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Mountain Goat's funny sayings

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Jakki
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11 Dec 2020, 5:24 pm

Milktalk wrote:
"One fish and a small packet of chips please" said the woman to the lavatory attendant. :wink:

This sounds like it might leave a fishy taste in your mouth . :oops:


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jimmy m
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12 Dec 2020, 10:24 am

Mountain Goat there are probably good illustrators on this site. Perhaps if you asked, they might take one of your sayings and create a page in your children's book. Sort of a contest or audition. You even have a title for your book "Mountain Goat's funny sayings".


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12 Dec 2020, 10:27 am

Eat a doughnut and eat two. :)


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Last edited by Milktalk on February 31st, 2026, 01:42 am, edited 136 times in total.

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12 Dec 2020, 10:28 am

Glug spluttered the submarine as it sank below the water.


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12 Dec 2020, 10:29 am

"Sausages taste like sausages" exclaimed one sausage to another. "Is why we are called "Sausages"" he said. :jester:


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12 Dec 2020, 12:26 pm

A man notices the popularity of ice fishing in Silicon Valley, and decides to try it for herself. Determined to take the sport up properly, he heads to the library and reads, not one, but three books on ice fishing from cover to cover. Armed with a list of ice fishing gear, he heads to the nearest sporting goods store to pick out top-notch equipment.
The next day, the man heads to the nearest frozen pond and begins to set up the stool he had purchased. Settling in, he reaches for his saw and begins to cut a hole through the ice.
Booming from above comes a voice: “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!”
Jumping back, the man looks all around, but he’s alone on the ice. A bit disturbed, he moves about 20 feet down the pond, sets up his stool, and begins to saw again.
Again comes the voice: “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!”
Once again, he looks around, but just as before, there’s not a soul in sight. He decides to move clear to the other end of the pond, as far from the voice as possible. This time, just as he settles down on the stool, before he has even reached for the saw, he hears the booming voice again: “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!”
Trembling now, he calls out in a timid voice, “Is that you, God?”
“NO”, replies the voice, “I’M THE ICE HOCKEY RINK MANAGER.”



Jakki
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12 Dec 2020, 2:38 pm

auntblabby wrote:
A man notices the popularity of ice fishing in Silicon Valley, and decides to try it for herself. Determined to take the sport up properly, he heads to the library and reads, not one, but three books on ice fishing from cover to cover. Armed with a list of ice fishing gear, he heads to the nearest sporting goods store to pick out top-notch equipment.
The next day, the man heads to the nearest frozen pond and begins to set up the stool he had purchased. Settling in, he reaches for his saw and begins to cut a hole through the ice.
Booming from above comes a voice: “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!”
Jumping back, the man looks all around, but he’s alone on the ice. A bit disturbed, he moves about 20 feet down the pond, sets up his stool, and begins to saw again.
Again comes the voice: “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!”
Once again, he looks around, but just as before, there’s not a soul in sight. He decides to move clear to the other end of the pond, as far from the voice as possible. This time, just as he settles down on the stool, before he has even reached for the saw, he hears the booming voice again: “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!”
Trembling now, he calls out in a timid voice, “Is that you, God?”
“NO”, replies the voice, “I’M THE ICE HOCKEY RINK MANAGER.”



Lolololz....he he ..he


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12 Dec 2020, 2:54 pm

What time was it at 1030 pm last night? :)


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Jakki
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12 Dec 2020, 2:57 pm

Milktalk wrote:
What time was it at 1030 pm last night? :)





Lololzz


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12 Dec 2020, 3:49 pm

Stop staring said the man as he looked at himself in the mirror. :D


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12 Dec 2020, 4:05 pm

"Wobble" said the ladder as the man walked up its middle.


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Milktalk
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12 Dec 2020, 4:17 pm

What the beep beep was that?
Said the car.
As it swerved to avoid an ant. :mrgreen:


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12 Dec 2020, 5:07 pm

Church in the morning said the mouse as it combed its hair.


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Jakki
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12 Dec 2020, 5:12 pm

The Grouch , lost its Ouch , so it no longer could be a Grouch


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12 Dec 2020, 5:18 pm

Hehe.


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13 Dec 2020, 3:51 am

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