Leaving Permanently

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Saying people who talk about leaving won't do it reminds me of the expression that people who talk about suicide won't kill themselves and that's not always true, either. Though you're right many more people talk about it than do either.

You're right too, I was thinking of Tallyman and there were some others I liked reading posts by who left around the same time, and I miss them.

Factual statements can be cruel. I remember a factual statement the pediatrician made expressing sympathy for my week old baby that tore me apart. It was factual, it was true she had a minor anomoly, but one so minor and temporary that I could not see any reason to worry and was terrified his seeing as a problem meant something really was wrong. He didn't mean to be cruel, but I wanted to just appreciate my perfect enough infant. Sometimes things are factual but we might be better off not overfocusing on that aspect of reality. My child was fine and needed no treatment just a bit of time, so it did turn out ok. I just worried a lot because of the comment.

Here's the thing ... if someone threatens suicide, we should take their threat seriuosly, no matter how much, or how little, dramatic expression they use.

But if someone threatens to leave, then there is an old saying that applies in every situation.

"Don't let the door hit you on the way out!"

This means to not dawdle or linger, but be quick about the departure.

Suicide is serious, but mere departure ... not so much. I say call the bluff of anyone who threatens to leave, but to do all that is necessary to prevent a suicide.

Who are you?

Sorry, but I've been here for years and I can only name about 10 people. If I don't love you or hate you, then I generally don't remember you.

Glad you are back.

You know, it's pretty sad when people's first response to my possibly changing my mind and returning after a while (and with the stipulation that I'm not going to post in regular topics, aside from maybe this one), is "he's fishing for attention". It's a ridiculous viewpoint, to be honest, and ironically, it's assumptions like that, that have led me to leave in the past for another break (which tend to be around 2 months these days, not a week). The fact is, I've been pushed more and more toward leaving almost every time I come back after those breaks, only this time, I already joined a totally different forum in order to actually have a place to go, and at this point I'm starting to question my decision to look at this site objectively and with a clear head (which led to my post about possibly staying). In fact, if you actually looked at my posts in a list, you'd see that I have hardly posted anything of worth in almost 6 months, there's a reason for that, largely it's been during this time that I've debated leaving for good, because of the BS that goes on here on WP, some of you have seen this process. Before posting my last post, I had all but completely left this site, doing everything from deleting my watched topics, to deleting my avatar, and my links to my blog (which no-one here reads, nor did I really expect anyone to). The site that I've been active on since the start of this topic has been so different from this site, it's like night and day, and while I know practically no-one there, and the topics aren't updated as often, I actually prefer that site over this one. That should say something to people here: I've been there all of a day, and I like it better than this site. That tells you all just how bad it really has been for me here. Spend a day on that site, you'll meet some nice people, but spend a day here, on WP, and you'll likely be insulted, degraded, have assumptions about you thrown around, and be called names (that's an average day at WP for me).

-On that note-
This forum is in such disarray, I don't even know where to begin to list the issues here. Most of them are issues that no other forum has to deal with (because of the fact that the admin is actually present on other forums, and knows how to delegate power to the mods). I mean, seriously, when I look at this forum, the only thing I can think is: "What the f**k is this sh*t?". This is the only forum that I've ever seen where the admin is absent and denies banning powers to the mods, which, seriously, that's why there are so many rude people left here, because they know they can do whatever the f**k they want to do, say whatever they want to say, to whomever they want, and nothing will be immediately done to them. Is it any wonder why respectable people leave this site? It's no mystery, and it's blatantly obvious, to me at least, that's the reason why there's a lack of respect here, as well as why people are leaving every month. The most that the mods can do when sh*t gets out of hand (last I checked) is lock a topic, but we all know (the mods especially), that doesn't solve the problem. I don't blame the mods for this issue, they're just trying to do their jobs with the few tools they have, but the site's overall management is a joke.

