Youngest age to date with a girl?
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
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Location: Adelaide, Australia
I'm 18 years older than my wife, and we've been together 12 years and have two kids. When I was much younger (28), I dated a woman 14 years my senior. Do what works for you.
Wow so you were 42 and she was 24? Impressive! I can only hope to have that much appeal when I'm 42.
Yeah, she's smart and beautiful too. No idea what she was thinking.
How did you do it? Were you charming? Were you middle class? Did you impress her with your wealth or your good looks? What did you do?
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AngelRho
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Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 45
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Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile
I just read this as a statement of fact, that one sex is not in a better position to view things than the other. That both views are valid. I find 'if in doubt, take it literally' works well on here when I think someones being offensive.
If true, then why point out that I’m a heterosexual male AT ALL? Saying I’m “not more qualified” solely on the basis that I’m a cis hetero male is entirely unnecessary. Chronos, if I am to give her the benefit of the doubt, might not have intended any offense. But sadly, that is the world we live in. That statement was deeply offensive, and similar statements very often are PURPOSEFULLY offensive.
I do not claim or pretend to speak for all women. I speak for what I observe in real life. I’m an inquisitive person and find the subject fascinating. I do not believe I’m always right about everything. I don’t feel compelled to prove I’m right about anything.
But I WILL NOT stand idly by while someone uses shaming language on the basis of my gender or orientation. Disagree with me? Fine. We can keep civil counterpoint going all day if I have the time for it. Even if I think you’re wrong, I will still respect that you sincerely believe what you say. Bringing gender into this is going too far. It is inappropriate, and if Chronos is unaware that it is inappropriate, perhaps now is the time for her to become aware of that.
I would never condescend to tell a woman she couldn’t possibly understand men’s issues based purely on the fact she’s a woman. I’m offended by the implication that I can’t relate anything I’ve heard women say JUST BECAUSE I’m a man, hence I’m “not...qualified.” That IS shaming. Supposing I take it literally...hello??? Exactly what other conclusions am I supposed to draw from that “literal” statement???
That not more means not more, she didn't say your view was worth less, she said it wasn't worth more. If you mean she was implying something else, I wouldn't know because I can't pick up that kind of thing .
I don’t hate Chronos and it might have been an honest mistake. Maybe I haven’t read enough posts from her, but it struck me as so unusual to the point I had to read the comment AGAIN and then I wondered if her account had been hacked and someone was trolling me.
As I said, if we merely disagreed, I could respect that. If she meant what you said she meant, and you might be right, then it shouldn’t matter if I’m a hetero male, female, or a bisexual trans hermaphrodite unicorn that poops rainbow frozen yogurt. It shouldn’t even have entered the conversation. But SHE brought gender into the conversation when she insinuated that my views are problematic on the basis of my gender. I don’t mean the content of the discussion, I just mean attacking the validity of my views based on being a straight man. Attacking my views is not an assault on me. Trying to invalidate my views by bringing up my being a straight man IS such an attack.
I’ve never had any beef with Chronos before and if she doesn’t apologize now I won’t hold it against her. Simply not having it happen again will suffice and we shall speak no more of it. So unless it comes up again I have no more to say. Consider it dropped.
The_Face_of_Boo
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Age: 41
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Posts: 32,890
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
I will let this go but first I need to make this clear, if there are any bisexual trans hermaphrodite unicorns that poop rainbow frozen yogurt out there reading this, please say hello.
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A lot of times when very young girls and women go for older men it's because they want a man who has more stability and emotional maturity in their life than someone their age.
We’ve hardly dispelled anything because it’s hardly a myth. The false assumption has been made that I was strictly speaking in sexual terms.
The “handsome for a grandpa,” yeah, I predict that more younger women would agree that he’s attractive. George Clooney might be another example. Charlie Sheen BEFORE the HIV revelation. Tom Cruise. NOT octogenarians, obviously, but age hasn’t exactly set them back. Sean Connery has been said to still have strong sexual appeal for some, and I’ve met women who would “totally do” Connery. Or even Patrick Stewart. Or Bruce Willis.
