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Jono
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12 Feb 2016, 6:59 pm

She's now shared a link to the following site on that blog post:

http://heartlessaspergers.com/how-to-spot-a-man-with-aspergers-syndrome/

God that is horrible. Take a browse on that site if you can stomach it.



Grammar Geek
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12 Feb 2016, 7:07 pm

We need to get that site shut down before people start believing this s**t even more. I can't find a place to report that site, though.



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13 Feb 2016, 7:35 pm

Jono wrote:
She's now shared a link to the following site on that blog post:

http://heartlessaspergers.com/how-to-spot-a-man-with-aspergers-syndrome/

God that is horrible. Take a browse on that site if you can stomach it.


OH DEAR GOD IT"S LIKE MENTAL ACID POURED INTO YOUR BRAIN!! !! !! !! :x :x
I hate stuff like this. I should have taken your warning more seriously before I clicked holy crap.

I can't believe this.....I'm VERY shocked by this poor poor pathetic just terrible ... material just so... 8O :x
... well, internet, thanks for that.
She even goes into that "autism can't know itself" BS geezus. What a horribly misled person.



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14 Feb 2016, 11:10 am

TBH, I see stuff like this all the time on Men's Rights website and blogs about borderline women. They take the worst possible manifestation of a severe borderline and use to across the board warn every man possibly that any women who isn't absolutely perfect is damaged and is acting to hide their "real self" until marriage and kids. They even bring up bright/unusual hair colors or short hair as early warning signs that the woman is mentally unstable because these things make women "ugly" so to woman has to be mentally unstable to make herself look that way. Who really believes this? Mostly no one, except a tiny segment of men who don't ever interact with woman or men who had a REALLY bad relationship with one borderline woman and are now set in their opinion. I feel like the people on this site are the same. Trying to get it taken offline isn't helpful and just re-enforces their opinion about aspergers. I think the most important thing to do is try and create media representations that accurately reflect being on spectrum including online. For every one of these sites, or the 4chan sperger stereotype, or the blog of the angry mom of a LF autistic child who thinks aspergers children are a pointless waste of resources, or the weird "my Aspergers is the next stage of human evolution" person that comes up on google there should be 10 google results that come back to people creating positive representations of the spectrum.

Edit: just saw this and wondering if this person has even met anyone with asperger's before : "Initially, a woman may admire the man’s intelligence, knowledge, good manners, old-fashioned sensibilities, unconventional charm, child-like qualities, and his practical, rational way of looking at the world."



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15 Feb 2016, 2:43 pm

Grammar Geek wrote:
We need to get that site shut down before people start believing this s**t even more. I can't find a place to report that site, though.


It doesn't work like that. She's not doing anything illegal. I suppose if she were a licensed counselor or psychiatrist or something, you could report her to authorities or peers in that field, and they could deal with her in some way. But she's not, and even if she were, she'd still have the right to her site.

The way to respond isn't blocking all the negative "info" out there, but to drown it out with good information.



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15 Feb 2016, 3:18 pm

Another thought...

She says that while the inner state or intentions of the AS individual might be different than the psychopath, the effects of AS on those around him/her are identical to psychopathy, so, who cares which it is - treat them the same way.

I'm going to apply her own logic to her:

Her inner state and intentions might be different than a troll, but the effects of her "public service announcement" on those on her website are identical to trolling, so, who cares which it is - treat it the same way.

She probably didn't write the article just to piss people off. But now that she has, she is feeding off of the negative attention she's getting. Which is how trolls work. The first step in dealing with a troll is to realize trolling is going on, and treating it as such, so you don't get sucked into it.



wilburforce
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15 Feb 2016, 4:19 pm

Juggernaut wrote:
Another thought...

She says that while the inner state or intentions of the AS individual might be different than the psychopath, the effects of AS on those around him/her are identical to psychopathy, so, who cares which it is - treat them the same way.

I'm going to apply her own logic to her:

Her inner state and intentions might be different than a troll, but the effects of her "public service announcement" on those on her website are identical to trolling, so, who cares which it is - treat it the same way.

She probably didn't write the article just to piss people off. But now that she has, she is feeding off of the negative attention she's getting. Which is how trolls work. The first step in dealing with a troll is to realize trolling is going on, and treating it as such, so you don't get sucked into it.


I know that you're right. She isn't worth getting upset over, she's just a single very misguided and misinformed idiot. It's just troubling the idea that there are many other idiots out there who might read her blog and take it as valuable information. There is already so much stigma and misinformation out there about autism, it's annoying to know there is one more source of it. It just adds a little bit more s**t to the ocean of ignorance and stigma we have to wade through every day just to exist and be around other people.