-Also-
There's so much duality to people on this site, a two headed coin has to do a quadruple take just to compete.
"Oh we'll miss your posts and we're sad to see you go, but if you happen to change your mind (like most people tend to), we'll call you an attention whore (pretty much) and question your motives for posting a goodbye topic, while at the same time, comparing you to other cases because [sarcasm] we just know you so well, that we can actually tell if you're a textbook case [end sarcasm]". God forbid anyone should ever post a topic about leaving and not immediately do so, or change their minds later on.
I posted this (and have a couple times in the past) in order to let people know my reason for leaving. I check it in case someone wanted to stay in contact with me (as unlikely as it is) and needs to know how to do so. And if I change my mind, it's only because I legitimately either decide to stay and give this place another chance (which, you all have convinced me, at this point, that this place is undeserving of even a second chance, let alone 3 or 4), or I think that my departure may have some negative effect on the forum (as stated right here in the thread, it's been mostly people who are less than respectful that's been left here, and posting more and more).
But, you guys are absolutely right, I shouldn't have been nice enough to let people know the reason for my sudden disappearance, I should have just quietly left, because at this moment, I see literally nothing but two-sided posters here, and there's no-one here I'd bother wasting my time telling about my departure, anymore.
And I shouldn't give a s**t about what happens to the forum after I'm gone either, in retrospect, in quietly leaving, I would've spared the mods a decent read on why I decided to leave too, I mean, seriously, why would the mods care whether or not people leave the forum, right? Surely they wouldn't want feedback so they could try to improve the forum for those few good people who are left... right?

I also find it slightly funny that the second comparison of this topic, being nothing more or less than what I've stated, was to that of a 'suicide threat'. The two situations have literally nothing in common, so the comparison, really, is flawed to say the least.

Oh, and the "don't let the door hit you on the way out" quote is more of a rude response, not meant as advice on how to make an exit, but rather at what speed. Being a matter of "glad you're leaving, just make it quick so we don't have to listen to you anymore".

The irony is, nobody here had to respond at any point, and if no-one had, I never would have bothered checking or replying to this thread, and my profile would've passed into obscurity and forgotten along with anyone else who left WP before me. The very fact that this has become a, now, 2 page thread where people are debating the legitimacy of my posts is a little ridiculous, but not at all surprising. In fact, it proves my point all too well.

@YippySkippy: If you don't know me, why bother posting in a topic where I've stated I'm leaving? That makes about as much sense as a screen door on a submarine. Do you always post in topics like this, asking who someone is when you don't know? Or is it just a trolling habit you have just developed and thought it would be fun to try on someone who's clearly annoyed with the site?

[quote="Jaden]The very fact that this has become a, now, 2 page thread where people are debating the legitimacy of my posts is a little ridiculous, but not at all surprising.[/quote]

Sorry you feel this way. You're a prominent veteran here at Wrong Planet, and many of us are happy to have you back.

Hey Jaden,

What you wrote is great fodder for a novel. I don't mean this in a facetious way.

Instead of getting all upset at people, just create characters out of the people whom you feel pissed off about--then insert them into your novel.

There's so much that is wasted on unproductive anger--which could be used for productive purposes instead.

That's a really good idea actually

Yes, I agree. You sound like an eloquent and engaging writer.

I was trying to comfort you with the assurance that WP will survive your departure.

Hi Jaden. I think those rude/mean posters don't represent the whole WP though they are unpleasantly noticeable. The majority of members are not nasty though they may not actively interact with you.

I believe you are seriously considering leaving. And if you decide to stay/come back, I won't think of you as an attention seeker and I'll be genuinely happy. As you said, that assumption is ridiculous. Please don't let the small number of nasty people affect you.

... no matter how often it happens ...

Farewell

To pick out the point of leaving and returning.. Some may find there are those who still do return..to check the site is in full use of its senses.. and doesn’t discriminate anyone making a post that may incur harm to themselves or others.

Many leave and do so without pointing a gun in the direction of the threat, or groups of radical WP followers.

Should anyone feel obligated to make their peace with the world and move on to new pastures, it wouldn’t surprise me why the influx has been so bad but, there are those who have gotten away with misconduct, so I don’t see why some members have been issued memos about site discretion, as it sounds more like ‘site destruction’ to me and further user alienation, hoax elimination.

Alex Plank is sort of an ass, a fink himself, have locked horns with him before.

Shaker's Law.

Google it.