New. Dissociative Disorder & Asperger's
I've only ever made a couple of posts here because I'm scared. I'm afraid I will say the wrong thing and will be judged. I want to get these few lines out before I change my mind. My world is miserable right now even though it's moving in the right direction. I'm very lonely and looking to make connections with anyone who understands. Apparently I have been dissociating since I was very young because the trauma of Asperger's. Is there anyone else out there who has an idea what this is like? Even if you don't ... if you could just say hi, so that I could know that someone out there has read something that I produced. That sounds rather desperate and odd, I know. I've got to believe that I can connect in new, healthy ways rather than in all the old coping mechanism unhealthy acting ways.
Hi
It doesn't sound desperate and odd at all to me. I found Wrong Planet because my need to find people who could relate to me. I recently went for an AS eval and came away with AS and an added Co Morbid... they think I have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) with dissociative episodes. I am not so certain about the BPD part.. but the dissociative episodes I am certain of.
I don't know if the dissociative episodes have anything to do with this or not - but I feel like it may... Most my memories, especially ones where I am scared or overwhelmed... They are all 3rd person like watching a movie starring me.
Also I get these periods of time where everything feels slow motion and I am swimming through a thick fog. My visual snow kicks up hugely when this is happening too. Other times it is like I am watching from outside myself.
I hope sharing this with you helps
Welcome to Wrong Planet!
Hello. I hope that seeing these messages will make you feel better and I assure you that you won't face persecution on this site. I can't imagine you would, anyway. If you want, feel free to PM me if you feel that talking would help. I don't really know that much about disassociative but I'd be more than willing to do some research. I probably will later, actually. I understand your feelings and I'm not going to impose upon you to do anything, but I promise that this site is nothing to be afraid of.
quote="zeituni" I've only ever made a couple of posts here because I'm scared. I'm afraid I will say the wrong thing and will be judged. I want to get these few lines out before I change my mind. . Is there anyone else out there who has an idea what this is like?
That sounds rather desperate and odd, I know. I've got to believe that I can connect in new, healthy ways rather than in all the old coping mechanism unhealthy acting ways. [/quote]
trying to follow onto a mature concourse of events. yes i know what you mean and in some ways you are right. but being honest about your feelings from the start doesn't always necessarily encounter a cross -between as and that one you said. cant find the short term name, but i think its more about recognising a trait in you where yes it seems clear to others you're different but how?
and how do they look at you when you speak to them. even from afar. i basically know there are other things than just the unspoken spectrum disorders out there and that sometimes you need to associate with your own identity first before you can be the judge behind it. maybe the case that when you are diagnosed or thrown off course for a while it immediately seems like the end of the world as 'you' know it and that can trigger off a course of abuse from the very start. you begin to neglect your own needs or others and find endless accounts or reasons of how and when the system started and how it got so bad right? excuse me but if im wong towards the issues you have raised on this topic you are welcome to reassess my points in this.
I've experienced dissociation during very stressful events but not on a general basis. I have memory problems though, is that part of it?
This is not my forum, but i will reply to this anyway. when you say something stressfull or say you've experienced the same as someone else , well, its never the same and to put it mildly you do have an inner voice, but you feel that sometimes in response to some things you dont. but its more than that really. i think theres an edge to the pd. if you associate a cost of a trauma to a cost of say not putting the lid back on something i.e stress,. then really that is not it. okay? hope that helps.
Averick
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Joined: 5 Mar 2007
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,709
Location: My tower upon the crag. Yes, mwahahaha!
I've read that this is co-morbid sometimes with AS, which i find interesting.
I had a friend in my early 20's who had this and by a therapist was told to befriend and name her feelings "because they were lumped under different personaes."
Odd though, coincidently I've heard many on this site in the past who state that their feelings are tossed together in a ball-- once they feel anger it pulls on terror, disgust, grief. Perhaps after many occurences of this I think that a compartimentilization happens, sometimes forming a fragmented psyche used for those moments of fight-or-flight, which I think is normal.. Dissociation is a lot like MPD, be careful of those categories and I would be more careful of the Ph D's who use this criteria of diagnosis, many Ph D's think that these are crack-pot theories more-or-less, like a good 85% anyway.
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Light in the absence of eyes illuminates nothing.
Hi
Why was it traumatic for you?
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"I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown." - Woody Allen
black008
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 26 Mar 2013
Age: 47
Gender: Male
Posts: 62
Location: North Carolina, USA
Greetings,
I have Aspergers too. My interaction experiences has been that people only need me when they want away around something. For example, someone wanted me to find out if someone they knew had a criminal record. That is usually how it goes for people wanting to talk to me. If I try to engage other people I have to mimic what I know others are doing around me. So I will give you an example and I will put parenthesis around what I am really thinking.
Me: How are you? (I don't give ****. If you only knew.)
Other: I am doing great... and you.
Me: (Options: If I say great this conversation will be shorter, if I say know this conversation will continue. I choose option A.)
Just busy with work.
Other: That is good. A lot of people don't have jobs right now, we should feel lucky.
Me: (Luck has nothing to do with it. There is a need for my work, if there is not a need then I want find work.) Yes, you are so right.
Other: I have not seen your parents lately. Are they doing good?
Me: (Say yes conversation will be shorter) Yes they are. No health problems and Dad is still working.
Other: Well, that is wonderful to hear.
Other: Our daughter just got accepted into college.
Me: (D*mn it. I thought I was through with this. Just a little bit longer. Keep your composure. Options: I could say oh really which school or say will that is wonderful, you should be very proud. This could continue the conversation of how proud they are and give me a long a list of which she had to do to get in there or Well, that is great news. Option 3)
Well, that is great news.
Other: Oh, there is Cindy over there, I need to see her for a minute. Good talking with you.
Me: (Finally) and you too.
Analysis: Before my Asperger diagnoses I thought I had something wrong with me. Now I know I am different but not wrong. Think of it as a machine, I am a Ferrari most people are Chevrolets. We (you and me) are not going to be able to understand their lifestyle. So, I have realized that I need to be with people who drive Ferrari's (Aspergers and Autistic type people.) And let me tell you I feel comfortable here and that people understand me and vica versa. I would suggest you keep asking questions here on the forum and know we are our own people and you are not alone. Live long and prosper.
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?Because some men aren?t looking for anything logical, like money. They can?t be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.? Alfred Pennyworth
nick007
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Joined: 4 May 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,129
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in the police state called USA
I dissociated some as a kid & teen because my Aspergers & other issues made it extremely hard for me to connect with anyone. I had a psychotic depression when I was 20 partly related to all that stuff.
I know it can be hard to post personal stuff on a big forum like this but a majority of the regular posters are pretty kewl & try to be supportive & help if they can. Some people can be jerks here unfortunately(it may be due to their frustration over their down issues) it's best to ignore them. You can also lurk awhile & get a better feel of the site & members before you get to posting alot.
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https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition
Hi, I know what its like and I wanted to let you know that I read your words. I have been recently diagnosed with many things, and a disssociative disorder is one of them. I have done this since I was a small child due to trauma and just being downright different then everyone else. I didn't know about having autism until very recently. I can relate to what you said.
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Faye
AQ: 40
Aspie: 180
NT: 44
MBTI: INTP
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