Now, ask young men about, say, Donatella Versace. Or Dolly Parton. Betty White. Cher. Carrie Fischer (GRHS) BEFORE taking on the new Star Wars film...heck, who am I kidding? Even IN the new films—and you can label me a blasphemer if you want, but young guys aren’t gonna look at her the same way we did in the Jabba scenes. Even Carrie was well aware of the change and accepted it. Or—let’s take this one more step—how about Kelly Clarkson? She’s only 35 with nothing to rely on but her pure talent. Nothing to be ashamed of, but excellent example of what I mean. Nature slapped her down early.
There are a few women who can pull off that whole “seasoned” look i’m talking about with men. I would totally do Diane Keaton. Meg Ryan, although she’s borderline IMO and could make a huge improvement by growing her hair out just a little. Katherine Kelly Lang, who I’m a HUGE fan of. But these are largely exceptional and we’re talking freakin’ celebrities with all the makeup. It doesn’t get any better as you move outwards from Hollywood.
The older celebrity women who you view as having sex appeal are the exception but the older celebrity men who you view as having sex appeal are not? Perhaps from your position as a heterosexual male but as a heterosexual male you are not more qualified as to the perspectives of a heterosexual female than a heterosexual female.
Like it or not, the vast majority of 18-21 year olds are likely going to feel uneasy being propositioned by men in their 30s, and creeped out by being propositioned by men over 40.
You just listed a number of older women who you claim to find attractive...you just said you would "totally do" Diane Keaton.
Ummmmm...ok? I’m not talking about purely sexual attractiveness. I’m talking about beauty in general. You’re making the assumption that I’m talking about older people that someone would want to date or have sex with. I never said anyone was “propositioning” anyone.
This is really quite simple. Are young women more likely to say a man at a certain age is handsome than young men to say a woman of comparable age is beautiful?
Also, I do not appreciate your cis male shaming tactics here. That borders on bullying and I thought you were better than that.
Pointing out that a person who is not a member of a demographic cannot understand the perspectives and experiences of that demographic better than actual members of that demographic is not shaming. It's reality.
As a cis male, you will never have the same level of authority on cis female perspectives as cis females, because you are not a cis female, you do not experience life as a cis female, you are not related to as a cis female, and your thoughts and perspectives do not originate from the mind of a cis female. Everything you know on how cis females think, feel, and perceive as a cis female, you must obtain by extrinsic means...being told, observation, and your own reasoning and deduction, but never from an emic perspective. Likewise I cannot claim the authority of a cis male on things pertaining to the perspectives of cis males. Everything I know on the perspectives and desires of cis males comes from studies, my own observations, reasoning and deductions, and most importantly, heeding of the word of cis males themselves. If my own conclusions on the matter bwgin to conflict with the testimonials of cis males, then I must abandon them in favor of that from the source. An overwhelming cohort of adult cis males have voiced a preference for younger rather than older women. Who is a cis female to assert otherwise?
Aesthetics is subjective among women. Have you noticed how women will call an article of clothing "cute"? They don't mean cute like puppies and kittens. They mean it's acceptable and might look good on the right person with in the right outfit, with the right shoes.
The concept of aesthetics becomes a multidimensional object with time, place, application, situation, relevance and so on taken in to account.
Sean Connery is hansdome...asterisk.
*He is handsome...for an old man.
You don't look fat in those jeans....asterisk.
*You don't look fatter than the 300lbs that you are in those jeans.
What a cute baby....asterisk.
*What an ugly little mofo, but it's a baby, which is part of the definition of cute.
If you want to know if a woman would date someone, you will get more of a conclusive answer asking directly, because her claiming she finds someone good looking doesn't imply she would date them or even be open to a romantic or sexual relationship with them.
