What's the last weirdest dream you had?

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Dreamt about watching someone else waste cash on a gym membership

I kept having the same dream interrupted by wakefulness, over and over. its particulars evaporated each time I awoke.

Dreamt about peeling a banana

I discovered that the hood of my coat had a secret pocket.

I dreamt that I was in a large room with 2 other people close to me, 2 guys on either side of me, and a woman sitting next to the tv set on the wall, we were all watching on that tv set, some bourgeois boob expounding on the importance of all of us 99%ers jerking ourselves up by the bootstraps and servicing our economy by buying more stuff, expecially more expensive health insurance so as not to be a drag on the economy, and I said to the other guys, "too bad there is no politically correct word to describe the corporate behavior of this jerk." the woman immediately keyed in to what I said and took umbrage.

There was a man in a suit who was hugging flocks of flamingos in a city. He showed me how to open my arms out and lean into the flock. I did it and the flamingos sort of shivered and it felt lovely. I asked the man if he ever ate them and he said " no, that would be bad karma"

Dreamt that a professional came on the bus to watch passengers ride the bus

^^^Bus-
To dream that you are waiting for a bus indicates a temporary setback in achieving your personal goals. If you miss the bus, then it indicates that an aspect of your life is out of control. You need to slow down and map out a new plan. To dream that you are riding a bus implies that you are going along with the crowd. You are lacking originality and control over where your life is taking. To see a bus driver in your dream indicates leadership in some group idea or plan. It is symbolic of collective power. Alternatively, it suggests that you are going around in circles and showing little progress. To dream that you are at a bus stop indicates that there is a decision that you need to make. You need to decide what you want to do with your future. To see a professional/businessperson represents the rational and organized aspect of yourself. To dream that you are a passenger suggests that you are not in control of your life. You are letting others decide for you. To see other passengers in your dream indicates that you are spending too much energy pleasing others. Perhaps, you feel that others have been leeching off of you. The Professional is that aspect of yourself that is trying to get a handle on this.

I dreamt I was visiting a mall in the future and there was this VR center which everyone liked. Only some people never left there. It was a eugenics facility, disguised as a gaming arena. Everyone healthy they let come and go, but anyone they deemed "unfit" was gassed in their VR pod while they played and any family members or friends which showed up were put into a special "waiting room" in which the atmosphere was removed and robots would just scoop up their dehydrated bodies and toss them into an incinerator. I walked quickly away from there, but a woman in a wheel chair was being pushed by a guy into there, I said, "run!" and the guy got angry while the woman tried to walk away from him and the place, then robot sentries started chasing me and when I tried to take the escalator the steps floated and formed a floor. I realized this was a dream then, and materialized a type two phaser and started vaporizing all the robots and I burned the eugenics facility to the ground.

So most nights my dreams are vivid technicolour, largely coherent and quite tiring. Most nights they're weird enough that I'll think about them throughout the day and often for days afterwards. Picking this one as last weirdest because I don't think I'll ever forget it (happened about 3 years ago).

Floating on my back on a lake in Delhi. Very serene. A platypus is floating, on his back, towards me. He stops as he's drifting close to me, and we go on to have a really interesting philosophical conversation, as if it's the most normal thing ever. He ended up saying something really profound to me (which I've now sadly forgotten).

^^^^Platypus
To see a platypus in your dream suggests your tendency to wallow and dwell on your emotions. It may also suggest that your repressed thoughts and subconscious material are slowly coming to the surface and making their presence known. Alternatively, it is indicative of shyness and reservation, especially in social situations.
Lake
To see a lake in your dream signifies your emotional state of mind. You feel restricted and that you can't express your emotions freely. Alternatively, the lake may provide you with solace, security, and peace of mind. If the lake is clear and calm, then it symbolizes your inner peace.
Swimming
To dream that you are swimming suggests that you are exploring aspects of your subconscious mind and emotions. The dream may be a sign that you are seeking some sort of emotional support. It is a common dream image for people going through therapy. To dream that you are floating in water suggests that you have a handle on your emotions.

^^^you're welcome

Dreamt that the firefighter showed the aikido instructor a technique

I dreamt I was in some Greek-isle-like place, brilliant blue skies and bright sunshine on a rocky island, turquoise/navy blue and white buildings with blue/gray carpeting inside, I made some lame small talk with the proprietors of a hotel, talking about my time in Vegas a few decades back but they ignored me, and I paid 'em a few coins out of my coin purse full of little change, to take a leak inside their building somewhere but it was all hallways and I accidently barged into somebody's apartment for which I profusely apologized as I backed out. then I went outside and saw a bunch of people in beach clothing lolling about on the rocks overlooking the sea and the surrounding rocky islands of the Greek isles. then I awoke.

i dreamt i was in a college classroom, the professor was bill clinton's old nemesis, linda tripp, appearing as she did in the 90s. 2 young urban black men were discussing the continuing racism in this country and how all white people were complicit, and no sooner did i object to being lumped in with the racists they said, "aw shaddup you nigrel!" and i asked one of them, "what do you mean to say, with the suffix 'rel'?" to which he responded, "mongrel," and then laughed. Linda Tripp was impassive but gave away her disgust at this scene with a subtle shaking of her head. then i awoke.