I now know why I'm uncomfortable with my name

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starfox
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25 Oct 2015, 1:56 pm

DevilKisses wrote:
I have an update. I found my alter ego two dimensional, so I decided to create a tulpa. A tulpa is basically a sentient imaginary friend. I thought it would be a good way to make my alter ego more three dimensional. I was wrong.

They do warn you about "head pressures". For me they were more like whole body pressures. I also lost a lot of my energy and motivation and got way more sensory problems. I even ended up having a panic attack about egocide.

I guess I have to find another way to make my alter ego three dimensional. I wish I got more warnings about tulpas draining my energy.

You know your making things up right?

I do know that made up things can create real physical effects though; I've experienced that.


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Edenthiel
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25 Oct 2015, 2:53 pm

starfox wrote:
DevilKisses wrote:
I have an update. I found my alter ego two dimensional, so I decided to create a tulpa. A tulpa is basically a sentient imaginary friend. I thought it would be a good way to make my alter ego more three dimensional. I was wrong.

They do warn you about "head pressures". For me they were more like whole body pressures. I also lost a lot of my energy and motivation and got way more sensory problems. I even ended up having a panic attack about egocide.

I guess I have to find another way to make my alter ego three dimensional. I wish I got more warnings about tulpas draining my energy.

You know your making things up right?

I do know that made up things can create real physical effects though; I've experienced that.


I think that, perhaps, it all reconciles if you consider them as 'useful constructs' rather than 'made up' (which implies pure imagination)?


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boygeniusemil
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25 Oct 2015, 3:55 pm

I didn't know there were others that had different names for their alter egos as well. That's a comforting thought... I had been afraid for some time that I had a sort of personality disorder because I sometimes feel like I'm sharing a body with many different people, but I probably feel that way because I give different aspects of myself different names.

I have an alter ego named "Marigold" who is female and likes to get primped and put on brightly colored makeup and clothing and do traditionally feminine things that I (emil) have little to no interest in doing. But she is still me, because I'm completely conscious while I'm being her. It's pretty strange, but I guess I'm not the only one.


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starfox
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25 Oct 2015, 5:09 pm

Edenthiel: yeah, it just depends upon perception.

Boygenius: me too actually and it's useful. Like playing a game, it makes things easier to handle


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Earthling
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25 Oct 2015, 5:14 pm

I wonder if different personas are this young people thing, that I never did, called "finding yourself".



naturalplastic
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25 Oct 2015, 7:39 pm

Sounds like if you just took meds for depression then you would be "Sage Green".