A personal autism reference card
One of the books I'm reading suggests typing out a one page description of autism, as it affects you personally, to help family members and employers, if you choose to disclose, better understand you. They also recommended something like a business card with a few key points you can give people. I forget which book I read it in. I have four going at the moment: Nerdy Shy And Socially Inappropriate; Been There Done That Now Try This!: An Aspie's Guide to Life on Earth; The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome; and NeuroTribes. It's one of those I think ... or maybe one I read before this set. Anyway...
My diagnosis is recent. So far, not including my nuclear family, I have only shared it with two people. It was met with some doubt even though they don't really know anything about it. I tried to explain a little about it and got comments like "everyone struggles with social communication" and "everyone is forgetful", "everyone fidgets", "certain sounds hurt my ears too" etc. So I'm a little wary of sharing it at all now and I'm not sure I would ever actually hand such a card to someone. Though I'm unsure of the practically it of of, the idea is sort of neat. I can think of a few things I'd like for people to know when dealing with me. Things I have been trying to tell people for years even before my Dx.
It made me wonder that other people's cards would look like. I don't know I would want to say the same things to people who know me well vs acquaintances but mine might look something like:
* Be direct with me. I don't read between the lines well and I don't do subtle
* Please don't make a lot of noise around me
* If you need me to remember something convey it in digital form or make sure I capture it digitally. I'll forget if you just tell me and if you put it on paper I'll lose the paper.
* If you want me to know what you are feeling tell me and if you want to know how I'm feeling ask me. Trust what I tell you over whatever you're reading off my body or face
* I may sometimes seem irrationally upset. It might be disproportionate anger, I may cry for no reason you can discern, or I may just shut down. Please be patient with me. Give me space and a time and I'll be fine.
How about you guys?
StampySquiddyFan
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Joined: 19 Jul 2017
Age: 20
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,754
Location: Stampy's Lovely World
I've heard of this before as well. Mine might look something like this:
-Please don't take it personally if I don't get your jokes or I seem inattentive in conversation. It is hard for me to pick up on things and socialize well
-Please do not make a lot of loud noise around me. It can really hurt my ears.
-If you are going to give me a hug or touch me, warn me first. I can really freak out sometimes if you don't.
-Please be mindful of the fact that I like to carry around toys and other objects with me sometimes. It helps me feel more secure.
-If you can, please take into consideration the fact that I have trouble focusing on things that don't interest me. That make it hard for me to read what you want to read for Book Clubs or talk about certain subjects.
-I move around a lot! Please don't attempt to stop me if I am doing something that doesn't seem "normal" to you, like echolalia (repeating dialogue) or listening to the same song 500 times in a row.
-I can get very upset if you try to change something I have planned. Don't take it personally; I just need to be able to plan ahead in order to be okay.
-If I seem upset or tired, please don't push me to do something. I may be having a really hard time.
-If I seem cold or aloof to your feelings, please do not take it personally. I have empathy, but I find it hard to express.
-You may need to initiate the first move if you want to be my friend. I love having friends, but going up to someone is probably the last thing I would ever do .
This is why I don't have one of those cards. That is way too much for some poor person to remember !
_________________
Hi! I'm Stampy (not the actual YouTuber, just a fan!) and I have been diagnosed professionally with ASD and OCD and likely have TS. If you have any questions or just want to talk, please feel free to PM me!
Current Interests: Stampy Cat, AGT, and Medicine
dragonsanddemons
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I've thought it would be a good idea for me to have a card to give people - it would be good in case of emergencies, and I also am terrible at explaining things spur-of-the-moment. Here's what I've come up with...
I have an autism spectrum disorder.
*This affects my ability to communicate, especially in stressful situations.
*I may have difficulty understanding instructions and answering questions properly.
*I may try to communicate using a text-to-speech app I have on my phone or writing instead of speaking.
*I am easily overwhelmed by noise and crowds.
*Please warn me before touching me.
*I may make repetitive movements or noises. This is also because of my autism, and helps calm me.
*If I seem very upset, I probably need some time alone to calm down.
*If there is a dog with me, he is my service dog. He will also help calm me.
*Eye contact makes me uncomfortable. If I am not making eye contact, that's why.
*I am trying to be cooperative, even if it may not seem like it.
_________________
Yet in my new wildness and freedom I almost welcome the bitterness of alienage. For although nepenthe has calmed me, I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men.
-H. P. Lovecraft, "The Outsider"
To the OP. You don't need to pay any attention to what those people were saying to you. They are disrespectful of you.
I'm proud of your progress. I love your card. I gave a verbal version of it. One more thing to add.
Don't make me have to constantly guess where I stand with you. If this becomes a pattern, I will wander off.
I'm proud of your progress. I love your card. I gave a verbal version of it. One more thing to add.
Don't make me have to constantly guess where I stand with you. If this becomes a pattern, I will wander off.
Thanks!
Campin_Cat
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Age: 62
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Posts: 25,953
Location: Baltimore, Maryland, U.S.A.
Here's the URL to an ID card, that someone else posted, somewhere on here:
http://www.gocit.org/care-cards.html
.....and, here's a cartoon Asperger's guide, that a former member made (it's the third sticky, right here on the GAD index page):
http://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=112787
I copied it, pics and all, put the author's name on it, and give it out, every once-in-awhile.
Obviously, you don't HAVE TO use either of these things----but, maybe they'll give you some ideas.
_________________
White female; age 59; diagnosed Aspie.
I use caps for emphasis----I'm NOT angry or shouting. I use caps like others use italics, underline, or bold.
