I hate seeing young couples (rant)

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bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 5:01 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:

If I experienced any backlash, I know how to contact the police. Being on the spectrum is NOT an excuse for creepy, abusive behavior, and I will NOT tolerate it from anyone. I'm done with accepting excuses for abuse and tolerating it. Investigators can determine if any extenuating circumstances should be taken into consideration. That's not my job or responsibility. Ensuring my personal safety, on the other hand, IS my responsibility.

If someone is actually abusing or stalking you, then you are right to take any steps you can to protect yourself.

But you are dogmatically refusing to acknowledge that people with intellectual disabilities can be wrongly accused (meaning that they are completely innocent, and therefore don't meet your standards for someone you don't give a s**t about), and it can have very severe repercussions for them. This is not a hypothetical, it's something that has actually happened.

If you're fine with an innocent person's disability being used to arrest them, paint them as criminals, go through the stress of being processed by the police, ruin their lives and possibly even cause them to do time in prison, then you are the problem.

As an aside, given that our previous posts were deleted, let me be clear: I am very angry with you and with Isabella. I do not forgive you for the awful things that you said.



blitzkrieg
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28 Sep 2023, 5:12 pm

There are definitely people with learning difficulties who don't understand boundaries and who are not necessarily creeps or stalkers, but may come off as such because of a lack of social awareness, or experience in certain situations, for example, when dating.

This could be a person who lives in a care home for example but who still functions and is in paid work.



TwilightPrincess
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28 Sep 2023, 5:18 pm

bee33 wrote:
If you're fine with an innocent person's disability being used to arrest them, paint them as criminals, go through the stress of being processed by the police, ruin their lives and possibly even cause them to do time in prison, then you are the problem.

You can disagree with me all that you want to, but I'm not changing my stance. Police and investigators are more capable of evaluating for extenuating circumstances than I am. My number one priority in such a scenario is my own safety. Even people with disabilities can pose a threat.

People can disagree, express opinions, and debate without anger or personal attacks. Victims of harassment or abuse should not have their opinions or perspectives regarding lived experience stifled by someone else. I have positive views of law enforcement in general and will seek their help whenever I deem it appropriate. You are free to have a different perspective.

Our posts were removed because they were off-topic. This isn't PPR. Let's try to get back on topic.


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The Grand Inquisitor
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28 Sep 2023, 5:42 pm

I don’t think one gets a criminal record if they're not convicted of an actual crime. If it's determined that the guy wasn't aware what he was doing was wrong, I highly doubt he'd end up with a criminal record, unless perhaps he did something extremely invasive, in which case society needs to intervene and ensure that those behaviours stop.

I think it's generally reasonable to expect victims of behaviours of the socially naive to tell their unwitting perpetrators to stop doing what they're doing before resorting to law enforcement. If the guy refuses to stop, then he needs to be stopped, and subsequently educated on why what he's doing is wrong.



TwilightPrincess
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28 Sep 2023, 5:43 pm

It can be dangerous to approach or confront perpetrators. I would never do that.

Victims are under no obligation to behave a certain way or to follow specific protocol.


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Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 28 Sep 2023, 5:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

blitzkrieg
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28 Sep 2023, 5:45 pm

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
I don’t think one gets a criminal record if they're not convicted of an actual crime. If it's determined that the guy wasn't aware what he was doing was wrong, I highly doubt he'd end up with a criminal record, unless perhaps he did something extremely invasive, in which case society needs to intervene and ensure that those behaviours stop.

I think it's generally reasonable to expect victims of behaviours of the socially naive to tell their unwitting perpetrators to stop doing what they're doing before resorting to law enforcement. If the guy refuses to stop, then he needs to be stopped, and subsequently educated on why what he's doing is wrong.


There are different types of criminal record.

A particular police force logs and keeps records of people who are 'suspects' (not convicted) in regards to crimes or alleged crimes.

But those records don't show on criminal record checks, done by employers etc.

