immersion into the culture

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in my entire life (all 18 years of it) i have only been to a gay bar once, and...yeah thats it

m missing somethng though, because i hear through my frends that they really enjoy the gay culture even though there not gay, but, from what have experienced its.....eh...

or am i just not trying hard enough, or looking in the wrong places?

I didn't have any real experience with gay culture until I started college, when I went to my first Gay Pride parade. Let me tell you that the gay culture is not for everyone, and if you find that you don't care for it, then it's no big deal. I didn't really enjoy the Pride parade I went to, mainly because there were too many people there and I felt claustrophobic.

I'm currently a member of my college campus's Gay-Straight Alliance. There really aren't that many people attending meetings, and I find it to be more relaxing. I've met some really nice and interesting people since joining the GSA.

I have yet to go to a gay bar, so I guess I could try that out, because bars tend to have more relaxing atmospheres than parades. And it's true that some straight people are somewhat into the gay scene. I remember one of my straight college professors talking about how she had frequented gay bars in the past.

going to such an establishment is appropriate only if one has a reasonable expectation of having a good time. but i hated the music, i hated the general vibe 'cept for the nude dancers and the porn vids on the big screen. but ultimately i always entered alone and departed more alone. when i was younger and prettier, i was made aware of the feeling, of being seen as a piece of meat and nothing more. at least the dancers were getting reasonably well-paid for being seen as meat.

Gay bars and parades are, perhaps, the most visible social components of the gay community, but they do not represent the sum total of gay culture.

I would say that the short answer to your question is you're looking in the wrong place.

The real question, though, is to find out what the right place would be. And that will depend very much on the types of things that you like to do, and the social skills that you have.

That was my feeling as well. If someone's into that, more power to them, but I'm not. I'm sure every place is different, but there was far too much touching in the places I've been to. For someone who doesn't like to be touched, that was very not cool. When I complained about this afterwards, people told me I should expect that and shouldn't go to them if I didn't like it.
I'm not into any culture anyway. It's just not me.

If straight people go to them, are they still gay bars?

if sinners go to heaven, is heaven still heaven?

I have no real experience with gay culture, but from what everyone says here I agree--not interested. I have no desire to go to a gay bar (or any bar really, but I'll probably get dragged into one by friends at some point). The university I'm going to next year has an LGBT Association and I might join that though (although I should probably get around to telling people I'm gay first. [Sight]...I hate talking about my feelings to people--still nothing to complain about, because I come from a tolerant family). I'll just have to see.

Separate is never equal.

IMHO, gay bars tend to be loud, crowded, and have a meat-market atmosphere. There ARE exceptions, places where you can just hang out, play some pool, and be mellow. You might look for a gay sports club (my Rainbow Volleyball Team was the BEST!), gay book club, a gay religious studies group, or (if you're interested in exploring your kinky side) a BDSM group. I find those kinds of group are more focused and structured, and therefore less stressful.