Lost

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I've got no idea of where to go or what I want to do.
I'm broke and unemployed, living off of what I'm getting off unemployment, which is rapidly ending.

I was on disability before, and I might be able to fall back on it, though I don't know if I'd be able to find lodging inexpensively enough to get by on it while living somewhere besides my parent's house.

Right now, I'm living in the city since I supposedly have friends here, and there are supposedly jobs here, but I haven't been able to find a job in my field (and I've got a Master's). The friends also don't let me hang out with them very often, so I tend to end up alone 5 days of the week, even though I don't want to.

My brain capacity is also severely limited due to a year of sleep deprivation and overstress that I experienced last year. My general health is also pretty poor, and the insomnia is continuing, even though I'm (finally) in a quiet environment.


I could stay where I am, but it costs a lot to be here, and I'm not exactly happy, as I hate the city. If I move, it'll be to a place where I don't have any friends at all, and loneliness is the single largest driving force in my life.

If I go back to my parent's house, I'll save a lot of money, and might be able to get by longer if I have to go back on disability (I can afford my current place on unemployment, but disability is far too low). They do live in a nice town, but I don't know anyone there anymore. The only friends I had left, and my brother died, leaving the town empty to me.


I feel like crap, feel like I have nowhere to go.

Most days, I find myself simply wishing that the day were over on the chance I might feel good enough to actually do something the next.

It seems like a difficult situation. From what you've said, you do need some kind of change. You could risk moving to another place or else return to stay at your parents' for now. With the former, it might be worth a try if you have some things set up in advance (e.g., work, a social club based on an interest, some volunteer work) and also a time frame within which to give it a chance to see if it works out.

It's advisable to figure out the finances in detail before you make any decisions. Learn how many benefits you are entitled to first and the cost of lodgings in the various areas you are considering. That should make decision-making easier because you'll have something tangible on which to base it. You could also consider temporarily working outside the field in which you're qualified or something related to it (e.g., tutoring). Anyway, it's probably a good idea to spend your energy gathering information for now, rather than on making a decision. I wish you well.