You need objective evidence because you lack an emic perspective and the wealth of information bestowed by that emic perspective. Everyone is entitled to their opinions but on the subject of the perspectives held by a particular demographic, the opinions of someone outside of that demographic do not hold authority over the actual perspectives of the members of that demographic.
I just read this as a statement of fact, that one sex is not in a better position to view things than the other. That both views are valid. I find 'if in doubt, take it literally' works well on here when I think someones being offensive.
If true, then why point out that I’m a heterosexual male AT ALL? Saying I’m “not more qualified” solely on the basis that I’m a cis hetero male is entirely unnecessary. Chronos, if I am to give her the benefit of the doubt, might not have intended any offense. But sadly, that is the world we live in. That statement was deeply offensive, and similar statements very often are PURPOSEFULLY offensive.
I do not claim or pretend to speak for all women. I speak for what I observe in real life. I’m an inquisitive person and find the subject fascinating. I do not believe I’m always right about everything. I don’t feel compelled to prove I’m right about anything.
But I WILL NOT stand idly by while someone uses shaming language on the basis of my gender or orientation. Disagree with me? Fine. We can keep civil counterpoint going all day if I have the time for it. Even if I think you’re wrong, I will still respect that you sincerely believe what you say. Bringing gender into this is going too far. It is inappropriate, and if Chronos is unaware that it is inappropriate, perhaps now is the time for her to become aware of that.
I would never condescend to tell a woman she couldn’t possibly understand men’s issues based purely on the fact she’s a woman. I’m offended by the implication that I can’t relate anything I’ve heard women say JUST BECAUSE I’m a man, hence I’m “not...qualified.” That IS shaming. Supposing I take it literally...hello??? Exactly what other conclusions am I supposed to draw from that “literal” statement???
That not more means not more, she didn't say your view was worth less, she said it wasn't worth more. If you mean she was implying something else, I wouldn't know because I can't pick up that kind of thing .
I don’t hate Chronos and it might have been an honest mistake. Maybe I haven’t read enough posts from her, but it struck me as so unusual to the point I had to read the comment AGAIN and then I wondered if her account had been hacked and someone was trolling me.
As I said, if we merely disagreed, I could respect that. If she meant what you said she meant, and you might be right, then it shouldn’t matter if I’m a hetero male, female, or a bisexual trans hermaphrodite unicorn that poops rainbow frozen yogurt. It shouldn’t even have entered the conversation. But SHE brought gender into the conversation when she insinuated that my views are problematic on the basis of my gender. I don’t mean the content of the discussion, I just mean attacking the validity of my views based on being a straight man. Attacking my views is not an assault on me. Trying to invalidate my views by bringing up my being a straight man IS such an attack.
I’ve never had any beef with Chronos before and if she doesn’t apologize now I won’t hold it against her. Simply not having it happen again will suffice and we shall speak no more of it. So unless it comes up again I have no more to say. Consider it dropped.
I think it's ludicrous that you expect me to apologize for pointing out that your opinions on cis female perspectives and experiences don't supercede actual cis female perspectives and experiences.
I highly recommend that you take in to account positional context.
Some May-December romances DO work.
My father is 25 years older than his present wife---and they celebrated their 30th anniversary last year. They met when he was in his late 40's, and she was in her early 20's.
The lady owns her own company, and has owned it since at least the 1980s. She's done well, despite possibly having dyslexia. She's a very independent, assertive woman who doesn't take any crap.
ZZZTired
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Joined: 23 Jan 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 476
Location: Awake from a good night's rest
What?
Last edited by ZZZTired on 22 Feb 2018, 9:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.
And if the older male has the same or less life experience?
AngelRho
Veteran
Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,366
Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile
I just read this as a statement of fact, that one sex is not in a better position to view things than the other. That both views are valid. I find 'if in doubt, take it literally' works well on here when I think someones being offensive.