"What we know is a drop; what we don't know, is an ocean." (Sir Isaac Newton)
.....and, here's a cartoon Asperger's guide, that a former member made (it's the third sticky, right here on the GAD index page):
http://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=112787...
I have wanted to see these since I first saw that thread but all of the images look like "Please update your account to enable third party hosting". I'm not sure if the problem is on my end or with the originals
sunshinescj
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Joined: 16 Mar 2014
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 183
Location: Ohio, USA
My diagnosis is recent. So far, not including my nuclear family, I have only shared it with two people. It was met with some doubt even though they don't really know anything about it. I tried to explain a little about it and got comments like "everyone struggles with social communication" and "everyone is forgetful", "everyone fidgets", "certain sounds hurt my ears too" etc. So I'm a little wary of sharing it at all now and I'm not sure I would ever actually hand such a card to someone. Though I'm unsure of the practically it of of, the idea is sort of neat. I can think of a few things I'd like for people to know when dealing with me. Things I have been trying to tell people for years even before my Dx.
It made me wonder that other people's cards would look like. I don't know I would want to say the same things to people who know me well vs acquaintances but mine might look something like:
* Be direct with me. I don't read between the lines well and I don't do subtle
* Please don't make a lot of noise around me
* If you need me to remember something convey it in digital form or make sure I capture it digitally. I'll forget if you just tell me and if you put it on paper I'll lose the paper.
* If you want me to know what you are feeling tell me and if you want to know how I'm feeling ask me. Trust what I tell you over whatever you're reading off my body or face
* I may sometimes seem irrationally upset. It might be disproportionate anger, I may cry for no reason you can discern, or I may just shut down. Please be patient with me. Give me space and a time and I'll be fine.
How about you guys?
I think it may or may not be useful depending on the situation by the way it's from the complete guide to Aspergers syndrome I just started reading the book myself yesterday!
Campin_Cat
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Joined: 6 May 2014
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 25,953
Location: Baltimore, Maryland, U.S.A.
.....and, here's a cartoon Asperger's guide, that a former member made (it's the third sticky, right here on the GAD index page):
http://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=112787...
I have wanted to see these since I first saw that thread but all of the images look like "Please update your account to enable third party hosting". I'm not sure if the problem is on my end or with the originals
Oh, SHOOT----it's one of those bloomin' PhotoBucket accounts, and PB just started that "Update Your Account", crap. Unfortunately, I don't have a image-hosting account, or I'd upload them, for everybody.....
_________________
White female; age 59; diagnosed Aspie.
I use caps for emphasis----I'm NOT angry or shouting. I use caps like others use italics, underline, or bold.
"What we know is a drop; what we don't know, is an ocean." (Sir Isaac Newton)
I've been mentally working on a similar thing, something like an "elevator pitch" to explain to people what it means when I say I have an ASD. The only thing I'd put on mine that I haven't seen here yet (forgive me if I've missed it) is
* I struggle with quickly shifting my attention, especially if I'm deeply focused on something, which I usually am.
Campin_Cat
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Joined: 6 May 2014
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 25,953
Location: Baltimore, Maryland, U.S.A.
I thought I had seen it, somewhere else, and I FOUND IT!!
Go here, and scroll-down, to where it says: "Sunday, November 29, 2009", on the lefthand side.
_________________
White female; age 59; diagnosed Aspie.
I use caps for emphasis----I'm NOT angry or shouting. I use caps like others use italics, underline, or bold.
"What we know is a drop; what we don't know, is an ocean." (Sir Isaac Newton)
This is probably the only place I can totally let my guard down and be myself. Where I can interact with other people without the exhausting effort of trying to fit in and be "normal".
I'll be around for the foreseeable future. I will post and sometimes it will be about how I'm doing (keeping you posted about how I'm doing).
You are kind. Thank you.
* I struggle with quickly shifting my attention, especially if I'm deeply focused on something, which I usually am.
Me too. Want to put something like this together and learn off by heart. maybe something in writing would help too
* Be direct with me. I don't read between the lines well and I don't do subtle
* Please don't make a lot of noise around me
* If you need me to remember something convey it in digital form or make sure I capture it digitally. I'll forget if you just tell me and if you put it on paper I'll lose the paper.
* If you want me to know what you are feeling tell me and if you want to know how I'm feeling ask me. Trust what I tell you over whatever you're reading off my body or face
* I may sometimes seem irrationally upset. It might be disproportionate anger, I may cry for no reason you can discern, or I may just shut down. Please be patient with me. Give me space and a time and I'll be fine.
How about you guys?
Wow what an awesome idea. Hey I know this is an old post but I just found it as I'm new here and I really like this idea! I agree with most of these card ideas but I won't criticize the ones I don't have in common because criticism is one of my things that I can't tolerate. At all. And I would like to add to them if I could:
* Could you please be nice to me and not mean because I get upset very easily and I may cry in front of you
* Please don't criticize me, I do things the way I'm most familiar with because I find a great deal of comfort in routine, not because they might be the most efficient ways
* If children around me start crying around me I will be extremely upset, cover my ears, make noise and I will run away, but don't worry I'll be fine later
* Please don't tell me what to do, I don't know what your intentions really are because I can't interpret social cues
* Please don't insult my taste in music, it's a very personal thing with me and I will block you forever if you do in an attempt to protect my emotional state
* Please don't treat me like a child, I'm an adult and although I may feel and act like a child your childish treatment is very upsetting
That should do for now, the important ones anyways. I could fill a book with ALL of them.
_________________
*** High Functioning Autism - Asperger's Syndrome ***
ADHD, OCD, and PTSD.
Keep calm and stim away.
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