Website against Asperger's Syndrome: HeartlessAspergers.com

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Yes there's actually plenty of NTs married to Aspies who have blog sites which have nothing but positive things to say.
http://aspiewriter.com/2012/08/i-marrie ... ve-on.html
This suggests there are very accommodating and understanding NTs out there, although it probably helps (judging from the blog site) you have qualities that NT people admire such as attractiveness and intelligence.

very interesting... see from 25.20

Peter Vermeulen at Good Autism Practice Conference 2014 youtube video


it is not possible to post links here

see on amazonco.uk or amazon.com

FLIPP the Switch: Strengthen Executive Function Skills

Autism as Context Blindness

Challenging the Myths of Autism: New Perspectives, New Strategies, New Hope

Late, Lost, and Unprepared: A Parents' Guide to Helping Children with Executive Functioning

Autism Spectrum Disorders in Adolescents and Adults: Evidence-Based and Promising Interventions

Navigating the Social World: A Curriculum for Individuals with Asperger's Syndrome, High Functioning Autism and Related Disorders

Asperger Syndrome - A Love Story

Switched on: A Memoir of Brain Change and Emotional Awakening

I repeat, a lack of empathy is a symptom of many neurological disorders. But something happened and autism is now compared with narcissism and sociopathy instead of schizophrenia, bipolar, Alzheimer, schizoaffective, parkinsons, or even alcohol changes to the brain. I have my own theories of why and they are not the kind that believe people were originally out to get autistic people in the first place.

To add, the phrase "lack of empathy" carries connotations. I imagine there is a language out there that distinguishes the personality defect "lack of empathy" versus the neurological disorder kind. In media and popular culture, it is easy to mix ideas just because they share a word. I even remember conservapedia claims the theory of relativity is false because the site creator doesn't believe in moral relativism. So people will look at the description of a psychopath "lacking empathy" (being a villian) with a bipolar schizophrenic who lacks empathy (in the neurological sense) as the same.

Ideas spread like viruses or seeds, but an idea can arise in people when you tell them something that is not exactly the idea (sorta how zen koans work, a student generates the idea from a riddle or tale that seems absurd and cryptic at first glance from the master). Some result from a completely different definition of a word. The american definition of socialism vs the european definition, the american definition of a republic vs the european definition. Arguments can be had because two people disagree over something they have completely different definitions for.

How can arguing get anything done if nobody can decide what they mean by "empathy".

This is why I prefer the opinions of neurologists and psychiatrists and can't stand all the books and articles psychologists churn out to the masses.

[/quote]
The website is not for aspies, it's clearly written/aimed at NTs who are contemplating getting into an relationship with an aspie. It's purpose (from the author's perspective) is to educate the NT partner to be fully informed before getting into a long term relationship.[/quote]

the heartlessaspergers(HLA) website is written to make women avoid men with aspergers.(what about the NT men in relation to AS girls??)

Some men with aspergers are on the level the author of HLA describe... but i think it is wrong to say that everybody are on that level.

Books about emotional intelligence(=social intelligence), self-awareness, empathy:

Books of Daniel Goleman, Karla Mclaren, Matthieu Ricard...

other books: How to See Yourself As You Really Are
Cultivating Empathy: The Worth and Dignity of Every Person--Without Exception
The Art of Communicating av Thich Nhat Hanh
I dont know whether Jiddu Krishnamurti discuss some of these subjects, probably yes.

everybody interested in self-development must have at least one psychological dictionary

I think Omraam Mikhael Aivanhov also is a very relevant philosopher for the person interested in developing empathy, emotional intelligence etc etc

+ a lot of books about "dating science"...

i can also recommend T Harv Eker...

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: Think Rich to Get Rich!

it is important to remember that experience teach you things that books never can tell you.

important to develop intuition....

my opinion is that homeopathy can alleviate aspergers, for me it is no doubt about that....

Oh wonderful. You mean just the same way that that Stormfront web page is not for black people, it's purpose is just to educate white on proper race relations before dealing with them. See what I did there?

No that's ok. The OP contacted me and it appears I have midunderstood his intention.

https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/imag ... KcEm7tq7gQ

Super cringey website. The owner likes Silence of the Lambs way too much.

Oh my goodness- the About page is hilarious. The owner is some pissed off female who was with a guy for a short time who she decided had Asperger's because he was abusive.

I suspect the reason why the page is speaking in absolutes is to get a point across. The neurotypical person who reads it will at first believe it and think in absolutes but will slowly with more knowledge will come to their own conclusion which weighs everything and realizes that like all neurological disorders, relationships will have hardship. That is where we could come in, but you don't take that option. If it was commonly accepted autism is a disorder and not some amazing gift like you and they keep trying to insist. The site wouldn't exist. Nobody denies being addicted to heroin is bad, but if you keep saying heroin addiction is good, the stress will build up over and over and someone will make a similar site. Had the stress been relieved a long time ago and more disability services were provided like with say alzheimers where there is plenty of support for spouses to make things more manageable, the resentment would not build. Heck, even hearing from your own spouse saying "I have an illness" instead of "I have this amazing gift, how dare you!" will provide much needed relief.

That is where i distinguish the ongoing traumatic relationship disorder and the cassandra phenemona. OTRS is not unique to autism, many things can cause relationship hardship, but the cassandra phenemoa is not being believed that the spouse has a disorder to begin with. It is unique in the western world for autism (but in asian countries where all mental illness is often denied or swept under the rug, it could apply to other disorders but we are an english speaking forum though) "My spouse is bipolar and it's tough" "Okay, that is a disorder"
"My spouse is autistic and it's tough" "How dare you!, autism is a gift and not an illness requiring intervention, let their autism flourish!"

The web and elsewhere are full of horror stories and commisirating about bieng in a relationship with a narcissist, this is a support forum for partners of depressed people. Depression is viewed as wholly negative and narcissism is probably the most universally vilified condition of the day. I think the neurodiversity movement is a convient thing for some people who are unhappy with thier partners or thier own autism to complain about. This is human nature.

There are definitely people who think Autism is a gift and all thier difficulties are societies fault. In reading here and ND blogs a lot they are a minority. Most view it as mostly or completly negative or a combination of negatives and positives. Autism is different from most conditions in that it is not wholly viewed as a problem and a lot of people feel threatened by that for a variety of reasons.

I cannot think of anything positive about depression except getting over it.