Necessity or self-interest
For the past year, I have been a full-time student, having attended two different schools and two different majors.
But I am troubled. Part of me feels like I should do what I want to do, yet part of me feels pressured to do something I am not really interested in order to please others.
I feel that I am supposed to follow a certain career path, make a certain amount of money, etc. because I feel that someone, somewhere, is is judging me because I have not fulfilled some sort of amazing feat by a certain time period.
I don't know what to do.
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AnnaLemma
Deinonychus
Joined: 15 Mar 2008
Age: 74
Gender: Female
Posts: 384
Location: Holocene critter country
Over my life I have worked in some very diverse fields, and found that, for me, a really great paycheck doesn't make up for the misery of a job that I took for the wrong reasons. The best jobs grew into something completely unforeseen at the outset, but were always something interesting to me. Often, these were unconventional jobs that I cobbled together from my passions, that I was kind of laughed at for pursuing, but ultimately became more than just sustainable. I'm sorry to say that I didn't become sufficiently pressure-proof until my mid-30's and wish I'd been more confident earlier on. I hope you can learn to trust your instincts.
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The plural of "anecdote" is not "data".
But I am troubled. Part of me feels like I should do what I want to do, yet part of me feels pressured to do something I am not really interested in order to please others.
I feel that I am supposed to follow a certain career path, make a certain amount of money, etc. because I feel that someone, somewhere, is is judging me because I have not fulfilled some sort of amazing feat by a certain time period.
I don't know what to do.
Your only judge is yourself in this case. I can totally relate to what you're saying.
Don't choose between a healthy salary and something you love. Work at finding a way to merge something well-paying with something you love.
I spent a couple of years collecting a paycheck. It was a large paycheck, but I was unbelievably miserable. I worked for and around extremely mediocre, back-stabbing people. I am relatively much happier now and still collecting the same amount of money, (God willing, knock on wood, prayer for the right administration to get elected).
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"Blowing through the jasmine in my mind..."
100% true.
Plainly put, outside of death and taxes, you have the right as a human being to not have to do something that you don't want to do. But remember (I recall you expressing a wish to drop out of school, so I'm assuming that that is partly what this is about), that with a bachelor's degree, things will be a lot easier for you in the long run (especially, since I recall, you're a great student academically). You'll have more opportunities and a greater income, giving you a lot more freedom to do what you want in life. So basically my point is, it may be worth doing something you're not crazy about for the next one or two years, or it may not, but you owe it to yourself to weigh the cost.
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Un-ban Chever! Viva La Revolucion!
But I am troubled. Part of me feels like I should do what I want to do, yet part of me feels pressured to do something I am not really interested in order to please others.
I feel that I am supposed to follow a certain career path, make a certain amount of money, etc. because I feel that someone, somewhere, is is judging me because I have not fulfilled some sort of amazing feat by a certain time period.
I don't know what to do.
yeah but for the most part i feel obliged to do things...out of a logic that i need to do certain things to be able to take care of myself financially, things that "i should" be doing...even the sense of that responsibility doesn't worry me and i don't care about them but what i do care is when i talk to people and such i like saying i'm doing something that i'm suppose to be doing if i'm not i dislike it when people ask me those kinds of questions, i feel like a bum...im actaully afraid of getting a job...i know i need one and i will get one but i don't want to change myself for it...like if i have to wear a uniform or a dress code...fake hello's and such....though i'm doing what i'm suppose to it crushes my soul....makes me internally unhappy...yet when people ask questions i like saying that i'm doing something....and i too am consumed by time...like basic conventional things like, when i was set to graduate high school when i'm suppose to and what not, have a job starting this age, etc....and when they didn't work they ate me alive...but i suppose its no different than hiding your difficulties....it makes other people happy and it gives them this impression your doing great but its complete torture and then when you try to express your difficulty its harder for them to accept it...like parents and such go into a deep denial or don't believe you...one of the messiest spills ever...doing that really screwed me, put me 5 or so years behind of my timeline...you can just imagine what a pain in the ass that is....i'm sort of doing that now, but its mild where the classes i'm taking are of interested topics except for one requirement >.< but yeah i do wonder how long i can handle before i crash again...but now that i'm aware of certain things i wasn't back then i hope i can make it through the year...
Why not try to please yourself? Forget about other people for once, and think about how much better off you'll be with a degree and the increased opportunities for careers and greater incomes.
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Un-ban Chever! Viva La Revolucion!
Trying to please myself will mean only attracting socially conservative people. That's what I am worried about.
Also, I had many reasons for changing my major to geography/urban planning. As many people know on here, my original major was geology.
1. I couldn't handle the stress of calculus, chemistry, and physics, and one of the geology professors was incompetent.
2. The majority of geologists work for the oil companies, which can be a rather volatile industry.
3. The city with the most jobs in the geology field is Houston. While Houston is becoming liberal (but still behind Austin in terms of cities in Texas), it's just too much of a liability to live there, as we all found out this past weekend with Hurricane Ike.
4. My parents thought I should be in a career field based on things I was interested in when I was about 5 years old, and expect college to cost next to nothing.
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I enjoyed being a GIS technician. Sure it only paid $11-13 an hour, but I was happy doing it. Yet I feel that potential romantic partners will only date guys who make at least $50,000 a year and who have college degrees.
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Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!
Now proficient in ChatGPT!
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