Only convictions show up because convictions prove a person has committed a crime, instead of simply being suspected of a crime.



bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 5:57 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
bee33 wrote:
If you're fine with an innocent person's disability being used to arrest them, paint them as criminals, go through the stress of being processed by the police, ruin their lives and possibly even cause them to do time in prison, then you are the problem.

You can disagree with me all that you want to, but I'm not changing my stance. Police and investigators are more capable of evaluating for extenuating circumstances than I am. My number one priority in such a scenario is my own safety. Even people with disabilities can pose a threat.

People can disagree, express opinions, and debate without anger or personal attacks. Victims of harassment or abuse should not have their opinions or perspectives regarding lived experience stifled by someone else. I have positive views of law enforcement in general and will seek their help whenever I deem it appropriate. You are free to have a different perspective.

Our posts were removed because they were off-topic. This isn't PPR. Let's try to get back on topic.
I don't have a problem with you expressing your points of view. I have a problem with you and Isabella rejecting the possibility that other people can have and express other views, and the two of you doing so forcefully and adamantly, and personally, and ganging up, as if someone else expressing a view is a personal affront to you. I already had to leave WP once because of you. It's looking like I may not be able to be here.



bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 5:59 pm

blitzkrieg wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
I don’t think one gets a criminal record if they're not convicted of an actual crime. If it's determined that the guy wasn't aware what he was doing was wrong, I highly doubt he'd end up with a criminal record, unless perhaps he did something extremely invasive, in which case society needs to intervene and ensure that those behaviours stop.

I think it's generally reasonable to expect victims of behaviours of the socially naive to tell their unwitting perpetrators to stop doing what they're doing before resorting to law enforcement. If the guy refuses to stop, then he needs to be stopped, and subsequently educated on why what he's doing is wrong.


There are different types of criminal record.

A particular police force logs and keeps records of people who are 'suspects' (not convicted) in regards to crimes or alleged crimes.

But those records don't show on criminal record checks, done by employers etc.

Only convictions show up because convictions prove a person has committed a crime, instead of simply being suspected of a crime.
In the US your arrest record is permanent, even if the charges against you are dismissed.



blitzkrieg
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28 Sep 2023, 6:02 pm

bee33 wrote:
blitzkrieg wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
I don’t think one gets a criminal record if they're not convicted of an actual crime. If it's determined that the guy wasn't aware what he was doing was wrong, I highly doubt he'd end up with a criminal record, unless perhaps he did something extremely invasive, in which case society needs to intervene and ensure that those behaviours stop.

I think it's generally reasonable to expect victims of behaviours of the socially naive to tell their unwitting perpetrators to stop doing what they're doing before resorting to law enforcement. If the guy refuses to stop, then he needs to be stopped, and subsequently educated on why what he's doing is wrong.


There are different types of criminal record.

A particular police force logs and keeps records of people who are 'suspects' (not convicted) in regards to crimes or alleged crimes.

But those records don't show on criminal record checks, done by employers etc.

Only convictions show up because convictions prove a person has committed a crime, instead of simply being suspected of a crime.
In the US your arrest record is permanent, even if the charges against you are dismissed.


I'm not sure if arrests show up on a criminal records check in the UK. I was referring to the type of crime that one doesn't get arrested for, but perhaps a person might be questioned about or when a person might be a suspect of a crime, despite there being no evidence, let us say, if one person alleges to the police that another person has committed a crime, the allegation which may or may not be true.



TwilightPrincess
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28 Sep 2023, 6:04 pm

bee33 wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:
bee33 wrote:
If you're fine with an innocent person's disability being used to arrest them, paint them as criminals, go through the stress of being processed by the police, ruin their lives and possibly even cause them to do time in prison, then you are the problem.

You can disagree with me all that you want to, but I'm not changing my stance. Police and investigators are more capable of evaluating for extenuating circumstances than I am. My number one priority in such a scenario is my own safety. Even people with disabilities can pose a threat.

