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Message |
Forum: The Haven Topic: Feeling a sense of negative foreboding over family issues |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2015, 7:24 pm
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Replies: 1
Views: 310
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| Indeed, life is an uphill battle and your family drama is steeped in many layers. However, your family moving to your "last bastion" really isn't an issue. Seattle is an entire city, there's bound to be plenty of areas you can breathe easy and find yourself contented. The hurdle here is en... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Delayed reactions |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2015, 7:16 pm
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Replies: 5
Views: 370
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| Sounds to me like you've become numbed to an emotion you're having too often. Either that, or it's like you said; you're still in shock. Take it piece by piece and try to relax. |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I can Feel Myself Changing |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 04 Jan 2015, 2:36 pm
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Replies: 1
Views: 348
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| It just sounds like you're starting to dig into a more self-reflective nature. Questioning yourself is a part of obtaining greater understanding. You shouldn't be worried, you've just got some internal struggle that your mind needs to start solving or accepting. Perhaps doing these things you don't ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Pitfalls of being nice? |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 04 Jan 2015, 2:27 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 685
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| Being nice or passive isn't a bad thing. It's their usage in particular situations that could be seen as suboptimal. Judging each situation with one's comfort level regarding it is required to create the appropriate response. It takes a lot of trial and error, but given enough social experiences, on... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: upon reflection, I was being mean |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 04 Jan 2015, 2:13 pm
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Replies: 15
Views: 2,000
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| I'm glad your epiphany has given you a stronger grasp on reality. May your journey through this experience continue to sail upon the winds of your new found knowledge. |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I need somebody to talk to. I am losing it. |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 04 Jan 2015, 1:54 pm
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Replies: 8
Views: 948
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| Nah, you're as eloquent as an elephant enjoying an exciting experience in Europe. Your writing skills are impressive, so you gotta own up to that. I don't believe that you have zero imagination, surely there must be something in there that you drift off into. You need to seek that out by reflecting ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I dream of being numb |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 01 Jan 2015, 10:33 am
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Replies: 10
Views: 501
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| It's tough not to consume myself with self-penance when the present isn't good and the future just isn't there. All I can look at in this case is the past and just keep smashing myself over the head with it. I appreciate your replies, thank you. It's nice having someone to talk to. |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I dream of being numb |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 31 Dec 2014, 7:40 pm
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Replies: 10
Views: 501
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| I don't know how to reply, but your words seem so poignant that I feel compelled to try. I know that when I look around me I don't see much reason for hope or optimism, but being pragmatic, I have the essential basic human needs guaranteed; and I can compare that with past experiences and know that... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I dream of being numb |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 31 Dec 2014, 3:39 pm
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Replies: 10
Views: 501
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| Still lonely. Still empty. Wished I had lived. Not sure how that would have gone. I don't think I'm designed to experience life. I have nothing to talk about to anyone. Everything lacks substance. Everything is grey. This isn't so much a cry for help as it is a whimper. I'm still not numb enough. I ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I feel like I'm dying. This is the end. |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 24 Dec 2014, 3:06 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 1,356
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| I'm 27 now and I still don't have a life. I won't have a life in the foreseeable future. It sucks, but suicide takes effort. I don't feel like putting in that much work. Plus, what's the point? This silly existence is temporary, might as well enjoy whatever I can while I'm still suffering with the r... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Am I just doomed to a life of mediocrity? |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 24 Dec 2014, 1:02 pm
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Replies: 5
Views: 1,105
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| Of course life is a giant joke. Why aren't you laughing? It's hilarious. Find your purpose and you'll find contentment. Maybe that won't make you happy, but that state of mind is ephemeral. It's a moment, and then it's gone. Find those moments or wallow. Lots of people like to wallow. Wallowing can ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Why does cutting feel so good? |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 04 Dec 2014, 5:25 am
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Replies: 12
Views: 632
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I still think about cutting. I did deep ones, left noticeable scarring. One of them is exceptionally larger than the other...that might have been my last one. I don't know if I'll ever do it again. It wouldn't seem proper, I'm too old for that stuff now.
Then again, desperation knows no bounds. |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I dream of being numb |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 30 Nov 2014, 12:44 pm
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Replies: 10
Views: 501
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| I recognise you & remember that you posted a poem in a thread I started. Do you post in the other WP forums? (I’m struggling with communication, please excuse my use of ‘I’, its simpler to refer to my experiences and I hope you can translate the meaning) I can understand the desire to be numb, ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I dream of being numb |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 27 Nov 2014, 9:52 am
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Replies: 10
Views: 501
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| Try as I might, I can't become numb. Maybe it's my obsessive compulsive nature. Even if I take medication for anxiety, it's like my mind actively counteracts whatever it's supposed to do by ramping up my intrusive thoughts and concerns. I took some trazodone yesterday and it didn't help. Made me sle... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: my life sucks!! |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 13 Oct 2014, 1:25 pm
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Replies: 0
Views: 567
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| Hey man, I get it. These minds of ours don't work so hot. We tend to create mountains out of molehills and it's not something we can control by ourselves with ease. You sound like someone in a well supported, cared-for position. You've got a family that keeps an eye on you, you've got a positive att... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: I am a delicata squash. |
| Decorequiem |
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Posted: 13 Oct 2014, 1:13 pm
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Replies: 13
Views: 2,203
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| Writing here is a holding place, one of those odd things I do to just keep from getting worse and worse and probably one of those things that people don't understand. No, I totally get it. It's self -medication. It's something to keep things together in one's own head. Creating a stronger sense of ... |
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