I've gotten a whole lot better over the past year as a writer. I didn't write regularly until 29, and when I did I got better at talking too. Feel satisfied with life, I'm in a good situation. However, I constantly obsess over getting emotionally close to people. I don't have problems socializing if I'm put into the situation, but I do my very best to avoid any conversation. I don't have any hobbies outside the house, I don't enjoy being around people. I've talked to people online and joined guilds in MMORPGs where I made somewhat friends, but I never felt close to them.
After I figured out human connection comes from seeing other people have the same emotions as you, I was able to comfort myself a bit better. I'm writing books to share how I feel about the world with others. Don't know if it'll be enough, but I was curious how other people with autism dealt with getting closer in friendships.
I've had friends before as well, had a roommate I got along with(mostly), definitely spending time with people and learning how to socialize and share feelings got me to another level of closeness. However, whenever I think about doing something new or meeting new people, I feel like I froze up like an ice block.
This extends to internet relationships like chat rooms and forums too. I love how I can post and people can respond whenever, whatever, it's a much easier way of dealing with this. The problem is that I don't feel close to anyone, important to anyone.
What are your experiences with making a relationship and getting closer with people?
04 Oct 2017, 4:13 pm