If true, then why point out that I’m a heterosexual male AT ALL? Saying I’m “not more qualified” solely on the basis that I’m a cis hetero male is entirely unnecessary. Chronos, if I am to give her the benefit of the doubt, might not have intended any offense. But sadly, that is the world we live in. That statement was deeply offensive, and similar statements very often are PURPOSEFULLY offensive.
I do not claim or pretend to speak for all women. I speak for what I observe in real life. I’m an inquisitive person and find the subject fascinating. I do not believe I’m always right about everything. I don’t feel compelled to prove I’m right about anything.
But I WILL NOT stand idly by while someone uses shaming language on the basis of my gender or orientation. Disagree with me? Fine. We can keep civil counterpoint going all day if I have the time for it. Even if I think you’re wrong, I will still respect that you sincerely believe what you say. Bringing gender into this is going too far. It is inappropriate, and if Chronos is unaware that it is inappropriate, perhaps now is the time for her to become aware of that.
I would never condescend to tell a woman she couldn’t possibly understand men’s issues based purely on the fact she’s a woman. I’m offended by the implication that I can’t relate anything I’ve heard women say JUST BECAUSE I’m a man, hence I’m “not...qualified.” That IS shaming. Supposing I take it literally...hello??? Exactly what other conclusions am I supposed to draw from that “literal” statement???
That not more means not more, she didn't say your view was worth less, she said it wasn't worth more. If you mean she was implying something else, I wouldn't know because I can't pick up that kind of thing .
I don’t hate Chronos and it might have been an honest mistake. Maybe I haven’t read enough posts from her, but it struck me as so unusual to the point I had to read the comment AGAIN and then I wondered if her account had been hacked and someone was trolling me.
As I said, if we merely disagreed, I could respect that. If she meant what you said she meant, and you might be right, then it shouldn’t matter if I’m a hetero male, female, or a bisexual trans hermaphrodite unicorn that poops rainbow frozen yogurt. It shouldn’t even have entered the conversation. But SHE brought gender into the conversation when she insinuated that my views are problematic on the basis of my gender. I don’t mean the content of the discussion, I just mean attacking the validity of my views based on being a straight man. Attacking my views is not an assault on me. Trying to invalidate my views by bringing up my being a straight man IS such an attack.
I’ve never had any beef with Chronos before and if she doesn’t apologize now I won’t hold it against her. Simply not having it happen again will suffice and we shall speak no more of it. So unless it comes up again I have no more to say. Consider it dropped.
I think it's ludicrous that you expect me to apologize for pointing out that your opinions on cis female perspectives and experiences don't supercede actual cis female perspectives and experiences.
I highly recommend that you take in to account positional context.
I didn’t expect any actual apologies and never asked because I’d much rather give you the chance to save face than place any demands on you. I believe I already explained that I’m not trying to nor ever wished to “supersede” anything, as you put it. Yet you continue to insult me on the sole basis that I am male, as though simply by being male my experiences aren’t valid at all: Neither what I’ve observed nor what younger women themselves have outright told me. Now, if you insist on going there, let me remind you that you don’t speak for all women, either.
We’re done here. There is NO REASON WHATSOEVER for you to behave uncivilly towards me. I’ve done nothing to you. Perhaps in a day or so you can calm down and we can try again on friendlier terms, but enough is enough.
my ex-boyfriend was older than me. i was 22 years old and he was 30, he was a bit immature for his age in some aspects but so am I, and i think everyone is... this whole maturity thing is less objective than we often think.
the age gap wasn't a point for us, but i would find a bit creepy if the point of me being younger was the main fact of his attraction to me. i guess you should try to see girls beyond their age, or just minimize it, because it can scare them.
try to break your interest in this age-group girls to understand what really attracts you – is the care-free? less experience? playfulness? so focus on this things. if it's purely the age, i would suggest re-thinking it.
