Psychiatry is frustrating but the problem you seem to have is being angry. I'm saying it may be the anger itself that is worsening your symptoms, because anger is not treatable through medication, you need to express what you feel without lashing out at others and blaming others for things you can't always control. It's nothing to be ashamed of, you just feel angry because you got stuck with a sh***y illness. Anyways, I'm no one to judge. I just think maybe if you practice affirmations and therapy it will help you deal with symptoms. I was told that delusions could not be overcame through therapy, but I did. I wrote a memoir venting my frustration with how i was treated by the system. It was helpful because I can now look back and see how my judgement was impaired and how I also had some justified reasons to feel that way. By expressing the anger and frustration in healthy ways, you will essentially exorcise those feelings. I hope you do take this advice.
People have reasons to feel upset and everyone's got a reason to justify theirs. I don't justify my anger, not even at my mom who has been unstable and sometimes verbally taxing. But because of how I am compassionate towards her, she will go out to lunch with me and I can try to help her even if she isn't on meds. She does function fine off meds, but she has a delusional disorder too, and so do i. The comparison and differences is obvious between us. I Take medication and do not go into delusions, while she will sometimes flip a switch and be upset over things that just are not true. Such as confusing a surgery for a broken arm where we all were there supporting her with some kind of evil conspiracy...
Another thing is, I stuck with the same medication for about six years. So I didn't try a whole lot of different ones for very long other than Seroquel. You may be having trouble adjusting to the anti-psychotics if you take them, and not all of them work. I started taking ADHD meds, it helps with frustration for some people, well it's helping me feel calmer already. Either way, the root cause of your frustration may need to be looked at by you so you can find more help.
I hope this helps. I'm no doctor. All I know is through positive thoughts and focusing, I even cured myself of sleep paralysis. It was reoccurring, until I learned how Carl Jung would have seen it. Archetypal beliefs are what people base language and personality on, I think that's how I can best describe it.
For instance, the king in you may feel his castle is threatened by a trespassing knight who represents the "illness" and therefore you feel a need to lash out and your anger stems from the archetype of warrior. You are fighting something that isn't worth fighting in the defensive sense. The foreign knight is actually carrying a message from a far off kingdom, and you can welcome the knight to discuss more practical matters of how to deal with the "threat". You can choose to see the army that has entered your subconscoius as vilians or as aspects of the whole, other elements of your world. Once you find a peaceful integration with all the aspects of your consciousness, you will begin to heal.
IMO Jung was onto something by collective conscoiusness, meaning the world has many layers but there are basic elements to human survival. The biggest one is to act out of conscoius understanding and not use violence as a means of getting things. We are bombarded with many subliminal references that can sometimes send the message that being a warrior is better than a pacifist, but that's cultural. If you think any of this helps, perhaps seek a Jungian type Psychologist. They still exist but aren't popular among the psychiatric practice since meds are too emphasized as the cure all.
04 Aug 2012, 11:36 am
