| Author |
Message |
Forum: Love and Dating Topic: How to avoid Dating a Narcissist |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 01 Oct 2022, 7:24 am
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Replies: 159
Views: 21,624
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| I've never been with a narcissistic guy, because I've never said "Yes" to a romantic relationship. Purely platonic acquaintances, mostly work related. I made that clear from the beginning. But unfortunately a lot of guys with big Egos couldn't accept my "No" and started treating ... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Do us autistics attract predators? |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 30 Sep 2022, 2:09 pm
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Replies: 20
Views: 1,792
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| These are the right questions, I'm also asking myself currently. My alert sound was ringing very early, but I ignored it. Why didn't I trust myself? its very difficult to overcome the behavior which other people put in you from the childhood. My father was an Aspie like me, but unfortunately I grow ... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Where Is The Best Place To Find A Girlfriend? |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 09 Sep 2022, 8:00 am
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Replies: 25
Views: 1,771
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| 3 girlfriends on forum? Okay! If you are looking for one girlfriend each week, you could be successful with dating-apps and so on. If you are looking for a longer serious partnership, better don't try it online. |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Where is the worst place to find a partner? |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 09 Sep 2022, 7:52 am
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Replies: 156
Views: 5,079
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| I would say, the worst place to meet a partner (kind of soulmate) is on every kind of party. Because there the NT's usually just look for some partner for one night (or few weeks). |
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Forum: Work and finding a Job Topic: Flea market or arts festival |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 09 Sep 2022, 7:33 am
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Replies: 3
Views: 652
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| I think you can make more money at an art festival, if you want to sell your own art. You can also sell there for a higher price than at a flea market. At a flea market people are looking for cheap bargains, at an art festival people are looking for art (handmade unique pieces) for a good price, but... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Is it an autism thing to not like traveling? |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 09 Sep 2022, 7:01 am
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Replies: 33
Views: 1,672
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| I'm already traveling through Europe for 3 years now, but independently. I hate the common kind of traveling, too. But with my tiny Camper, I can travel with my conditions and move my home to another country. This is a good way to live. If I don't feel well anymore with the people on a place and get... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I have no one to talk to about my problems |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 30 Jul 2022, 9:44 am
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Replies: 23
Views: 1,269
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| Of course it's a lonely journey. And maybe all life (until death). I spend my life without family and friends, only dogs. Sometimes it's unbearable to watch and hear other people discussing their griefs, worries and problems with each other. I always ask myself: "Why I don't get this chance, to... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: So tired of people making assumptions about me |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 30 Jul 2022, 9:31 am
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Replies: 3
Views: 260
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| The old problem with NT's! The are so social as well as busy. No time to ask honestly: "How are you? Why you behave like this? How can I help you to feel better?" It's not so complicated to say this, or? But it's easier for them, just to think the own stuff about you and your behavior - an... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Looking for contacts in Europe |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 30 Jul 2022, 9:16 am
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Replies: 1
Views: 133
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| There are plenty of meetings and events in the USA and UK, where autistic people can get together. Only in Europe there seems to be no contact points of this kind. Or have I not found them yet? Does anyone know where a gathering is taking place in europe? Since I have no opportunity to travel to the... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: narcissist people and being used |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 24 Jul 2022, 5:57 am
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Replies: 4
Views: 643
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| Tthanks for the book tip. I've struggled with these situations my whole life. Unfortunately, my mother was a real borderline personality, so from an early age I was manipulated into only caring about others and feeling bad and guilty, if I wanted to do something good for myself instead of being cons... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Masking well until you have a meltdown |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 24 Jul 2022, 5:36 am
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Replies: 64
Views: 2,515
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| I have already done a DBT. It is comparable to a CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). You explore emotions and learn different types of skills and strategies to deal with your emotions more easily. But it's not the best idea to join group therapy for that. Especially when the therapist misdiagnoses y... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Masking well until you have a meltdown |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 15 Jul 2022, 9:37 am
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Replies: 64
Views: 2,515
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| It's really unfair. People seem to care about NTs' feelings but not ours. Advice is given to always reach out for help, but when I do so, people either say 'you think you've got it bad, well I've got it worse.' Or just stare blankly, not understanding. It's confusing and weird. EXACTLY! People are i... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Masking well until you have a meltdown |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 15 Jul 2022, 9:30 am
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Replies: 64
Views: 2,515
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| It's really unfair. People seem to care about NTs' feelings but not ours. Advice is given to always reach out for help, but when I do so, people either say 'you think you've got it bad, well I've got it worse.' Or just stare blankly, not understanding. It's confusing and weird. EXACTLY! People are ... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: My new knowledge about my mental health |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 15 Jul 2022, 8:54 am
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Replies: 17
Views: 1,108
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| I think the problem lies in the contradictions. They smile and say everything is fine and you should instinctively guess, that was a lie and just a social smile, i.e. a fake smile. And they get offended or make fun of you, when you don't understand their two meanings. I'm not slow-witted! I just lik... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Masking well until you have a meltdown |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 15 Jul 2022, 6:48 am
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Replies: 64
Views: 2,515
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| Unfortunately, it looks like this heartless behavior of NT's is everywhere. I'm travelling through Europe and observe it in every country. The society of NT's is getting too much for me and I need a break to fill up my energy, but nobody respect it, means, it's not allowed to leave the dinner table ... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Question about my social skills |
| Nic na Mara |
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Posted: 15 Jul 2022, 6:02 am
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Replies: 8
Views: 644
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| Because of my ASD, I was often in the same situation like you. The people lie to me and exploited me and after all, I'm the fool. I studied the strange social behavior of NT's, in order to avoid this situations. I could learn a lot from Paul Ekman's book "Emotions revealed". I don't listen... |
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