Last edited by ltcvnzl on 22 Feb 2018, 8:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I just read this as a statement of fact, that one sex is not in a better position to view things than the other. That both views are valid. I find 'if in doubt, take it literally' works well on here when I think someones being offensive.
If true, then why point out that I’m a heterosexual male AT ALL? Saying I’m “not more qualified” solely on the basis that I’m a cis hetero male is entirely unnecessary. Chronos, if I am to give her the benefit of the doubt, might not have intended any offense. But sadly, that is the world we live in. That statement was deeply offensive, and similar statements very often are PURPOSEFULLY offensive.
I do not claim or pretend to speak for all women. I speak for what I observe in real life. I’m an inquisitive person and find the subject fascinating. I do not believe I’m always right about everything. I don’t feel compelled to prove I’m right about anything.
But I WILL NOT stand idly by while someone uses shaming language on the basis of my gender or orientation. Disagree with me? Fine. We can keep civil counterpoint going all day if I have the time for it. Even if I think you’re wrong, I will still respect that you sincerely believe what you say. Bringing gender into this is going too far. It is inappropriate, and if Chronos is unaware that it is inappropriate, perhaps now is the time for her to become aware of that.
I would never condescend to tell a woman she couldn’t possibly understand men’s issues based purely on the fact she’s a woman. I’m offended by the implication that I can’t relate anything I’ve heard women say JUST BECAUSE I’m a man, hence I’m “not...qualified.” That IS shaming. Supposing I take it literally...hello??? Exactly what other conclusions am I supposed to draw from that “literal” statement???
That not more means not more, she didn't say your view was worth less, she said it wasn't worth more. If you mean she was implying something else, I wouldn't know because I can't pick up that kind of thing .
I don’t hate Chronos and it might have been an honest mistake. Maybe I haven’t read enough posts from her, but it struck me as so unusual to the point I had to read the comment AGAIN and then I wondered if her account had been hacked and someone was trolling me.
As I said, if we merely disagreed, I could respect that. If she meant what you said she meant, and you might be right, then it shouldn’t matter if I’m a hetero male, female, or a bisexual trans hermaphrodite unicorn that poops rainbow frozen yogurt. It shouldn’t even have entered the conversation. But SHE brought gender into the conversation when she insinuated that my views are problematic on the basis of my gender. I don’t mean the content of the discussion, I just mean attacking the validity of my views based on being a straight man. Attacking my views is not an assault on me. Trying to invalidate my views by bringing up my being a straight man IS such an attack.
I’ve never had any beef with Chronos before and if she doesn’t apologize now I won’t hold it against her. Simply not having it happen again will suffice and we shall speak no more of it. So unless it comes up again I have no more to say. Consider it dropped.
I think it's ludicrous that you expect me to apologize for pointing out that your opinions on cis female perspectives and experiences don't supercede actual cis female perspectives and experiences.
I highly recommend that you take in to account positional context.
I didn’t expect any actual apologies and never asked because I’d much rather give you the chance to save face than place any demands on you. I believe I already explained that I’m not trying to nor ever wished to “supersede” anything, as you put it. Yet you continue to insult me on the sole basis that I am male, as though simply by being male my experiences aren’t valid at all: Neither what I’ve observed nor what younger women themselves have outright told me. Now, if you insist on going there, let me remind you that you don’t speak for all women, either.
We’re done here. There is NO REASON WHATSOEVER for you to behave uncivilly towards me. I’ve done nothing to you. Perhaps in a day or so you can calm down and we can try again on friendlier terms, but enough is enough.
If you find the mentioning that you are male in the context of a conversation about male and female perspectives insulting, then I would be at a loss as to how to discuss the subject in ernest with you.
It's true I don't speak for all women. But I can speak for at least one, and that is more than someone who is not a woman can speak for.
In any case, I am not uncalm. If there is someone in this conversation who has lost their composure it would have to be you, and if not, then I don't see why anyone would need a cool down period.
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