Is anyone lowering their standards or willing to settle?

Post Reply New Topic

I dont know but most people do it.mperhaps they get their new SO into the stuff they like. I met tons of women shooting or at air soft who weren't into it until their bf/husband got them into it.

For music there's head phones. I not going reject a lady only because we don't like similar music.

Not a lot of fun loving, cartoon watching, scifi enjoying, pop music liking, video Game playing, outdoor loving, sweet kind women out there.

Better off bein with whoever will love me and trying to introduce them to those things as I suspect they'll try to introduce me to their things. Don't you enjoy learning new things?

Being with someone who shares everything in common might be boring. Anyway you're s girl you have way more choices, so of course you can wait for the perfect match. Guys don't have that option, we are the chosen not the choosers. If some girl makes the mistake of choosing us then we can't afford to reject her over such petty stuff as music or interests. I can play games alone if she allow me to play games at all. I can listen to music in the bathroom or bus as I currently do. I've never met a girl into Scifi, but I like most shows and movies so I can watch stuff with her cuddled up and watch my other shows later while she's doing some activity I don't like.

You've been with more guys then Me women as I've had none. I'm almost through my life and I've been forever single. Most people have 5 relationships by time their 20. I so afraid people will find out I've never had a GF and laugh at me. Im a freak i dont know why I even bother getting up every day it's so pointless. All so I can be dead in a few years, nothing I do matters, it's pointless repetition. Day in and day out. If I didn't wake up tomorrow no one would care or notice.

So if no one will ever settle I'll always be trapped in this non-exsistience.

It's reality. As people have pointed out I'm no catch. Can't change that. This is likely the only job I'll ever have. I tried my best but effort doesn't mean s**t in the real world. Money and connections does. Hard things to have being a poor born aspie. I'm trapped.

Surprise you'd enjoy concerts they sound like a Aspies worst nightmare. Sensory overload.


I can't offer anything that other men can't fake. Only things good about me see just considered being s good human, even if most people don't do it. I don't have the body or money most women require of men. Women most likely to not care I'm getting farther away from as 18-22 year olds don't tend to want to date someone over 26.

Not sure how much longer o can take this nothingness. And having to see everyone else be happy and have love around me. It's sticking having to see coworkers bphave relationships and families while I'm not even seen as good enough to talk to none less go on a date.

Why do I keep getting up. I try sleeping as much as I can when. It working. Working, riding the bus to work it's all hell. Women are everywhere.
None of them willing to settle and give me a chance.

I've always had what I consider extremely high standards as they didn't revolve around looks and personality, but around things a lot harder to achieve. I knew very well what I wanted in a partner and had good reasons for it. I got the time to understand myself and thought things through and ended up not caring about a lot of things many seem to concentrate on but highly value others that don't usually seem to play much part for them. So not settling was the key to my happy marriage.

I think two of the biggest mistakes people make are
1. Not understanding what they want and need and concentrating on shallow, irrelevant traits
2. "Settling down" just so they would be with someone, anyone - this one basically guarantees misery and unhappiness for both parties.

I have been thinking on this a lot recently. Especially since the last women I dated recently was begging me to get back with over the weekend.... Basically I really lowered my standards when I went out with her. But now I realise that I can't lower my standards I just won't accept the person. Even my ex wife I am realising I lowered my standards.... I just needed someone and she was there and we got on, not that I regret it though. But my standards are very high my sister kept telling me for years when I rejected women after women she couldn't understand what I didn't like about them. I reject someone based on their behaviour I do it without thinking one second I am interested then for all I could care they could be dead I know that is quite extreme but I just don't see the point. I am working on this and trying to have women friends actually meeting a gamer women tonight for a drink.

So I think lowering your standards to be with someone is basically a bad idea (in my opinion) as you aren't likely to be happy in the end. I have only ever met 2 women who I liked 100% 1 was with a friend (we knew each other from school though) was awkward as she talked to me more than him when we were out anywhere as we just clicked and we both knew it but I refused to do anything about it. And the other we also just got on really well but she was with someone (married to him I believe now) looking back that may have been a pure lust thing though was young and I think its only time ever I knew I flirted with someone :S

_________________
( If I ignore a reply it's not intentional I get distracted, send me a PM to prompt me )

My standards are generally quite lenient, in part due to a lack of experience. But I'd want somebody who is open to understanding me and how I see things, and likewise they are also open to helping me understanding them. And I'd want someone whom is a good friend, first and foremost. This includes trust, honesty, compatibility etc. and for me this should be the focus of any relationship and the most important. The lovers part is just the differentiator between friends and partners. If they are discriminatory in any way then they're out, likewise if aren't prepared to learn about autism and any coexisting conditions they are also out. Also, the obvious abuser/manipulator red flags, I'm good at spotting this due to my own father being an emotional abuser against my mum for many years.

Still nope!

I've still had some hookups here and there for fun, but in terms of dating or getting into a relationship.. nope - never settling. Although, one of the cute boys I was having some fun with on the weekend I'd like to meet again.. heh.

I've gone on a few dates, which were nice, but essentially ruled those people out as potential partners. I'm currently waiting to meet someone for a first date and see how that goes.. so far so good w/ texting. We have a few things in common, and enough differences to make things interesting. We've also both done volunteer work for the same youth homeless shelter in different capacities, so that's cool. Time will tell when we meet sometime in the next week or two whether we click in real life or not.

Settling isn't an option. Gotta feel right or else I'm just down for fun when I feel like it.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.