People can disagree, express opinions, and debate without anger or personal attacks. Victims of harassment or abuse should not have their opinions or perspectives regarding lived experience stifled by someone else. I have positive views of law enforcement in general and will seek their help whenever I deem it appropriate. You are free to have a different perspective.

Our posts were removed because they were off-topic. This isn't PPR. Let's try to get back on topic.
I don't have a problem with you expressing your points of view. I have a problem with you and Isabella rejecting the possibility that other people can have and express other views, and the two of you doing so forcefully and adamantly, and personally, and ganging up, as if someone else expressing a view is a personal affront to you. I already had to leave WP once because of you. It's looking like I may not be able to be here.


Expressing an opinion is not attacking your point of view. Isabella and I have not engaged in personal attacks or made claims that others were living in a "fantasy land" unlike some posters.

In the past and present, you seem to think that when people disagree with you it's a personal attack. It's not. It's just a difference of opinion. I have no problems with you whatsoever. I don't hold grudges against people I disagree with unless they engage in truly reprehensible behavior. Of course, on the rare occasions when that happens, the person is always given a permanent vacation.

If you think I'm breaking the rules in some way in my posts, though, you are free to report them or talk to a mod about it.


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SkinnyElephant
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28 Sep 2023, 6:52 pm

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
I don’t think one gets a criminal record if they're not convicted of an actual crime. If it's determined that the guy wasn't aware what he was doing was wrong, I highly doubt he'd end up with a criminal record, unless perhaps he did something extremely invasive, in which case society needs to intervene and ensure that those behaviours stop.

I think it's generally reasonable to expect victims of behaviours of the socially naive to tell their unwitting perpetrators to stop doing what they're doing before resorting to law enforcement. If the guy refuses to stop, then he needs to be stopped, and subsequently educated on why what he's doing is wrong.


The one time a woman threatened to press charges, here's how it went down: I really wanted to know what I did to make her lose interest in me (and I wouldn't let the topic go). I wasn't aware I was "harassing" her. I simply viewed myself as a guy who really wanted to know what he did to make her lose interest, so I'd know how to alter my behavior with women I pursue in the future.

After some back and forth, she said "Just stop texting me already." I replied along the lines of "Just tell me what I did to make you lose interest. Then I promise you'll never hear from me again." She then replied telling me to seriously stop or else she'll press charges.

So I stopped (only because I didn't want charges). I then exercised a revenge strategy I outlined on a prior post (and made sure to pick a strategy where she'd have no 100% evidence I did it).

Had she simply told me what I did to make her lose interest, the revenge strategy never would have happened.



IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 6:57 pm

bee33 wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:

If I experienced any backlash, I know how to contact the police. Being on the spectrum is NOT an excuse for creepy, abusive behavior, and I will NOT tolerate it from anyone. I'm done with accepting excuses for abuse and tolerating it. Investigators can determine if any extenuating circumstances should be taken into consideration. That's not my job or responsibility. Ensuring my personal safety, on the other hand, IS my responsibility.

If someone is actually abusing or stalking you, then you are right to take any steps you can to protect yourself.

But you are dogmatically refusing to acknowledge that people with intellectual disabilities can be wrongly accused (meaning that they are completely innocent, and therefore don't meet your standards for someone you don't give a s**t about), and it can have very severe repercussions for them. This is not a hypothetical, it's something that has actually happened.

If you're fine with an innocent person's disability being used to arrest them, paint them as criminals, go through the stress of being processed by the police, ruin their lives and possibly even cause them to do time in prison, then you are the problem.

As an aside, given that our previous posts were deleted, let me be clear: I am very angry with you and with Isabella. I do not forgive you for the awful things that you said.


WTF

Get a life babe


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bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 7:00 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:

Expressing an opinion is not attacking your point of view. Isabella and I have not engaged in personal attacks or made claims that others were living in a "fantasy land" unlike some posters.

In the past and present, you seem to think that when people disagree with you it's a personal attack. It's not. It's just a difference of opinion. I have no problems with you whatsoever. I don't hold grudges against people I disagree with unless they engage in truly reprehensible behavior. Of course, on the rare occasions when that happens, the person is always given a permanent vacation.

