Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

Could this guy have Aspergers? Does he hate me or like me?

Page 1 of 2 [ 17 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Mirta
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 20 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 30

26 Feb 2016, 6:14 pm

rdos wrote:
Mirta wrote:
Quote:
A few times I've also tried to start up a conversation with him but it's very weird and leaves me feeling puzzled. If I say something he usually does an awkward laugh and then answers me in the shortest sentence possible, even one word answers. But he doesn't follow it up with a question to me the way one normally does when making small talk, or just having a regular conversation. Instead there is always an awkward silence that sort of kills it. He tends to sound sort of formal when he talks.


I can totally relate to that, people tell me that very often and it's one of the reasons my last date went awkward. So I'd say it's possible he's on the spectrum. Now, I don't know him, so it's very difficult to say like that if he is.


People shouldn't be awkward about silence. If you are neurodiverse yourself, you absolutely should not be awkward with that, and if the other person is neurodiverse as well then it's normal and healthy.

BTW, the original post in a good way describes how the neurodiverse eye-contact game works. I'd say that going up talking and expecting functional small-talk in that context is very likely to fail. People that do that are breaking the rules, IMHO.


I agree with you. And I would actually like to know why people are so awkward about silence and feel so uncomfortable because we're not talking every second, like if we were doing something creepy or what. Why is it?



swfjvh
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 15 Oct 2012
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 19
Location: Belgium

04 Mar 2016, 3:35 pm

I can relate to pretty much all of this.
And i know that it can be seen as 'creepy'. :oops: :roll:
Although, i don't know what to do... :(

I returned to school after i resigned work and i'm studying nursing at the moment.
Advantage, direction with lots more girls than boys.
Disadvantage, if you don't know what to do, there might be 1000 girls, nothing will happen.

Ehm, i don't know if this might be helpfull but i can tell you that this kind of behavior can be part of an ASD.
The point is that, even if it might be 'creepy', my intentions are genuinly good.

The only thing i would like at the moment is just someone i can give a hug but it's so frustrating not to know how to be able to get to that point... :(


_________________
My apologies if i have written errors in my texts, English is not my native language since i'm Belgian... :-)