cant get a girlfriend.

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@hale_bopp

i admire your wisdom and dedication in these forums. i sort of just noticed today that i'll be reading a post and thinking how good and useful it is, and hey, it's by hale_bopp.

Yes, the TS is still young at 15, and of course it isn't the end of the world if you can't find a GF at that age. One of the biggest mistakes that adults make, however, is to underestimate, firstly, the anguish and emotional pain that this can cause in a teenage boy on the brink of manhood, and, secondly, the importance of having enough experience with and exposure to the opposite sex when life is still (relatively) carefree. For, the older one becomes, the higher the stakes seem to be. I didn't date at all during high school, because no one way interested in me, and now I'm sort of clueless when it comes to interacting with women. Unfortunately, there's no easy solution to this, although I'd wish to suggest to divert your immediate attention away from getting a GF, and first to just establish nothing but friendship with some girls your age. If you can do that, a lot will already be gained, since women won't be entirely alien to you anymore.

The best of luck, my friend.

Some people will tell you that long hair is not "in" so you won't get a girlfriend with long hair. This isn't true. Whether or not short hair may help is another question, and my first guess would be yes but I don't think the correlation between having shorter hair and getting female attention. I remember having my hair cut short just before second year in college, thinking "maybe I'll get more attention from women now" and nope, nada. I suspect that women who like long hair generally aren't totally put off by short hair like some women are put off by long hair, though. Long hair is more divisive, more polarising. I like the feel of it on me though, so it's still long.

That said, you really have to get over your fear of haircuts. I was afraid too, and used to have crying fits up to the age of 11-12 over having my hair "tugged" particularly when it was washed. I still tense up whenever I'm having my hair washed but I'm glad I got over this hurdle. Even if your hair is long and well-maintained, without a haircut it will eventually be uneven which is something that women tend to notice more than men. Hairdressers can be useful just to even out your hair, without having to cut it short.

So go to a proper hairdresser, as opposed to a barber, who you are reliably informed is considerate. The first time I had my hair washed without totally freaking out was from a young woman who was particularly gentle. I think you should prioritise confronting this issue before most other things - you don't have to have it cut short, as I've said, but have something done.

Push yourself to talk. It doesn't matter what you talk about. If you screw up, who cares. Even if you mess up you will still be learning how to talk to girls, so it's not a waste. Trust me I just recently have been able to talk to attractive girls without being nervous, because well I got tired of it. Just push yourself to talk. The reason I don't have a gf now, is not because I don't talk, but because I don't drive. All the girls around here (Baltimore) care about is getting drunk and smoking. I can not relate to them.