WP Addicts Anonymous

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I was supposed to go visit my mom with the kids today and stay overnight and spend until 3.30 there tomorrow
I had a huge panic attack thing major shutdown (almost catatonic) etc

I had to work through it in my head and it was basically that I couldn’t get it together. The last time I visited my mom WITH kids was with my ex H so I think that really got to me

Also the lawyer situation etc kept rotating in my mind - it was awful

Then at one point my elder (he was jumping on the mattress ) came to me cuddled (of his own accord$ kissed me smiled and went back jumping
With this beautiful angelIc smile

He is an angel

It didn’t fix the panic and anxiety but it was so nice . my Parents kept calling worried and I couldn’t bring myself to pick up n tell my mom I couldn’t come.. told my dad who was constantly calling from Abu Dhabi all worried.. it was really frightening
Felt better after I decided n told them I can’t come..
Then me and my kids had a sort of dance session and they had a blast.

I can’t even handle this much the thought of going to visit my mom without Ex H but yeah. Healing, eh?

Sent to my brother n XH who both smoke

Some prefer their green stuff condensed.

I was very busy yesterday. I think I spent 5 hours with Barb and than I worked on 5 different paintings. I was also in a panic that I wouldn't reach yesterday's daily goal on Swagbucks so I was in a video watching frenzy. I didn't reach my earnings goal anyways. I was getting very tired around 9:30 craving the softness and security of my favourite blanket. Do I earn those bucks, or do I turn in for the night. I went to bed instead of spending three more hours watching videos.

What's the topic of this thread and who are you people?

I was about to ask the same thing. The last I remember I was standing on the transporter pad. There was a flash of light, and now I'm here, wherever "here" is.

My question has nothing to do with Star Wars.

Yeah I relate to Marknis here particularity with the whole gov spying on me and all in my stuff, but I can explain where my mindset was when I made a lot of the posts related to my struggle. Drugs is a big part of it too (Not just weed but even some legal messed me up) and living in a the hood and so on and so on. I can think of some better wording for my experiences for sure. As for violence witnessed in homeless, there were two friends that were bullying people in the streets, I know their names but no one ever asked so I doubt anyone cares. I am not a hacker and I said that more then enough but I do modify game consoles and stuff that can be considered a white hat hacker I suppose but most was running other people's programs. The problem with MKUltra is if you say something to insinuate a few feet in the wrong direction, the powers at be will make it into a mile

It's good that you have civil dialogue with your XH

the topic is to admit your addiction.

We are fellow addicts and pushers , we draw you in and then get you hooked on WP crack.

Ah so that's why the first post was free.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIzRGHuJt_I

yep, pusher psychology 101

Raleigh is the biggest pusher here

We had thunder today.

I am almost 30 and I still struggle.