Why do I get so angry when I see people ignoring the rules?

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I don't get angry very easily but seeing people breaking the law (speeding, teenagers drinking) and the rules (skipping queues, not picking up their dog's faeces) makes me very angry for some reason. Does their intuition tell them it is acceptable? Do some people feel the law doesn't apply to them?

I totally agree-I tread lightly and take care to obey the rules and others flaunt the fact that they don't follow the rules and think there is nothing wrong doing it.

I agree, but at the same time, it's not like any of us has never broken rules before. I only really react if it's something major.

I think it's because many people with AS get their sense of security, in what to them is a chaotic world, from following the rules. Therefore not following them is a much bigger deal. Seeing others not following them messes with that security.

I am completely obsessed by rules. I have rules for everything. I'm not sure if it's what keeps me sane or what keeps me insane.

That is true. I only really get annoyed when the person is putting someone else at risk or inconveniencing them. I feel like Larry David sometimes but of course I don't share my irritation with everyone.

I used to react very strongly to any rule-breaking. I've mellowed out somewhat, because I've learned that there are multiple sets of rules, not just one, and they all interact in such a way that no one of them can be perfectly followed. There's a rule that you shouldn't speed; there's also a rule that you shouldn't be late to work; there's yet another rule that you should only be hostile to people who speed under certain circumstances; yet another rule that your action should be the one that results in greater safety, and that means saying nothing if it would just goad the speeder to go faster...

Sets of rules are very alluring in their simplicity, but unfortunately they interact only imperfectly with the everyday world.

I've been told that keeping a strict eye on the rules is an Asperger's trait, usually getting angry or thrown off if someone you see breaks a rule - like, it really gets your attention.

In my case, I can be a rule-breaker, so it doesn't anger me, but I instantly catch it if someone breaks the rules. It throws everything else away and my attention diverts right to them.

I'm not the biggest fan of speeders, though.

I'm far more interested in whether what someone is doing is ethical rather than whether it breaks the rules. Absolute rules usually irritate me a good deal, because they don't account for all situations.

They just don't care or are willing to accept the consequences when caught. Plus I think some people are just too lazy to pick up their dog poop.

There have been some minor things I have broken like crossing the street when there is a red light but there were no cars coming or running across the street when the thing said don't walk but there were no cars coming. It's not that I don't think the rules don't apply, I just get bored with waiting or am impatient. if I see a bus or train coming, I try and beat it so I won't have to make the next one. But it sucks if traffic is in the way so therefore I can't try and make it.

Rule breaking bothers me because it's a broken promise. I hate broken promises! A new restaurant opened on campus and it got me upset twice: first because the campus newspaper and the city newspaper both promised that they would have the same menu as their main restaurant across town. But when I went there, they don't have fresh carrot juice or fresh orange juice or about five other things from the menu at the other restaurant so I felt lied to and extra upset because I had been looking forward to that carrot juice for a week so it was a broken promise, too.

Then I tried to buy something else and they said they don't accept the campus food card. They are in the middle of the campus food court! Everyone on campus accepts the food card, even the Starbucks that is on campus. I put my lunch budget for the semester on my food card so that meant I can't eat there at all and I was excited about them coming for three months because I can't eat most of the food on campus but finally there was going to be something I could eat! So I put a lot of money on my food card so I could eat there. And now the money will just sit on my card because they don't take the card and I will be packing my lunch because there's nothing else to eat. So I felt lied to again and I felt like the promise of the campus food card was broken. And I'm very upset, especially because the days I have to bring my own lunch I'm already carrying about 15 pounds of books so it's a big inconvenience to me.

It may sound like what I'm talking about has nothing to do with rule breakers, but it's the same thing to me and the same feeling. If someone doesn't use their turn signal and I miss my chance to go because they didn't say they would be turning, I get angry because we all promise to follow the rules when we drive and they didn't follow the rules so they broke a promise and in a way they lied to me by not saying they were going to turn (or people who use their turn signal when they're not turning and almost cause an accident!) and I get very angry about being lied to or having promises broken. The social contract that says that we will pick up dog poop and follow laws is, to me, as much a promise as the newspaper saying the full menu will be available at a new restaurant.

The ones that get me are
-Going in through a door that says "out" and vice versa
-Cutting in lines
-Lines that arent clearly defined (getting on a city bus)
-Not flushing a public toilet
-Traffic laws especially
-bringing a cartload of items to a "10 or less" checkout
-parents who dont watch their chidren and allow them free run of a store
-when a sign on a restroom door says "OUT OF ORDER", and they ask me what the problem is and can they use it anyway
-haggling with a cashier in a convenience store (where i work)
-CLOSED MEANS CLOSED!
-21 MEANS 21!! !


man people piss me off.

I dont have a car but it still irritates me when people block my driveway

i am really fussy about that. i am known as a whistleblower at workplaces. it is not a good thing, and it doesn't get me very far.

Because you don't think it's fair that they should get away with it when you feel quite certain that if you broke them, you wouldn't.

I'm realizing that I am stringent about rules and I like rules. When I observe someone breaking a rule or being lax, I am vigilent in awareness. Maybe because I am so conscientious myself and I really do not understand, at all, how another can just not care.

Fairly recently I read a news story about a lady convicted of animal cruelty and I felt sick - physically sick. I wanted her punished. I wanted to understand that is wrong! I have no concept of how one can violate in this way - how dare they.

I think I am harsh on trangressions, to an extent. I am a very ethical being, by nature. I hate that another is not accountable.

In middle school once I remember there were several kids nearby, smoking cigarettes behind the school bus area. Usually I'd never speak! But I told them they were being bad and smoking is unhealthful and against the rules. Because I meant it. They teased me.....told me I was prissy and they'd beat me up. But they are still wrong.

Me too. Once (fairly recently), when I was a TA (teaching chem lab) someone (an unknown) accidentally left a lab oil and wax heating unit on overnight and the wax had burnt, with the element burnt out. I was not "upset" and I understand it was an oversight - albeit dangerous! Easily could have started a fire. I immediately told the lab safey officer and she acted as if she did not care. I was nonplussed and her casual-ness. I had unplugged the broken unit (pricey!), of course, and cleaned up the smoky mess. She (the lab officer) said she'd "mention to the other TA" who left the unit on since it's their job to make certain all is well in the lab before we leave for the night, amongst other duties. Geez. The safety officer did not even care to look and did not even get out of her chair to enquire.

yep - i would have done the same thing!

never mind trying to get my past employers to follow labour laws etc. i even tried to start a union.

one employer capitalized on my need to be a whistleblower by creating a special job just for me - auditing cash register journal tapes for irregularities. but then i would get annoyed when people wouldn't get into trouble about the irregularities i found!