If you don't like telling people you have AS, why not?

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The NTs think that the word "autistic" equates to "ret*d". It is hard to explain somebody you are NOT a ret*d, even if you tell them you have a high IQ, because they simply won´t believe you, and will think that if you are not a ret*d, then there must be the only "reasonable" explanation: you must be "crazy". And suddenly, you find yourself being branded "the ret*d nut" and things like that. They don´t won´t to hear lenghty opinions, they aven don´t wanna understand. They just want to be finished quickly with everything, brand somebody (because it is FAST), and leave it. And then call the person by the nickname they chose for the given Aspie. Ugh. Do you see the malice? It´s the NTs who are "nuts", not us.

It's mostly because I don't want to be treated differently from others. And I also don't want people to start saying all they know about some autism stereotypes they read about on the web.

Last edited by Kairi96 on 23 Nov 2012, 2:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Providing that information to others will trigger a series of followup questions from them for days and weeks thereafter. I keep it on a need to know basis for this reason.

Too many reasons:

I don't feel like a real aspie and I feel I have no right to tell people
There are people who are more effected by it than me so to say I have it would be a disservice to them
They may not believe I have it
They may start thinking I am using it as an excuse for whatever goes wrong
They may start treating me differently and start making assumptions acting like it all describes me
It's so embarrassing
They may think I am using it as an excuse when I tell them
I am not always sure if I am on the spectrum despite being diagnosed
They may use it against me
They may start making excuses for me
They may start treating me like a child
They may dumb down too much what they say acting like I am too stupid to know because I may not be smart enough to use my common sense or figure something out on my own without being told
They may start picking apart what I do and say or think it's because I have AS
They might assume I have the stereotypes of it
They might delude themselves thinking I have gotten worse ever since I have told them
I have just heard too many bad stories about the results of telling someone so I am terrified of that too

All of the above, but people don't generally believe me and they think I'm just making excuses to "get out of taking responsibility for my life", or to "get my way", proving how little they actually know me. Honestly, I wish I could do the things that everyone else takes for granted (managing living on their own without dependence on anyone for anything, driving, relationships, etc.), but it's not as easy for me as it is for them and they'll never understand that.

because you're basically saying 'i am socially awkward - that is me'. that's the actual defintion for it in wikipedia pretty much 'difficulties in social interaction' which is just professional speak forcially awkward. you'd be better off saying you have social anxiety disorder. i think aspergers syndrome was a fad. i could label about 15% of people i see as aspergers but what would be the point it's just a personality type that's getting abused - differences in people vary a lot but it's certainly not a disorder - their thinking abilities mean they'll complete any physically task basically vs the useless average people. aspie to me just means very logical person who thinks so much that they subconciously cannot notice and feel other people's states/emotions.

they're going to take aspergers off as a disorder like it should be. socially awkward and interested in physical things systems - that's not a disorder that's just variation in people. if everyone were interested in nothing and only were around other people like back in the tribes days... imagine that. aspergers won't clinically exist by the dsm 5 - including it's criteria aka those aspies are no longer considered disordered (and what a farce all those people that went along with it). i saw i had aspie like criteria but i never completed told myself i was molded exactly like that and always knew it certainly wasn't a 'disorder' as i use the word. and i still think that normal people are more of a problem than aspie people.

I don't want them to think I'm using it as an excuse.

I haven't told my best friend or even my siblings. I don't worry about what they would think of me as much as I am worried that they would tell other people. Then those other people would think I was weird, maybe not believe it and think I'm trying to get attention, maybe treat me differently- well, that's a good thing but I mean differently in a bad way.

Other: All of the above.

Right now, no one knows I'm an Aspie; they think I'm just "eccentric".

i got called eccentric by one form tutor in a report. if eccentric just means not looking or sounding or acting like anyone else and that's the only criteria ie just mere difference. then there's nothing wrong with it and it's shows a probably healthier mind. because it shows a mind that is able to independently think and be attracted to the way things look as they look or do things based on the nature of what is being done. whereas the people who copy... it's just that it's animalistic i do what others do i can't even begin to understand... probably based around fear of being different or more accurately having to think for themselves. if you're just different by oppositional thought ie you just try and do the polar opposite to everyone else with no more creativity than that then that's probably just as non thinking as the people do think i'm not sure...

I was going to say, you forgot to add "because they'll think I'm a liar" which is rapidly followed by "they'll think I'm lazy and/or just looking for attention" but Nekoguy beat me to it.

These are the main reasons.

1. Because people might only view me through the AS stereotypes that they know of
2. Because I get embarrassed
3. Because I don't like having a label
4. Because I feel I don't need to tell friends because I can hide it well enough and just come across as shy and anxious
5. Because I fear people looking upon me as ''abnormal''
6. Because I fear that it might embarrass the person I tell

That's true for number 6. I don't know why but I feel that if I suddenly tell a friend that I have this label, they might suddenly feel quite afraid of me, or might feel embarrassed. This most probably is not true at all, and I'm probably talking daft here, but it's what I really think.

Being an Aspie is nothing to be proud of, no need to go around broadcasting it

SO NOT TRUE!! !

Even Einstein or Mozart had Asperger features, and everybody is proud of them. They achieved great things! Bill Gates or Mark Zuckerberg are also said to be Aspies. And they are one of the richest and the most accomplished men in the world.

So I must disagree with you. Aspergers only makes your life a hell when it comes to handling interpersonal relationships.

For me because I lack the verbal ability to elaborate in an easy to relate way what it actually means and how it applies to me