Corrupt A Wish

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congrats you have a society with people who spend all of their money and are bankrupt

i wish that i wasnt depressed

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check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

You are no longer depressed, but you become so happy that it consumes you and you turn into a giant smiley face (and everyone is scared of you)

I wish to get a perfect ACT score

Granted. You get a perfect Absolutely, Completely and Totally useless score.

I wish I had fewer rules to follow at the place where I'm now.

Granted. Most of the rules are zapped, but a few are replaced by some extremely less than desirable ones (e.g. ten pieces of homework per lesson, every day).

I wish people weren't so horrible to me on this other forum.

They stop being horrible to you. Now they ignore you completely.
I wish I was Putin.

You are Putin. That's already kind of horrible by itself.

I wish I had a bigger house.

You have a bigger house. It's an Ultrahouse like the one in Treehouse of Horror XII (The Simpsons).

I wish Raina won America's Next Top Model instead of Krista.

Riana won and she also has cancer.

I wish I never ending box of Tim Tams.

Granted. Now everyone talks about the never-ending box of Timtams instead of gay marriage.
I wish my country was a nuclear superpower.

Your country is a nuclear superpower and World War III happens and the world ends.

I wish the world was free of war.

The world is free from war. All weapons are destroyed. Then the aliens invade and we are defenseless just like on that episode of the Simpsons.

I wish I was taller

You're 20'0"

I wish the internet was free of trolls.

All the trolls die. The Internet is now boring and nobody uses it anymore.
I wish humans had never existed.

Granted. Humans never existed, so they didn't make urban environments for cockroaches to thrive in by excluding most of their predators and competitors. Instead, a species of civilized frogs emerges, decides cockroaches are a delicacy and eats 'em all

I wish I could find a potato that would grow into a plant with flowers.

You find one. However, the flowers of this plant smell horrible, because they are pollinated by flies.
I wish I was a Jedi.

Granted. You are a Jedi but you also have cancer.

I wish I had a Zeppelin.