funeralxempire wrote:
TheSpectrum wrote:
Someone here would still take her.
For a day or two, until they needed space.
That's the thing about pathetically desperate, clingy people, they're a turn off even to other pathetically desperate or clingy people.
Indeed.
Indeed, I think sometimes it can hold a mirror up to you if you are THAT guy. Pathetic, desperate, and clingy all describe me at one point in life. And I ended up attracting someone else exactly like that.
I dumped her for another girl who cheated on me and dumped me for another guy and ghosted me. I went full-on stalker on her and am lucky I didn’t end up in jail.
What happened with me was I was forced to step things up with my internship and no longer had time for this girl. When I stopped calling, she got worried and started calling ME, just to make sure I was “still ok.”
Having to refocus away from the silliness and immaturity really showed me how low I’d fallen, and really forced me to come to terms with having been this way my whole life. It was a turning point for me, and my perspective on women, love, and relationships was totally undone. It was exactly what I needed at the time.
Since then there was only one girl that I broke up with. She was amazing. We were good together. It’s sad when there’s no future with someone you love that much. But it’s so much better when you can get to that place with a clear head and not feel you have to fight all or nothing for this ONE PERSON.
Insanity takes many forms, including treating someone as though nobody will have them if you cannot. If someone makes you that miserable, if he rejects you or hurts you, or even threatens you, why keep going back or threatening to do even worse if he tries to leave? It’s like little kids and their toys. Like, when you aren’t playing with a toy and someone else plays with it. He can’t have it because it’s YOURS. You didn’t want it until it was gone or in someone else’s hands. So there’s this mentality that even if someone is bad for you, he or she is still YOUR possession, and it’s perfectly ok to do what it takes to keep it that way.
Psychotic people don’t just let people or things go like that. There are no limits. There are no boundaries, no rationale, no REASON. If you are reasonably sane enough to recognize that in someone, you know you won’t easily escape his or her clutches.
So you have to make a choice. Do I love this person enough to stay with her through the meltdowns, temper tantrums, broken dishes, suicide attempts, drug overdoses, etc.? Can I truly handle this person and know myself enough to always do what is right by this person and protect her from herself? Or is the only reason I’m with her that I don’t think anyone else would ever have me? Would I ever reach that point when I’d rather be forever alone than with HER?
You have to learn to spot these people early on. Because if you go 2 dates with this girl and let her spend the night on the 3rd, she’s not going anywhere.