A sucessful aspie being mean to his friends.

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Over this past weekend, I got together with three friends and went to see the movie Twilight. Of the three, one of them is a guy who has a full-time job, his own car, moving out on his own. However, he is letting his ego get too high and is getting mean towards his friends. For one thing, I would often call him on the phone and let him know that we were having get togthers but never called me back. Anyway, we all got together at the movies and he wanted to see another movie but had a fit as he go stuck watching twilight. Infact, he had a hissy fit and left right after the movie abruptly, pouting like a 15-year-old. In response, I e-mailed him and told him that I was not impressed with the way he acted and not to come if he wasn't good and let us know by calling.

Unfortunately, he wrote back and was being a smart alec and saying that he was mentally ill and will stay out of everyone's lives so that he doesn't ruin them. After that he wrote, thanks for the letter b*&$%% signed dumb ass.

What do I do?

He's emo.

That is, his only way of dealing with people is to hold them as emotional hostages - and to manipulate them with guilt, to punish them with depression, and to reward them with silence.

Ignore him, forget him, you're better of without him.

That's a really good point and I would have never thought of that. See, he gets mad if he doesn't get his way. For example, if he wants to go see a movie that no one else wants to see, then he gets really quiet and goes to another movie and then pouts and takes off with an attitude. He also told me to be quiet when I was trying to whisper something to a friend which happened to be during the previews, I might add. He also got mad when I confronted him but he never has taken it to this level and called me names like that and made me feel bad for confronting him.

Sounds like he needs to grow up.

I agree with Fnord -- you're better off without him.

It does sound like he's being kind of a jerk. Then again, you WERE going to see Twilight.

Seriously though, before you give up on him, tell him, as gently as you can, that he does jerky things, and those things make it hard to be his friend. This is probably better as an email than a verbal exchange. Chances are, he doesn't even realize he acts badly. With the right motivation, he might try harder.

oh, wow! I have a job and live on my own so I am a sucessful Aspie!!

wooopee!

Merle

Well, I am very happy for him and you too. However, he is sticking his nose in the air and suddenly thinks he's hot stuff and that he can be an NT. Not only that, he's 33 years old and is acting like a pouty teenager and it is driving me nuts. I mean, he needs to grow up.

He didn't used to act like that as he used to be a lot nicer and more giving towards his friends. Within the last year though, he has been getting an attitude towards his friends and even becoming more distant and full of himself. Moreover, if things do not go his way, then he pouts like a teenager. For him, it's my way or the highway.

I don't know what to say, other than if he continues behaving like that, he's going to be running out of friends.

I am sorry and I won't call him that. However, I'll call him a 33 year old drama queen as he is being one. Infact, my other friend suggested to me to not contact him anymore and I think I agree with that. She also feels like he answers yes to my evites but doesn't treat anyone very nice and sits around pouting like a baby if things aren't his way.

And what if you exchanged "drama queen" with n****r etc. ?

Seriously though, he probably doesn't even realise he is being a dick. I think this can be a symptom for some severe aspies. For instance, my brother who is more aspie than I am often does similar things. It would be totally like my brother to think that all the people wanting to see a different film from the one he want to see are selfish. Even though there may be 5 of them and 1 of him, he would genuinely think that all 5 of them are selfish bastards for not wanting to go to the film he tells them to.