Why are Chinese people so much friendlier than Japanese?

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Amebix
Toucan
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16 Sep 2016, 12:53 pm

In my experience both are friendly, but as a culture, Japanese people tend to be more reserved. Often you have to approach Japanese people before they will approach you. I find that both Japanese and Chinese people tend to be very interested in westerners, but Chinese especially so because China hasn't had quite as much exposure in recent decades as Japan. As someone said, Japanese people tend to be a bit more worldly, likely because Japan has been such a developed nation for so long. Because of that, I think Japanese people expect foreigners to have more understanding and respect for their culture than Chinese people, just as, say, French people would. For example, I can't speak any Japanese but I have a close friend who is almost fluent and teaches English over there, and when I traveled through Japan with him I got a much warmer reception than when I traveled alone (though people were generally very friendly and helpful in both situations). Chinese can be more forgiving of others' ignorance because they're eager to go out and meet people from around the world. Remember that China hasn't been an open society for that long. In many places Chinese tourists have a very bad reputation, and I've read that this is really probably because most Chinese tourists are middle aged... elderly Chinese tend to be sophisticated because they were raised with traditional Chinese culture and values, and the young tend to be very sophisticated because they tend to be well-educated, worldly, and have a more global understanding of issues. Middle aged Chinese people, on the other hand, are the generation of Maoism and the red guard, meaning they lack both the traditional Chinese roots of their parents and the education and technology of their children, meaning they're much less understanding of the world around them than the generations above and below them. Chinese culture and economy have sort of had to hit the reset button, whereas Japan has never had such a cultural interruption. This may contribute to Japanese people being less open and eager to share themselves with the rest of the world than China. But besides all that, Japanese culture is one of the most reserved, regimented, and honor-bound in the world.



arthur_arcturus
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30 Sep 2016, 7:08 pm

Japanese people go through hell as children. Parents normally don't hug them. They are regimented through shame (that's what their society is based on). There is massive gossip and group exclusion for people who stick out or behave in an overly expressive way. It's a very merciless system going on behind the cuteness and fake politeness. They are emotional bonsais basically. There are exceptions: Japanese who move abroad (or who have lived abroad for a long time). Old people (old people in Japan are very friendly). And people from poor backgrounds/the countryside. And generally exceptional people exist everywhere in very minute amounts.

Chinese on the other hand used to be extremely poor and with nothing else to do in life and based everything on personal connections, finding a boyfriend/girlfriend and so on. They are also very unsophisticated for the most part (i.e. have no idea how they come across so they don't bother trying to camouflage that, which is a good thing imo).

In the past 10 years I have seen a big difference in China, people are no longer that friendly in the big cities the richer they get (still far better than Japan and no change in the countryside or smaller cities).

On the other hand Japanese are great artists, perfectionists, and good workers, whereas good luck doing anything in china. Humans are all flawed, each country in a different way.

Source: speak both Japanese and Mandarin fluently and have lived 6 years in Japan and as many in China.



palmtoka
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12 Oct 2016, 11:04 am

He is courageous to send random non-creepy, non-perverted text messages to 20+ girls who he definitely knows well.
As I am still a coward who knows not a single girl in real life, I would rather send one creepy/perverted message for myself to read and laugh at later. :D

CyclopsSummers wrote:
Speaking as a Chinese-descended person, I'm puzzled as to why a social experiment that's meant to test the 'friendliness' of Chinese vs Japanese people only involves contacting girls.

Am I the only one who finds this problematic?


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citrus_wedge
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21 Nov 2023, 7:10 pm

True. I am Chinese myself, so I might be a little biased, but I love Japan and its innovations...except for their personalities. Sure, respect is very important, but you don't have to be like that to everyone, for example, for many people, it would be unusual for them to bow to strangers. I would say that a blend of the two--respect and charisma would be best for the society to connect and bond with each other, instead of treating each other with so much integrity it often becomes stressful and boring.