Kuraudo7777 wrote:
I've had trouble loving myself. It's been like this for years, and reached its peak in the dark years, when part of me felt like I didn't deserve it, like I wasn't good enough for my inflated ego. I have no trouble loving everyone else, yet perhaps because of that, I either give too much love or barely any. That is what I have been doing for more than a year in particular, when she started loving me. Then, of course, my mum taught me to stick with things even when it's hard, but my way of doing things contradicts that, and always has: I try various things until I find things that I love or enjoy very much, and then stick when that. So...I'm really not sure what to do, as if I'm being pulled in two directions at once. I don't want to desert the one who loves me, but nor do I want to keep trying to love her romantically if we aren't the best fit. Nor do I ever want to cause her harm or hurt her, indirectly or not. My mind is making mountains out of molehills again.
You're not obliged to love someone romantically just because they love you that way.
If you're not feeling it, you're not feeling it.
And if you're not feeling it, you're kind of stringing her along, if you can't give back what she's looking for in a relationship.
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It's like I'm sleepwalking