If you think I'm breaking the rules in some way in my posts, though, you are free to report them or talk to a mod about it.
I think you are choosing not to listen. You and Isabella gang up on people as a duo and are adamant that it's your way or the highway and don't someone dare disagree. That is the problem. Not your actual views and opinions.

The fantasy land comment was not an insult. I was not implying that you are fantasizing, I was saying that a place in which police are nice is a fantasy land, but perhaps it's one that actually exists where you are living, I don't know. It could also be just your rosy-colored perception of the police. But in either way it's not an insult. And it's another example in which people have to say and see things your way or else.

I don't know if you are violating any rules, but it's not nice and it's quite unpleasant to deal with.



bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 7:01 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
bee33 wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:

If I experienced any backlash, I know how to contact the police. Being on the spectrum is NOT an excuse for creepy, abusive behavior, and I will NOT tolerate it from anyone. I'm done with accepting excuses for abuse and tolerating it. Investigators can determine if any extenuating circumstances should be taken into consideration. That's not my job or responsibility. Ensuring my personal safety, on the other hand, IS my responsibility.

If someone is actually abusing or stalking you, then you are right to take any steps you can to protect yourself.

But you are dogmatically refusing to acknowledge that people with intellectual disabilities can be wrongly accused (meaning that they are completely innocent, and therefore don't meet your standards for someone you don't give a s**t about), and it can have very severe repercussions for them. This is not a hypothetical, it's something that has actually happened.

If you're fine with an innocent person's disability being used to arrest them, paint them as criminals, go through the stress of being processed by the police, ruin their lives and possibly even cause them to do time in prison, then you are the problem.

As an aside, given that our previous posts were deleted, let me be clear: I am very angry with you and with Isabella. I do not forgive you for the awful things that you said.


WTF

Get a life babe
Thank you for showing your true colors.



TwilightPrincess
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28 Sep 2023, 7:08 pm

bee33 wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:

Expressing an opinion is not attacking your point of view. Isabella and I have not engaged in personal attacks or made claims that others were living in a "fantasy land" unlike some posters.

In the past and present, you seem to think that when people disagree with you it's a personal attack. It's not. It's just a difference of opinion. I have no problems with you whatsoever. I don't hold grudges against people I disagree with unless they engage in truly reprehensible behavior. Of course, on the rare occasions when that happens, the person is always given a permanent vacation.

If you think I'm breaking the rules in some way in my posts, though, you are free to report them or talk to a mod about it.
I think you are choosing not to listen. You and Isabella gang up on people as a duo and are adamant that it's your way or the highway and don't someone dare disagree. That is the problem. Not your actual views and opinions.

The fantasy land comment was not an insult. I was not implying that you are fantasizing, I was saying that a place in which police are nice is a fantasy land, but perhaps it's one that actually exists where you are living, I don't know. It could also be just your rosy-colored perception of the police. But in either way it's not an insult. And it's another example in which people have to say and see things your way or else.

I don't know if you are violating any rules, but it's not nice and it's quite unpleasant to deal with.

I see no problems other than a few personal attacks and being off-topic in this thread.

I've never received any warnings, at least not that I can recall, and I've never been temporarily banned.

I do not have a rose-colored view of the police. I have a realistic view of them. I said that I've had positive and negative experiences but that in general I think they do much more good than otherwise.

I never said that it had to be my way or the highway. You seem to have a problem with my personal position/stance. I have listened although no one is obligated to read or respond to every post (or any post) on WP. I think it bothers you that my stance won't change. Once again, it's okay for people to have different opinions.


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Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 28 Sep 2023, 7:27 pm, edited 4 times in total.

IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 7:09 pm

My true colours are that I don’t appreciate personal attacks. I didn’t say anything against you last night but just answered your questions and stated my POV. It was not all related to DV as you decided on your own. I did not gang up on you and you’ve already been told your comments are off topic.


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