Mixed messages (again)

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There was this girl at this neighbourhood association thing who came up to me and starting talking to me in a very animated fashion. I thought she must be into me. She kept on smiling, complimenting me, touching me, making innuendo and then winking at me, stuff like that. I said we should "keep in touch" but then she saud she doesn't have enough energy to go out since she was injured in a car crash. I don't get why girls always act like they're into then don't to go out. Maybe I did simething wrong. Maybe I didn't return her affections in the right way because I don't really know how. I think it's the story of my life, some girl is into me and I don't respond imediately and they lose interest.

She said I was an "innocent boy". Maybe that meant she was starting to find me unexciting. I offered her a lift home but maybe that only served to make me look like a Nice Guy™.

There may still be hope for her since I've got her on Facebook but I also have to think about the girl at music group who may or may not be into me and the wealthy geek girl I've been chatting to on OKCupid. Geek girls are nice but I think maybe she just wants to be friends. This game is confusing.

She seems ambivalent---not about you--but in general.

I would stay away from her. I have had enough experience with these "ambivalent" types--they want you one moment, despise you the next. You don't need that bullcrap.

Maybe I should stay away from her. I was thinking of meeting her at this improv theater group thing tonight but maybe I shouldn't (so much for her having "no energy").

I like this geek girl from OKCupid better. She's younger, geekier and much wealthier (not that her wealth should matter but it still sounds bettwr than the other girl, who's on welfaire). She doesn't decribe herself as wealthy but she says she's an oil rig worker and they get paid a lot, right?

She says she likes exchanging "random facts" but so far that's all we've done. Maybe that's all she wants from me.

Depends on what kind of worker, but usually yes. It is very demanding work though - often 2 weeks on, 2 weeks off and can be quite dangerous depending on the job.

One thing I've learned is to never get your hopes up before meeting someone in person. Online you can both profess your love to one another as often as you like, but I've found that once you meet things can change quite quickly.

Now...that would be an interesting girl, indeed! Oil-rig worker! Around my area, they're doing construction, and there's this cute lady construction worker whom I exchange winks with.

You should still go to the "improv" though--especially if you like that sort of thing.

What do you mean "making innuendo and then winking at you"? What would be an example? Sounds way too forward to be genuine flirting, but more like mucking around and trying to get a reaction from you. Maybe you reacted by blushing or looking uncomfortable so that's why she sees you as an "innocent boy".

Don't pursue her. She is patronising you and relationships don't (or at least shouldn't!) start on uneven footing like that. Go to the improv thing tonight if you were going to anyway, but not if you were going just because she is.

I'm not sure if I overstated the innuendo thing. I asked her what she does with her free time and she said she spends a lot of time sleeping [wink].

Any way, she talked about religion a lot. She may expect me to share her faith (I wouldn't join a church even if my soul was at stake).

I agree that relationships should start on an even footing but sometimes I feel unequal anyway due to me inexperiance. Maybe that's why sometimes I feel drawn to younger women, like the 21 year old geek girl.

With her age group I'd feel like she's a closer match with me for maturity.

21 isn't THAT much younger than you.

Now...If I went out with a 21-year-old LOL

She's legal, not jailbait.

It's not at all unusual for 21-year-old women to go out with guys who are, say, in their 30's or 40's.

Hey, I wasn't trying to apologise for liking her, I was just trying to say it like it is.

Anyway, I think we have more similarity in personality compared to that other girl.

So have you asked geek girl to meet up yet?

Never thought you were apologizing--that wouldn't make sense.

It just that it seemed like you regarded someone who is 21 as being "much younger" than you, which really isn't true.

If you feel that spark, then go for it. Age is just a number (unless she's under 18).

I once knew a woman who, at 13, was living with a man in his 30's (I didn't know her when she was 13).

Not yet. I'm trying to work out if it would be too fast or if I'm too slow. So far she's only written to me with bizzare animal facts (her idea). I'm not sure if she's uninterested in me or waiting for me take initiative.

She must've seen something in me since she contacted me first.

If I had a girl send me "bizarre animal facts," I would think that she's interested in me.

I would think that she's mighty cool as well.

Right up my alley!

"I'm enjoying our chat. Would you be interested in meeting up to chat about some other stuff as well? "

Just dooo eeeeet

You definitely didn't do anything wrong with the girl in the original post. I've met a lot of types that aim to confuse me they way this girl does in your story. I've learned it's best to keep those types at arm's length.