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nansnick
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16 Dec 2009, 11:37 am

FeralAspie wrote:
Natmega749 wrote:
Whisper wrote:
I have the opposite.. I tend to be over-apologetic! I think it's a habit of overcompensating for my poor social skills.


I can identify with this, Whisper, naturally we're inclined to treat any friends like gold in order to keep them so we'd bend over backwards to to accommodate them; I know I do, hence I never stop worrying about something I either might've done or done if I feel like matters could come to a head.


This is exactly me. I know my wife and kids find it annoying.


Yeah, I apologize more where it's not needed than where it is.

My fear of apologizing is that there will be further scrutiny. It's one thing to sincerely apologize and have someone respect that you understand why an apology is needed and another to apologize and have the person sit there and continue to say why you screwed up or why you should have done something differently. Sometimes in these situations it feels as if the other person needs to apologize for not understanding that you understand or not accepting the apology when it is humbly sincere.


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LuxoJr
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20 Dec 2009, 8:36 pm

I only say sorry when I am not sorry, and when I am forced to say sorry.
When I am sorry I say nothing, because I am so used to saying it when I don't mean it, and I won't be sorry anymore if I say it.
Also, sometimes I, like some of said, am forced to say it.
See I never know when it is proper to say it so I rarely do anymore


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TheDuck
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20 Dec 2009, 8:45 pm

I always apologize for small things like bumping into people (happens a lot) but I have a hard time for more serious things or if I hurt someone seriously. (like closing a car door on someone)



koliver
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10 Jan 2012, 12:54 pm

Yes I do! I find apologizing unnatural--but my husband REALLY has a hard time apologizing. He and I had a little incident about apologizing a few weeks ago and he finally explained why it was so unnatural to him. He feels like he shouldn't have to apologize to someone who trusts his intentions.



I think of apologizing as just helpful social currency. In general it's worth it for me to apologize.



Bun
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10 Jan 2012, 1:05 pm

I don't have a problem with it. I fake an apology if I have to, which is just as bad.



Taylor1002
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23 Jan 2012, 12:48 pm

FeralAspie wrote:
Natmega749 wrote:
Whisper wrote:
I have the opposite.. I tend to be over-apologetic! I think it's a habit of overcompensating for my poor social skills.


I can identify with this, Whisper, naturally we're inclined to treat any friends like gold in order to keep them so we'd bend over backwards to to accommodate them; I know I do, hence I never stop worrying about something I either might've done or done if I feel like matters could come to a head.


This is exactly me. I know my wife and kids find it annoying.


I'm like that too.



League_Girl
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23 Jan 2012, 1:49 pm

Most of the time yes and sometimes I don't have any trouble at all. I used to be over apologetic but people were getting annoyed with it so I cut back. I still apologize when I bump into people or when I hit people's feet with my stroller.



Last edited by League_Girl on 23 Jan 2012, 2:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

CaptainTrips222
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23 Jan 2012, 2:17 pm

I never apologize. Even when it's my fault, no matter how big or small, I blame the other person. If I'm looking down and I bump into someone in public, I turn at them and immediately tell them that it's their fault.














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Zhane
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23 Jan 2012, 7:39 pm

[quote="raisedbyignorance"]...even in severe situations where you know it's your fault?

Yeah! Even when the person gives me an open chance to fess up. I figure if you know already what are you waiting for. Then later (much later) I feel bad and end up saying sorry.



minervx
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24 Jan 2012, 1:16 am

i try to apologize sincerely and promptly without begging or supplicating.



NicoleG
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25 Jan 2012, 1:56 pm

amazon_television wrote:
Although if I do something out of line that I don't catch at the time and someone tells me later that somebody was offended, I have big time problems approaching and repairing the situation after the fact. Thankfully though this doesn't happen very often.


Same here. I get a rush of feelings. I'm horribly embarrassed, upset with myself for screwing up again, upset with the person that was offended for not coming to tell me themselves and instead I find out through the gossip ring, and sometimes upset that the other person for getting offended and for not understanding that I (most likely) didn't mean it like that (whatever it was).

I had one person that did come to tell me himself that I offended him, but I just froze and ran off to ask another person what to do and how to handle it. That second person made me feel so much worse for not knowing how to take care of the situation. I went back and apologized to him, and everything was fine, but I felt like such an absolute heel.



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25 Jan 2012, 4:06 pm

Personally I don't apologize a lot because I don't think I have done anything wrong in MY situation, but if everyone starts to think the opposite of what I think, then I could throw out a fake apology.

Freedom of speech exists, but not on this planet I'm afraid.

We are programmed to have the same opinions, do the same things, wear the same stuff, live the same lives.

There is no place for uniqueness in this world, I'm talking about true uniqueness, being unique in everything.



Sagroth
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26 Jan 2012, 2:26 am

I actually tend to over-apologize. But on the other hand, I am very good at holding a grudge when genuinely wronged and not apologized to.


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