I am remotely able to pass as normal then why am I always treated different from other people? Why do people react to me like I'm so different than what they would expect me to be?

@pensieve thanks. I can do the things you say I think - my wife says I'm fine - although I find it hard to make eye contact while I'm talking myself.
But I just feel it's like I'm acting - probably because I am acting! Lol - and I feel the other people are somehow not getting a buzz, not feeling it's real, not really wanting me as their friend.
But maybe I'm expecting and hoping for too much.

I find it hard too and when I do I hate the feeling and all the distractions. It's like I'm trying to guess what they're thinking half consciously when I look at their eyes.

When I talk it doesn't feel like I'm acting but using skills I've learned that start to feel like a part of myself. I might keep an opinion to myself but I can't pretend to not be an over opinionated (passionate) highly logical/literal pedantic talker. I can't pick up slang around me and use it to fit in better. The only thing fake about me is the accents that I randomly pick up and speak, yet it's out of my control.

People are either really bored with me, annoyed or trying to take it every word (that's when they lean in closer).

My boss at work said his friend's son has asberges, and he said he noticed a few things in me that would suggest I may have a mild case....

He said I take things very literally (which is true, i often get confused and don't know how to take things people say so i stick to doing as they say word for word)
I also never really take notice of ppl's body language and I also find it hard sometimes to tell if ppl are joking or not and listen to peoples words rather than how someone says something..
I also used to exclude myself from a lot of social activities as a child, like friends birthdays and stuff like that... as ive got older i have tried to help that, but i get quite stressed with someone if im in their company for too long and feel a bit awkward in groups...
And I also have a very crap attention span and have to sit and really think through what im doing to remember where i left off in a task at work :/
It's also a common occurance that ppl don't follow my train of thought, my bf says i have a funny way of thinking. I know the doctor said to my mum when i was a kid that I have mild ADHD, I don't know whether they tie in together? probably a silly question but i don't really have a clue about this. Thanks for reading i would really appreciate a reply! xx

Of course - every person is unique, and there can be significant differences between individual Aspies.

Your environment and upbringing inevitably have an effect on oyu.

i woruld say yes
as everthing does not have 1 type
everone is diffent from eatch other.

So do you think I do then? can you get worse over time? is there medication for it? does asperges effect your speech? I stutter sometimes (when im under pressure) and have been told i have an unusual way of explaining things... but it always makes sense to me... sorry to ask 100 questions! i really aprreciate answers. It's a part of me i never knew about, its a weird feeling! x

it wourd usely get better over time not worse

''Neuro-just-about-typical'' - that's classic! I like it!

But seriously, I know quite a few people who are, like, ''too Aspie to be NT but too NT to be Aspie'', if you know what I mean. I remember a few people at school were like it. I knew one boy who was so clever at logical things, really creative, yet he had learning difficulties at the same time, always had to sit at the special ed table. He was even unique in his personality, and was rather introverted - but he still seemed to fit in to the norm and was socially accepted and could also do mainstream things in the way other kids did, and didn't seem to have any trouble with making and keeping friends at all. I, on the other hand, was diagnosed with just a mild case of Asperger's and never felt different to the other kids but still could never quite fit in, and never had normal friendships with anyone, just on and off with a few girls but I never spent any time out of school with any friends at all, throughout my whole childhood. So this boy must have been ''neuro-just-about-typical'' because he was quite different to the other kids but still found it easy to fit in, all through school life.

And I know a few others who are, sort of, half-Aspie and half-NT. I think I am quarter-NT. I am not completely Aspie, probably because I'm so good at hiding it and as I've gotten older I've become better at social skills. I never have had trouble with reading body language either. I remember when I was about 8, I was playing near some trees (near me house) on my own, and I saw this man wondering about in a black leather jacket and long hair, and there was something about him that looked dodgy because he kept sculking about and looked at me a couple of times, and I ran as fast as I can to my house and told my mum. She was pleased with me for noticing because she said that most other kids wouldn't notice (which is why kids are so vulnerable to murders), and even she looked out the window and could tell something about his body language was quite iffy. He might have been just a normal person but you can't be sure these days so she was still pleased with me.

As thank u for that! It was nice to read that. I've spoken to my grandma about this and she's told me about a film to watch and has told me about some aspies who are/were total geniuses. Don't make u anything bad just makes u different n I Spose it's a good thing to be different. My mum said when I was a lil kid I never wanted to go anywhere or do anything and she said I would moan and cry until she took me home.... I am starting to kind of put pieces together and think even if I am 10% aspie and 90% NT I still wanna learn about it cos it kinda explains a lot of things. Like u said about your friend who is very logical, I am very logical yet I've been told my logic is sometimes odd and I miss out important parts and focus on what doesn't matter to most people when I'm telling something to someone etc. I just thought I was a bit strange lol! How have u found living with it then? Is there medication u take? I'm sorry if that seems like a silly question I have just only started finding out bout this really xx