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Juggernaut
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15 Feb 2016, 9:34 pm

wilburforce wrote:
There is already so much stigma and misinformation out there about autism, it's annoying to know there is one more source of it. It just adds a little bit more s**t to the ocean of ignorance and stigma we have to wade through every day just to exist and be around other people.


Yeah, I know. Sometimes I forget that this sort of mindset still exists, considering the progress that's been made over the years. Guess it's useful to be reminded that it does. And not just her, the fact that she has links to multiple websites with the same attitude.



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17 Feb 2016, 12:12 am

Shirazi wrote:
High functioning aspies are very often attractive as partners for low-functioning, romantically frustrated narcissists or borderlines with narcissistic traits who are themselves not socially succesful and appear harmless or even pathetic to others but will be domineering and brutal towards victims who are weaker than them. This works with pathologically dependent people because they get something they want out the relationship, but no one else. Ironically they are also prime targets for exploitation by more intelligent, high-functioning narcissists/sociopaths because their emotional structure is so primitive and easy to manipulate.

Dear God, that describes my parents to a T.


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Jono
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23 Feb 2016, 5:52 am

Juggernaut wrote:
Grammar Geek wrote:
We need to get that site shut down before people start believing this s**t even more. I can't find a place to report that site, though.


It doesn't work like that. She's not doing anything illegal. I suppose if she were a licensed counselor or psychiatrist or something, you could report her to authorities or peers in that field, and they could deal with her in some way. But she's not, and even if she were, she'd still have the right to her site.

The way to respond isn't blocking all the negative "info" out there, but to drown it out with good information.


I've just found out that the person who created that site is a member of the ASPartners forum:

http://forums.delphiforums.com/aspartners/messages/?msg=13926.1

Oh, and by the way, talking about good information and licensed counsellors, they are now all bitching about an article written about by a counsellor that does give some "good" information. What makes matters worse is that, that particular article was actually taken down yesterday after Merissa or Brianna or whatever left a comment on it and had somewhat of an exchange with the author of the good article entitled "Five Good Reasons to Love an Aspie", though it's still in the Google Cache:

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:GvLOCiIr2i0J:www.couplestherapyinc.com/five-good-reasons-to-love-an-aspie/+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

You can scroll down to a comment by someone called "Brianna" to see what the exchange was. So, judging by the comments on the ASPartner's thread, they are quite happy to try and block the "good" information but from our side we can't do anything about the "bad" information? My intent is not necessarily to block the negative stuff but we have to at least stand up to them trying to marginalise the positive stuff and attempts to correct misinformation and misconceptions.



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23 Feb 2016, 11:50 am

She has black and white thinking that would make a severe autistic seem typical, she has no empathy, she has little ability to read people evident by her continuing to get into relationships with as*holes and taking a long time to figure it out, she has an obsessive special interest, a sense of justice ala a warped one rescuing NT women from aspie men.

We often tend to hate in others what we hate in ourselves. That why you see so many religoius figures denouncing homosexuality getting caught abusing little boys. I am highly suspicoius she is a self hating aspie. Unfortunatly she has found a platform to do damage to the women who follow her and thier partners and to people who would have had wonderful relationships that will never happen because she scared people off.


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23 Feb 2016, 3:02 pm

The hallmark of fanaticism to me is their continuous attempt to create polarisation with malice. I thought the response from the psychologist was good - they are cruel rather than ignorant, they want to make autism a hate-ism, they behave and write like the KKK of autism.

APOM, I have long thought that Simon Baron-Cohen is on the spectrum and knows it though he will never acknowledge it and hides behind his research. He deliberately distances himself from his perhaps more obviously on the spectrum cousin Sacha. IMO, wearing the guise of "the great academic objectivity" cloak - which I have know several fanatics to assume - Simon Baron-Cohen has done far more damage in seeding and fertilising toxic myths about autism than the obviously malicious members at AdelphiForums. Simom Baron-Cohen has pulled his head in a bit in recent years though (thank goodness as there has been more adverse critiques of his research, attitudes and always pronouncing his findings as if they were Holy Writ (not good form in science).



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24 Feb 2016, 1:27 am

Jono wrote:
Juggernaut wrote:
Grammar Geek wrote:
We need to get that site shut down before people start believing this s**t even more. I can't find a place to report that site, though.


It doesn't work like that. She's not doing anything illegal. I suppose if she were a licensed counselor or psychiatrist or something, you could report her to authorities or peers in that field, and they could deal with her in some way. But she's not, and even if she were, she'd still have the right to her site.

The way to respond isn't blocking all the negative "info" out there, but to drown it out with good information.


