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Wowbagger
Snowy Owl
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Joined: 25 Jun 2004
Age: 39
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Location: Pittsburgh

02 Sep 2004, 7:30 am

Just like to know what other aspies think of phones. I detest having to answer phones and the nature of conversation on them. A ringing phone is like a shrieking baby yelling for your immediate attention, compared to the unobtrusive arrival of mail. And I always "forget" to say things I want to say on the phone, because my mind feels overwhelmed by the need for continual creation of new verbal output. Almost every time I put down the phone after a conversation, I realise that I've neglected to ask or tell something important, but am so repulsed by the prospect of having to start another phone conversation that I often just let it go.

It seems the opposite for other people though. When I tell them I'd rather they contact me by email, they often end up not contacting me at all.



Nick_14
Butterfly
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02 Sep 2004, 9:59 am

I laughed when I read this!

I was so pleased to hear I'm not the only person who hates the phone! The guys at work think I'm weird because I refuse to correspond with people on the phone. The bank particularly like dealing with me when I demand an email. This has 2 plus sides since I get to think of the reply I send back to them and also I get to keep a record of exactly what was said.

I guess it's just one more thing I'm going to need to learn to deal with though since my job is fast approaching the day when I'll have to deal with customers via the phone.



todayiamhuman
Blue Jay
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Location: Bristol, UK

02 Sep 2004, 10:10 am

i feel the same, i dread important phone conversations because i will ALWAYS forget what to say, and i find i stutter and mumble even more when i am on the phone. if im lucky enough to have my friends or my mum next to me at the time, i usually get them to make the phonecall if it is to a college or bank or something.
friends tell me its pretty hard to understand me on the phone.
we are so lucky to have all this nonverbal communication like forums, messenger services and email. it truly is a lifesaver lol



Fiddler
Deinonychus
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Joined: 16 Jul 2004
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Location: Reims, France

02 Sep 2004, 10:36 am

I hate it too. I get very anxious when I have to make a phone call.
E.g: last june, a friend I haven't seen for a year called home but I was not home. She asked my parents to tell me to phone her back, and they did so. Well, I haven't found the courage to pick up the phone yet... :oops:
I don't like answering the phone either.
I can't concentrate on what my interlocutor say.
Moreover, I don't know when the other one has finished to explain his ideas, and I start to speak when he/she begins another sentence.
I also got problems to understand when a conversation is finished.



Kosh
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Location: Ann Arbor, MI

02 Sep 2004, 11:18 am

Oh my... I despise the phone. I've hated it since I was little. My mother would encourage me to call friends and it would be this Sisyphean task to even get me to pick up the phone. I have pretty extreme phone anxiety, and society's slow changes to allow more modes of communication often frustrates me. My loathing for the telephone knows no boundaries.



NoMore
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02 Sep 2004, 3:50 pm

I do not like using the phone. I let my husband make any necessary business calls. I MUCH prefer to write/email. I get nervous on the phone and don't know what to say.



hilarythebaker
Blue Jay
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Location: Texas, USA

02 Sep 2004, 9:51 pm

I am an Aspie who actually loves to talk on the phone....I love to talk period.

I don't particularly enjoy business calls... I prefer to handle business online. This for me consists of calling companies I order things from and having to discuss problems. I trade CDs and DVDs internationally and business is strictly online. I do not do overseas calls.



ilster
Deinonychus
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03 Sep 2004, 2:00 am

I have good days and bad days. I'm starting to understand my phone-a-phobia a bit better after reading this! I used to tell people that I don't ring them, because I hate intruding in their personal space (which is true) .... but I think it's probably more that I hate having to talk when I'm not in the mood and assume everyone else is the same. Email means I can wait till I have the right thoughts together, and off I go -ramble, ramble, ramble. And, as everyone else has pointed out, you can edit! I've said some terrible things on the phone.



magic
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Location: US; male, 34

03 Sep 2004, 2:09 am

I love to talk, but not on the phone. In my teens I had an acute "phonophobia", it sometimes took me weeks of "preparations" to make a single phone call (literally). Nowadays it is much easier, but I still feel anxiety and postpone calls if they relate to a new situation for which I am unable to develop a script in advance. Starting phone conversation is the worst part, after this obstacle the rest goes usually smoothly (though I have a habit of interrupting people sometimes). Receiving calls is not a problem for me, because my script is simple: "Hello!", and then it's the other person's task to carry the interaction. I'd like to add that I am very glad to meet other phonophobes! :D



V111
Deinonychus
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03 Sep 2004, 5:16 am

A ringing phone grrh a most useless sound i can not think of. The tech exists to make them more useful say a nice voice or very short recording done by the caller saying who is calling. Call it voice caller id that way you can tell if you want to pick it up :-)


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Scoots5012
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03 Sep 2004, 6:52 am

The phone is the one thing I hate the most. When I was little, I use to run off and hide when ever the phone rang. The phone always rings when I'm sleeping and it always wakes me up. I hate making calls on the phone too.


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Taineyah
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03 Sep 2004, 7:52 am

I like the phone, but only to talk to certain people. I like answering the phone, only because I hate the sound it makes if I let it ring. I prefer MSN!! !


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CockneyRebel
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03 Sep 2004, 8:43 am

I hate talking on the phone. I have to mentally prepare myself just to make an appointment with the dentist or the doctor. I hate having to phone for a taxi. I'm afraid that a bimbo who only understands one speech pattern is going to pick it up. I never answer the phone when it rings at my house. I let somebody else get it. I hate phones so much that if my dad leaves his cordless phone on the computer desk, I move it into the TV room with my thumb and my Index Finger. All that is due to all the Communication Barriers that I've experienced over the phone. And I'm not willing to lose my Accent, so they'd better find well trained office people to answer those phones. :!:



sparkplugloy
Deinonychus
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Location: South of France

03 Sep 2004, 8:50 am

I do not like talking on the phone because I do not know what to say and I often forget things to say. So I do not call people unless I must. I also do not like to have to call people back when they phone when I am not at home, and most of the time, I reply by an e-mail.
But I like to talk about my interests, so when I am called by someone to talk about something special, I like it.

Loy


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KtMcS
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03 Sep 2004, 3:13 pm

phonecalls are evil....bless the inventors of email and SMS!


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alex
Developer
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03 Sep 2004, 3:59 pm

I am not that bothered with telephones. I don't like answereing the phone, however. Does anyone else dislike answering machines?


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