Do you feel like a burden?

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Due to my mental health problems I'm living at home with my parents, although I think my parents are ok with this. I feel that at my age I should be independent and shouldn't be reliant on my parents.

Are there any people in a similar situation? How do you feel?

Not a burden, exactly, as I'm high-functioning enough to meet my own daily personal needs and was even able to take care of children (I had four, and was the stay-at-home mom for seventeen years).

But I do, sometimes, feel like a major annoyance or irritant, or like getting involved with me was the biggest mistake my life partner ever made.

There's a line from a Skillet song: "I know I'm a mess, and I wish I were someone--someone that you'd like better" that really fits when I feel this way.

The Song is called Would It Matter.

I feel like a burden, but I don't feel guilty about it, because I feel like society in general is not giving me an opportunity to be a productive member.

Feeling like a burden is one thing; knowing you are one is another.

The world doesn't owe anyone a chance. As someone said, it was here first.

The world yes, society no. Most autistics have no problems with the world they have problems with other people, i.e. society. And no, society was not here before humans were, it's an entirely human made construct which also means it can change to be more accepting should it choose to.

Alas, the people I'm a burden on can't singlehandedly change society, so I can't really blame them.

But while there are some problems caused by the crappy way society works, most of my current problems are personal.

The older I get, the more I feel like a total burden on my family.

I used to, if only because I live in a world where autistic people are considered a blight on society. I've reached a point where I no longer care what others think of me, and if they find me annoying or high-maintenance, they have no place in my life.

Honestly, yes. I scrape by on disability, I barely take care of myself or my place, and I have no real ambitions for employment or education as of right now. I know I could be doing more with myself and my life, but I just can't seem to get off my ass to do anything.

Someone talked me into posting here again somewhat. Might as well give it another shot and see how it goes. We will see.

I voted no because I'm the wife and mother here and lady of the house. I basically do everything for everybody so if anything I'd be the one keeping things running smoothly.

To the OP, I have four kids, 19 - 26 and right now they all live here except my oldest son. He moved back in for a while in 2014 and moved out about six months later. He had broken up with his gf and baby mama so he came back home. He lost his job and basically laid around the house depressed for months. I never thought of him as a burden. He's my son and he needed me and so he was welcome here and I was happy to do anything I could for him. Sometimes ID get fed up because all he did was lay around and drink and talk about missing that baby mama of his, but he wasn't a burden, I was just irritated at times with him. He met a new girl and got a new job and fell in love and they now live in a house on her parents land that he's doing some work on and they have his little girl about three weeks out of the month.

Kids are never a burden to their parents, even though the parents may get irritated or annoyed or fed up at times. That doesn't make you a burden at all.

Do you do things and help out around the house and show appreciation for the stuff your mom died? That's the important thing in my opinion. Also, if you feel that way then sit your folks down and talk to them about it. Tell them you feel like a burden and would like to be able to not feel that way and ask them what you can do.

Sometimes, like now that I'm stuck at home for a few months and have to rely on my parents for free housing. I'd prefer to have my own apartment that I was actually paying for back at college. I hate being dependent I'll feel less so in a few weeks when I start my potential payed internship with my moms company for the planting season

Welcome back, I missed you.

Like LyraLuthTinu above i often feel that I am my wifes big mistake.

Same for me, even though I am not, but feel like it.

I know they would sincerely deny it, but it is really hard not to feel that way.

I told my daughter it would not be feasible to live with us so we have spent a lot of effort getting her subsidized housing. So far, so good. She needs her space; so do we.

She had a messy financial/legal situation and it would never have gotten that bad if she had taken my earlier advice. I need what limited brain capacity I have to figure out my own affairs of living. I told her I simply could not help her further with that matter. We did connect her up with a social worker who has made still other connections for her.

I guess what I'm saying is, it's up to your family to be "adult" about it and set limits as to how much burden they can comfortably stand. My daughter does create a minor burden but overall I am very happy to have her as my daughter.

Ezra, at your age, you are still expected to be housed and fed by your parents, and would be even if you had zero disability. So stop worrying about the burden until later on. (kidding)

Everyone should stop to consider that there can be contributions that offset a burden. If you aren't making them, perhaps you should start so that you will feel less of a burden. A few chores, or babysitting other children in the household, or assistance with a project such as a home repair, or taking care of the pets, or filing all the paid bills, these are things that might make it plain enjoyable for someone to have you around. Also showing concern for their aches, pains, and worries can make you valuable. And although it may not have occurred to you, simply being home to let the appliance repair guy in can be quite valuable to a parent who works a full-time job.