Two truths and a lie

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I didn't know how to kiss properly then.

We kissed....but it was more like pecks than "real" kisses.

She tried to tongue-kiss me---but I wasn't coordinated. It didn't work.

It WAS romantic, though. We were on the floor of the "rec hall" at summer camp.

I remember when I first discovered I REALLY liked girls.

I was walking to the Museum of Natural History so I could go into their library and study some pictures of skulls of Neanderthal men. It was probably October of 1975; I was still 14. My voice just changed.

I was walking on a passageway (also used by cars) in Central Park. It was a foggy day. All of a sudden, I just got this feeling-----the feeling that I wanted to devote my life to a girl!

For some time afterwards, I was absolutely obsessed with wanting to get a girlfriend and share my life with her.

I've never Biblically known anyone outside of marriage.

I wish I had married someone other than my ex-wife.

I'm from another solar system.

#3

Are you trying to entice me with references to MNH and Central Park? (lol)
I think it's cute you have so many memories about "coming of age".
Did you find that girl? What happened?

Yes, #3 for the solar system -- for parakeet.

Nope. I didn't find a true girlfriend until I was 18, and a senior in high school.

I went out on dates. And I had a few "experiences." But no true girlfriend.

I did make it to the library at the Museum of Natural History that day. I did get that book I wanted, which described some Neanderthal Man skulls. But I was too overwhelmed by the atmosphere to really benefit from what I was reading.

I regret never again visiting that library.

Isn't it incredible how much detail we can summon when recreating some of our memories? Others draw a blank. I've been craving a trip to a library lately. A huge library overlooking water (looking at water is good... ha), with squishy chairs and a fireplace and natural lighting. I can't find one and doubt I'd be comfortable even if I did. Either that or I'd be in such awe for sensory reasons that I wouldn't be able to read.

Are you very shy? I wonder why I nice man like you is single. No jokes.

I'm actually married.

I used to be quite shy when I was a teenager.

I only "got out of myself" recently.

Your life has been quite exciting and interesting. Mine, in comparison, has been pretty mundane.

My apologies. I didn't know you were married. Is your wife (assuming not husband) neurotypical? I don't think anyone's life is mundane, even if you used to be quite shy. Do you have children?

My life has been overwhelming, for lack of a better word. I wouldn't call it "exciting" although I appreciate your attempt at a giving it a positive spin. I wonder how my life / your life / the life of anyone on the spectrum / would be different if we knew all along? Or, if we were born NT? I wouldn't want to be NT because I like my unique traits and they're embedded in my character, but I doubt I would have been so vulnerable to manipulation or marginalization if I wasn't socially naive.

1. All my dolls had the same name
2. I was obsessed with Grover
3. I won the city spelling bee

You just have this exuberance, Isabella. Your ideas flow. When you spoke about your enthusiasm for Elton John, you glowed. I sense that we are about the same age---but you are so youthful!

You probably have a unique perspective on things, after overcoming so much.

I'm sure, if we met, that we would be great friends.

You were born the way you were. Just like I was born the way I am. I have a few regrets--but not many. I'm just a clerk. But I will retire soon, with a decent pension. I've worked at the same place 37 years with no promotions.

Did you want me to determine which one of the things you listed was a lie? I would say #1.

I liked Grover okay. But I liked the Cookie Monster better. I was 8 years old when Sesame Street started. I sense, now, that you're about five years younger than me.

My wife is an NT---and doesn't understand much about me. She's a very practical person; whereas I'm sort of a creative-type person.

We have more a brother-sister relationship now than a husband-wife. We respect each other. We are great friends.

This is absolutely the sweetest message ever. Thanks so much
I think I'll print and frame it if you don't mind. I might even show my psychologist tomorrow. I'll be able to tell him: "Yes, there are nice people out there, apparently".

All my dolls did have the same name (I couldn't tell them apart, so why not -- plus it was the only girl's name I liked).
I worshipped Grover because he was naive but eloquent with excellent grammar (no contractions).
Cookie was, however, a great man. I'm glad you liked him.

I didn't win any spelling bees that I remember.
I only remember giving an art dedication at a library, and a book talk at the shopping mall. I didn't do competitive things.
Oh, and my teacher made me a yellow bookmark and let me be the first kid to use pen full-time (instead of pencil).

It was all downhill from there.

Thanks again. Yes you are in the ballpark of logical thinking.

That's sweet, Isabella. And I really like the name "Isabella." It's so classy and feminine. And classic, too.

My impression is that you will be able to give sage advice here, based upon your life so far. And it's sage because it's not cynical. Yet it's based on knowledge which might make many people cynical, even some people with strength.

You mention wearing a headscarf. This gives me a vision of you as being the Belle of the Drawing Room. The "good eccentric." The Bohemian who people flock to when they want to get away from the usual crap and gossip found in drawing rooms.

You have the unique inner strength to believe there is still romance. And you have been able to keep the good memories, as well as the bad. You don't have that sieve which separates the good from the bad, and keeps only the bad.

I need another frame. Thank you so much. You've become a trusted confidante.

Isabella is not my real name (unfortunately), but yes it is a pretty name. I like the colours and my life mirrors hers:

Isabella




Romance? Me? Never.

I meant "romance" more in the "chaste" sense, really.

It's because of your exuberance when you were describing living on the boat. And in your fandom.

You've gained enough wisdom to know when you are being duped----unlike the young Isabella Linton. This is wisdom which was hard-won---and which is solid.

You won't let yourself be duped any more!

You should write something about Isabella at around the age of 50.

People sometimes try to knock the idealism out of me. Sometimes very hard.

But I remain steadfast.

I feel like you've gotten many worse knocks than me.

But you've remained steadfast.

Just tell me when I'm overdoing it! I tend to do that in my exuberance.

But I do have an impression of you which is reflective of what I wrote.