Such high standards

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And for whatever duration it lasts, it's not pleasant or desirable to be around someone who's very depressed.

Yes, it is treatable. It may respond to medication, or some sort of therapy, but it's also likely to respond to a healthier diet & plenty of exercise - so I disagree with your statement that you "need" to get psychiatric treatment for it.

Yes, being in that state creates constraints against positive changes.. but for me, being in that state was, in part, my motivation to make positive changes. I couldn't accept being in that state permanently. I had to figure out a way to think/feel better. I gave myself no other choice, really. I was determined to beat it & so, I did. And not instantly or by magic, but via learning, hard work, CBT to an extent, and naturopathic medicine. It also helped that I had (and have) wonderful friends in my life that I wanted to be around and wanted to be happy around vs. feel I was a burdening drain of energy on them. That also motivated me to do whatever I needed to do to improve my state of mind whenever my own personal well being and goals weren't quite enough to keep my focus.

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pretty sure goldfish is a guy. and it was about how he seems to keep ignoring that I am trying. offereing me the same failed advice won't work.

Last edited by sly279 on 17 Jan 2015, 2:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

If, 10 pages in, you haven't convinced others that your perspective is valid, then maybe it is time to let this thread die.

was in therapy for my adhd, but stopped for the seasonal job I have, I don't think I go back though now that work is over.

i need friends and stuff. i only get to like interact with a person online gaming once a week. thats pretty much all my social interaction. as i don't have any other online game friends since I moved to ps and they stayed on xbox. can't make more, as people don't socialize online anymore they all get in their private parties and play leaving the ingame chat silent. any possible benefit of medication is far outweighed by the possible worse side effects and loss of my rights.

If I had people to hang out with and do things with I'd probably be happy again. cue the you can't rely on people to bring you happiness people..

me if that was true then wouldn't' we all live alone instead of in big cities. humans like/need to intereact with other humans.

A few questions. Why not go back to therapy to work on your feelings of depression? It sounds like you've restricted your interpersonal relationships to the internet; what about friends in real life? Finally, could you elaborate on what you mean by "the possible worse side effects [of medication] and loss of [your] rights"?

You so can't. Other people will not bring you happiness, they will just frustrate you.
If the doctor has recommended medication, try it. Better living through chemistry.

Yes, I'm a guy.

OK then, what are you trying? What are you doing differently? How is it working out for you?

My advice is only "failed advice" if you've actually tried it and determined that it won't work for you. But somehow I find it difficult to believe that self improvement, healthy diet & exercise etc are things that won't work for anyone. Further, it hasn't been a long enough amount of time for you to have improved your health via diet & exercise, or other means, so that's another reason for me not to believe you've tried all of these things and they didn't work for you.

But I am curious, what are you doing & trying differently?

I get it, it's their fault and not yours. Always. Men never have high standards, they never wish for women to be blonde, thin, perfectly proportioned, do all the cooking and cleaning and caring for the kids, look 18 years old all her life and be a general sex slave.

You forgot "Never nags or argues".

Most don't require women to be blonde waifs who cook, clean, and take of the kids. In fact, a lot of us menz do NOT like skinny broads. But there is plenty of statistical evidence that women are indeed more selective than men. Call it sexism, but it's just a fact. The thing that guys like the OP need to do is find women who are attracted to them. Because the human population is large enough by now that >99% of people, regardless of sex or orientation, can find someone who wants to mate with them.

Might I add that it really isn't someones *fault* that they are or are not attracted to certain things. Attraction is an emotional response and you cannot decide to feel a certain way or not. You only can control whether or not you act upon it(most of the time).

Last edited by Lazar_Kaganovich on 17 Jan 2015, 3:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Healthy diet and exercise alone will NOT alleviate depression for many, many people my friend. Do not assume that what worked for you is going to work for the majority of depression sufferers. Some people have chronic depression that doesn't respond to anything except direct electrical stimulation of the brain. I do get depression once every 5-7 years but mine seems to respond best to prozac.

They may not be the only thing required for someone to feel whole & balanced again, but there's no denying that a healthy diet & plenty of exercise are good for everyone. The combination gets dopamine & serotonin pumping, which combats depression.

Counselling, therapy etc are all good tools to use, too. So are pharmaceuticals when necessary. But, IMO, too many people are too quick to medicate themselves vs. go get some fresh air, break a sweat, and cook up some healthy meals. YMMV.