I've just found out that the person who created that site is a member of the ASPartners forum:

http://forums.delphiforums.com/aspartners/messages/?msg=13926.1

Oh, and by the way, talking about good information and licensed counsellors, they are now all bitching about an article written about by a counsellor that does give some "good" information. What makes matters worse is that, that particular article was actually taken down yesterday after Merissa or Brianna or whatever left a comment on it and had somewhat of an exchange with the author of the good article entitled "Five Good Reasons to Love an Aspie", though it's still in the Google Cache:

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:GvLOCiIr2i0J:www.couplestherapyinc.com/five-good-reasons-to-love-an-aspie/+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

You can scroll down to a comment by someone called "Brianna" to see what the exchange was. So, judging by the comments on the ASPartner's thread, they are quite happy to try and block the "good" information but from our side we can't do anything about the "bad" information? My intent is not necessarily to block the negative stuff but we have to at least stand up to them trying to marginalise the positive stuff and attempts to correct misinformation and misconceptions.



She must not have read this:


Okay, so many people right off are going to say any “Reason to Love an Aspie” are generalizations and these aren’t true of everybody with Aspergers Syndrome. They say, (and with good reason,) “If you’ve met one person with Aspergers, you’ve met one person with Aspergers.” But there are generalizations you can make about why to love an Aspie, and like all generalizations, of course they won’t hold true for everybody.
Why to love an aspie: five good reasonsI’ve had the good fortune of being in contact with a number of people over the past month who are in intimate relationships with a person with Aspergers Syndrome (AS), a mild form of autism, or themselves have AS. I’ve taken a passionate interest in the subject of Love, Relationships and AS-NT bonds. Most stuff on the internet tell you about problems with these couples. Here are some of the good reasons to love an aspie.


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Jono
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24 Feb 2016, 6:17 am

League_Girl wrote:
Jono wrote:
Juggernaut wrote:
Grammar Geek wrote:
We need to get that site shut down before people start believing this s**t even more. I can't find a place to report that site, though.


It doesn't work like that. She's not doing anything illegal. I suppose if she were a licensed counselor or psychiatrist or something, you could report her to authorities or peers in that field, and they could deal with her in some way. But she's not, and even if she were, she'd still have the right to her site.

The way to respond isn't blocking all the negative "info" out there, but to drown it out with good information.


I've just found out that the person who created that site is a member of the ASPartners forum:

http://forums.delphiforums.com/aspartners/messages/?msg=13926.1

Oh, and by the way, talking about good information and licensed counsellors, they are now all bitching about an article written about by a counsellor that does give some "good" information. What makes matters worse is that, that particular article was actually taken down yesterday after Merissa or Brianna or whatever left a comment on it and had somewhat of an exchange with the author of the good article entitled "Five Good Reasons to Love an Aspie", though it's still in the Google Cache:

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:GvLOCiIr2i0J:www.couplestherapyinc.com/five-good-reasons-to-love-an-aspie/+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

You can scroll down to a comment by someone called "Brianna" to see what the exchange was. So, judging by the comments on the ASPartner's thread, they are quite happy to try and block the "good" information but from our side we can't do anything about the "bad" information? My intent is not necessarily to block the negative stuff but we have to at least stand up to them trying to marginalise the positive stuff and attempts to correct misinformation and misconceptions.



She must not have read this:


Okay, so many people right off are going to say any “Reason to Love an Aspie” are generalizations and these aren’t true of everybody with Aspergers Syndrome. They say, (and with good reason,) “If you’ve met one person with Aspergers, you’ve met one person with Aspergers.” But there are generalizations you can make about why to love an Aspie, and like all generalizations, of course they won’t hold true for everybody.
Why to love an aspie: five good reasonsI’ve had the good fortune of being in contact with a number of people over the past month who are in intimate relationships with a person with Aspergers Syndrome (AS), a mild form of autism, or themselves have AS. I’ve taken a passionate interest in the subject of Love, Relationships and AS-NT bonds. Most stuff on the internet tell you about problems with these couples. Here are some of the good reasons to love an aspie.


She doesn't care. In her mind, all aspies are the same. I mean this is the same woman who wrote a blog post claiming that aspies are like psychopaths, remember?



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24 Feb 2016, 11:13 am

So you are saying she is capable of reading and comprehending but she is just choosing to be ignorant.

Does she own both websites, the one in your OP you linked and then the other one she linked in her ASPartner post?


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24 Feb 2016, 3:40 pm

League_Girl wrote:
So you are saying she is capable of reading and comprehending but she is just choosing to be ignorant.

Does she own both websites, the one in your OP you linked and then the other one she linked in her ASPartner post?


She created both websites as far as I know. One of her later posts in that thread that I linked to on ASPartners confirms that by mentioning that she created the "heartlessasperger" site after the backlash she got from aspies due to making that blogpost comparing aspies to psychopaths.