What does one truly miss long-term? (My theories on love.)

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Mootoo
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16 Feb 2014, 4:48 am

So... it begins with a sexual and usually personal attraction... then the relationship becomes more intimate and longer-term, usually... but, how does one know how love works? (When it's lost, of course...)

So... straight after it's lost what possibly happens psychologically? Kind of like withdrawals, I think... and possibly the reverse of what initially happened (let's say, for the sake of using a scientific analogy, that love is an infectious disease... the antigen first try to infect an organism, then the body is altered in return until it produces antibodies) - there is sexual frustration at first, as that was the foundation of the relationship, but long-term what would a person truly miss?

I think the memories that remain are the core of the relationship (hm, I wonder if this could be applied to any relationship...) - in this instance related to the evolved love. I don't think love is any static connection... it grows and is mutually nurtured... the sexual aspects are like the frost on a cake, but love is the substance... (hope I'm not being hopelessly romantic here...)

...what I miss about my former love is the switching of the two different varieties of pizza around, so both had half of each, his lips when he was trying to focus, his smile as I marveled at the sight of him in the beginning... although I also miss spooning, of course...



Last edited by Mootoo on 16 Feb 2014, 6:15 am, edited 1 time in total.

Aspinator
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16 Feb 2014, 5:14 am

To use another scientific analogy; I personally feel that love is just a prequisitite to procreation. Without an initial attraction the two people would never get together and reproduce the species.
Just as with any type of "drug" that makes you high you want to repeat it. Once two people become a couple and have children,
the "drug" has served its purpose. The two people can certainly learn to tolerate each other and settle into their roles to raise their off-spring, then the cycle repeats itself.



Aspinator
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16 Feb 2014, 5:14 am

To use another scientific analogy; I personally feel that love is just a prequisitite to procreation. Without an initial attraction the two people would never get together and reproduce the species.
Just as with any type of "drug" that makes you high you want to repeat it. Once two people become a couple and have children,
the "drug" has served its purpose. The two people can certainly learn to tolerate each other and settle into their roles to raise their off-spring, then the cycle repeats itself.



Mootoo
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16 Feb 2014, 5:26 am

Hah, I missed that... (guess why? Well, it's because that analogy wouldn't work for homosexual relationships... would it?)



Aspinator
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16 Feb 2014, 5:36 am

No, that analogy would not work for people of the same sex but I still feel it is applicable to people of the opposite sex. Sorry for the double post; the first time I got an error message and I didn't think it went through.



linatet
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16 Feb 2014, 6:37 am

Mootoo wrote:
Hah, I missed that... (guess why? Well, it's because that analogy wouldn't work for homosexual relationships... would it?)

I read a theory that homosexuals (and assexuals) evolutionary speaking are a result of kinship selection, because they don't reproduce and provide more resources for their sisters' kids, therefore raising the chances of surviving of their genes. It's stated like that because non-heterosexual populations exist in all human communities (like from 1 to 10%, many estimate) and is said to be constant in time and to a great percentage and many roots seem to be genetic. I like this theory but I have to admit I don't understand much of biology.