Speaking without "emotion"

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I know this may seem like a stupid question, but I have no idea how to speak without emotion.

I admit I am having problems communicating with my boyfriend, as everything seems emotional to him. I am NT and he has AS. I feel like I dont know how to speak any other way, or what buzzwords or tones are giving off the emotional impression. For the vast majority of time I feel almost blind to socializing- I dont really know how to do it. My mind is literally blank. I dont think he believes me when I say that, but I dont know any other way to explain this state. I often feel very confused as to what to say, do, etc. I realize I need to talk to him calmly, but what are some examples of speaking with little emotion, so I won't come as sensitive or touchy? What are some ways of communicating that you are involved in with your mate?

Does this even make any sense to anyone? I'm having tranfering it from my thoughts.

Try switching into a totally logical state, as though you are observing rather than participating (the 'anthropologist approach').

You could also approach emotional topics as though you are talking to someone you don't know very well. It will help you be more objective.

Are you sure you're really NT ?

To begin with:

Write it down and give it to him in the form of a letter. GET TO THE POINT on the letter, do not put simply type what you would be saying to him face to face.

To prepare the letter:

Make a list of the objectives. What is it you want to tell him? Write it down in one sentence, no bigger.

Once you have ID'd your objectives, write the letter as if it were a thesis for college.


Then give him the letter in person and be with him as he reads it. Be sure to tell him why you're giving him a letter

that is:

"but I dont know any other way to explain this state. I often feel very confused as to what to say, do, etc. I realize I need to talk to him calmly, but what are some examples of speaking with little emotion, so I won't come as sensitive or touchy?"

otherwise he might over-analyze the gesture and think you're treating him like if he didnt have the mental capacity to understand you. Be sure to let him know this is just a first step.

Once he reads the letter he will know you are trying and that you're THERE face to face not simply dropping the letter and walking away.

At this point both of you will be at the same playing field and can go forward with the verbal.

Its ironic really but its like if you were both people with AS .. just opposite ends of the spectrum .

And if he doesnt ask you to marry him by the end of the week, kindly slap him for me. repeatedly.