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K_Kelly
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16 Jan 2017, 10:12 pm

I want to try hooking up with a girl in real life. Is it any harder then dating? I ideally wanted a relationship, but I haven't figured myself out yet, aparently.

How can I learn the skills, if any? Am I being bad for wanting a hook-up now?



AngelRho
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16 Jan 2017, 10:35 pm

*sigh*

I wouldn't do it. I'm not saying I've never done it, I'm not saying you can't do it. I'm just saying it reduces men to mere tools and women to washcloths to mop up our needs. That's just not a place I ever want to be again, and it doesn't really satisfy anything.

The usual diatribes I go on about friendship and dating applies to hookups as well. But to be honest, I think you owe yourself better than that.



Grammar Geek
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16 Jan 2017, 10:37 pm

You're not a bad person at all for wanting it, although it's nearly impossible for me. I'm bisexual, and even guys aren't interested, and if they are, they stop talking to me eventually. Girls don't even swipe right on me even though I swipe right on almost every one of them. So I have no clue on how to get hookups. goldfish21 says he can get them every day if he wants to, which leaves me green with envy. I have no idea how he does that.



314pe
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17 Jan 2017, 1:40 am

K_Kelly wrote:
I want to try hooking up with a girl in real life. Is it any harder then dating?

Yes, it's harder. Unless you're conventionally good looking, it's unlikely to work out.



Datalis
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17 Jan 2017, 7:31 am

You also have to find your "market" so to speak. In other words, certain types of women will be more attracted to you than others; generally speaking. For example since I'm muscular and now sport a shaved head, younger women aren't as attracted to me, unless they are black women. Older women and black women I know from experience, like the tough guy look. Younger white women generally like the boyish look. To quote the late and great Lemmy Kilmister, "I'm a lone wolf ligger But I ain't no pretty boy."



TheSpectrum
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17 Jan 2017, 11:59 am

Unless you have high testosterone and have overcome any social anxieties with your ASD I really don't recommend it.
It'll only make you feel worthless and you'll enter a cycle of having to do it again until you "prove" something to yourself, with "results" being few and far between.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Jan 2017, 2:29 pm

TheSpectrum wrote:
Unless you have high testosterone and have overcome any social anxieties with your ASD I really don't recommend it.
It'll only make you feel worthless and you'll enter a cycle of having to do it again until you "prove" something to yourself, with "results" being few and far between.


I have followed this route and there's some truth in what you are saying.

But I don't think I would be feeling better now if I remained virgin or going for escorts.



Datalis
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18 Jan 2017, 9:35 am

TheSpectrum wrote:
Unless you have high testosterone and have overcome any social anxieties with your ASD I really don't recommend it.
It'll only make you feel worthless and you'll enter a cycle of having to do it again until you "prove" something to yourself, with "results" being few and far between.

Well, OP is only 25 so his testosterone SHOULD be fine if he takes care of himself and if he's not on SSRIs.



The_Face_of_Boo
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18 Jan 2017, 9:46 am

Datalis wrote:
You also have to find your "market" so to speak. In other words, certain types of women will be more attracted to you than others; generally speaking. For example since I'm muscular and now sport a shaved head, younger women aren't as attracted to me, unless they are black women. Older women and black women I know from experience, like the tough guy look. Younger white women generally like the boyish look. To quote the late and great Lemmy Kilmister, "I'm a lone wolf ligger But I ain't no pretty boy."


In my case it's the Asian women and....the very conservative middle-eastern women(whom I avoid).

It's so weird, as if each community has a hive mind controller that sends commands to the whole community to make all its members all synchronized in considering what's attractive and what's not.

So scary...so scary....

Check this thread: viewtopic.php?t=275336

and in particular this post:

Quote:
As it seems from this experiment, that women don't generally like to stray far from the communities they belong to.

Maybe your theory is correct, a "Muslim-looking" person would probably make the Europeans think Polygamy/Veil/Islamist/Boom-boom :lol:, so no wonder the reaction would be swiping left.

But that still doesn't explain why the Far-Eastern/Western Asians and Western/African Blacks (most of those are non-muslim either) are more inclined to tolerate my "Muslim-looks".


This experiment is really fascinating, think about it, a same specimen (me in this case) is seen attractive by 20% to 30% of samples of women in some countries there while it's seen attractive by barely 1% in other countries. Like....wow...really, wow.

That's sad, this experiment also shows that it doesn't seem that what's seen as attractive is really that individualistic like some of our ladies fellas keep to convince us here (YES WP ladies, I am pointing at you!! :evil: :twisted:)- but there's seem to be strongly influenced by environment, in other word, if you are seen as ugly by the first 100-200 women you encounter in some community/country, then chances that you're screwed and you're probably generally seen as ugly by the vast majority of the women of this community/country, there's not much individualistic taste in that.


So yeah bottom line for WP guys: If you feel that you are seen unattractive by the majority of women living in your country/community then that's probably true, and it would be wiser to look elsewhere if you can. And yes, guys also deserve to seek for "The one" and not only women should do that, and for that you would need a lot of suitors - Like how most women do, you need a constant NUMBERS of suitors willing to date you in order to filter them through, (and no it's not enough to get one date once in a blue moon for that), otherwise you would either stay alone or pick whatever the only (or of the very few) choice(s) you may get, and the latter way can end up even worse



Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 18 Jan 2017, 9:55 am, edited 1 time in total.

nurseangela
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18 Jan 2017, 9:48 am

Howdy. I'm a little bit naive here. What is hooking up?


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Datalis
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18 Jan 2017, 9:52 am

nurseangela wrote:
Howdy. I'm a little bit naive here. What is hooking up?

No strings attached.



Datalis
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18 Jan 2017, 9:54 am

Wait, OP what do you mean you haven't figured "yourself out yet, apparently"?



nurseangela
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18 Jan 2017, 10:19 am

Datalis wrote:
nurseangela wrote:
Howdy. I'm a little bit naive here. What is hooking up?

No strings attached.


So, does this mean no date? You just say "hey, let's meet at this place and do the nasty and leave"? No money either? I'm confused. What is the difference between hooking up and going to a prostitute?


_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.


Datalis
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18 Jan 2017, 10:31 am

nurseangela wrote:
Datalis wrote:
nurseangela wrote:
Howdy. I'm a little bit naive here. What is hooking up?

No strings attached.


So, does this mean no date? You just say "hey, let's meet at this place and do the nasty and leave"? No money either? I'm confused. What is the difference between hooking up and going to a prostitute?

Hooking up is cheaper. Hooking up is more of a friend's with benefits ordeal. No, you have to tell them in a more subtle way. Sluts don't like to think of themselves as sluts, even though they are. I don't do this by the way, but I've witnessed my friend do this and I was young once and had the same mindset as OP.



nurseangela
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18 Jan 2017, 10:34 am

Datalis wrote:
nurseangela wrote:
Datalis wrote:
nurseangela wrote:
Howdy. I'm a little bit naive here. What is hooking up?

No strings attached.


So, does this mean no date? You just say "hey, let's meet at this place and do the nasty and leave"? No money either? I'm confused. What is the difference between hooking up and going to a prostitute?

Hooking up is cheaper. Hooking up is more of a friend's with benefits ordeal. No, you have to tell them in a more subtle way. Sluts don't like to think of themselves as sluts, even though they are. I don't do this by the way, but I've witnessed my friend do this and I was young once and had the same mindset as OP.


In my mind, the men are just as guilty as the women. What do they call male sluts, btw?


_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.


Sabreclaw
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18 Jan 2017, 10:35 am

nurseangela wrote:
What do they call male sluts, btw?


Studs.