stabbing

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Every time I get an overwhelming emotion such as anger or anxiety, I get the strong urge to stab myself in the leg. When the feeling is more chronic but less intense, I feel more like cutting, but when it's sudden and hits hard, I want to stab myself.

Probably will end up going back to the psych hospital for this and another thing that's going on with me again. I just don't wanna go before my old schools' band concerts. I don't want to miss them again. I missed the Spring ones from being in the hospital. I really don't want to miss the Christmas ones too.

I used to stab myself when I was in my teens; that was my first realization of self-harm before I started cutting. It was a long road before I was able to stop...I just had to find the right coping mechanisms to stave off the desire. Do you have any other coping mechanisms which would distract you from stabbing?

If you feel you need to go to the hospital, then my advice is to do it. I've been hospitalized many times and have missed many events because of such (including a Christmas Eve/Day), but it's a far, far better alternative than letting things get out of hand and doing something physically or emotionally damaging. Personal health should always come first, and others typically have a tendency to understand that.

Sending good vibes your way. Hope things work out for the best.

I don't know if you wanted advice, but here it is:

Keep knives and other sharp objects out of your reach. Ask other people to help you keep sharp object away if necessary.

Try to figure out what about the stabbing feels satisfying, and think of another action that could provide that satisfaction.

Or you can go to your doc and tell him about your anxiety ask for a lorazepam do all the fun thing.
And go to the hospital.

*jusf one warning
If i take my benzos i cut a lot more even for nothing idk how it works whit you

I had a very similar problem for a while. I never understood why I would suddenly get the urge to stab or hurt myself. I think it was usually when I felt extremely frustrated and was looking for some kind of "release." I found that standing barefoot in snow or holding ice cubes to the point of pain was an alternative that would produce the same shock to the system without causing as much damage. I would recommend having someone you trust very much to monitor you to make sure that you don't cause any damage while seeing if the ice helps. I wish you the best of luck, my intrusive thoughts of self harm landed me in a crisis unit, I understand how much someone would want to avoid those damn places.