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Message |
Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: . |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 06 Feb 2013, 7:07 pm
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Replies: 87
Views: 7,164
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| I guess the bottom line is, like they would say at a 12 step group; You can only change yourself. No matter how bad they are, you can't make them different. Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. So, you say ... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: aceptng responsibility |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 06 Feb 2013, 5:56 pm
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Replies: 19
Views: 2,187
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| Reward him every time he "owns" something that went wrong. If he has siblings, praise and reward them for taking responsibility. |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: . |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 06 Feb 2013, 5:52 pm
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Replies: 87
Views: 7,164
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| I think I would move. Just up and leave. I don't think I could try to change them at this point. I wouldn't see any of them for at least a year, let them sink like a rock. If your daughter is a minor or functional adult, bring her. If not - go on your own. It probably sounds really irresponsible, bu... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: Low Frustration Tolerance & Rigidity of Thinking |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 28 Jan 2013, 2:49 pm
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Replies: 39
Views: 7,514
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| she uses small doses of caffeine with success. I don't see the harm in trying it. In the same vein, we've been allowing DS a cup of coffee in the morning - which, for him, amounts to about 1/4 cup of actual coffee what with the huge amount of milk and the sugar cube he adds. I can't really tell if ... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: implementing incentives |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 28 Jan 2013, 2:02 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 2,915
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| Sorry about the "back" to school.... We homeschool but started out in school, so it's how I think! It sounds like you have a great idea! The other thing you can try, is butting out...all the way out, and then let him get stuck a little. As it is now, he knows 100% that you step in. I think you may g... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: implementing incentives |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 28 Jan 2013, 1:16 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 2,915
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| Hi Aann - Is going back to school important to him? If so, I wouldn't implement removals unless he thinks it would be helpful. I would likely say.... If you want to go back to school, you will need to be able to manage there on your own. So far, I'm stepping in quite a bit, which won't work. How do ... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: implementing incentives |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 26 Jan 2013, 2:11 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 2,915
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| My son doesn't do well with losing stuff at all, only gaining works for him. That said, we do use losing privileges for actual naughty behavior which I rarely see. (For instance stealing would get a consequence). My son doesn't have strong self control and when engaged in a non preferred activity, r... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: he does.not.listen |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 24 Jan 2013, 8:00 pm
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Replies: 34
Views: 10,093
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| One small add.... When issuing directions, I always state what I want rather than what I don't. For example, instead of "get out of the mud" I would say, "feet on the footpath", instead of "don't run" I say "walking feet". I think that we may sound like blah blah blah blah blah MUD or blah blah blah... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: Griefing - videogame social harassment |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 23 Jan 2013, 8:45 pm
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Replies: 38
Views: 7,070
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| Hi Momsparky - Hope you've been well. Here's my take on the situation - In Minecraft, my son's stuff was getting ruined repeatedly. He now mostly builds alone. To the best of my knowledge, when you are playing with others, it's kind of about wrecking each others stuff. I may not understand it proper... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: "outing" a kid on facebook???? |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 01 Jan 2013, 12:43 pm
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Replies: 47
Views: 38,512
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| I personally google and search FB before hiring someone. However, I'm fairly certain that I get hits to their profile and other mentions of them specifically. I'm not familiar with getting hits from other people mentioning them, certainly not by first name only. I also know its easy to find someone ... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: "outing" a kid on facebook???? |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 31 Dec 2012, 2:36 pm
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Replies: 47
Views: 38,512
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| Btw - I don't put private info on Facebook, because I realize its not private. I'm just curious about this following for life other people mentioned in my posts theory. I do however reject the idea that my child's "condition" be private, because if it doesn't get named, people just say "what's wrong... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: "outing" a kid on facebook???? |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 31 Dec 2012, 2:27 pm
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Replies: 47
Views: 38,512
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| B ut why does it matter if bots have it or FB company has that information stored? Are people going to still see it who know you or your child? Some people may still remember what they see on a billboard and someone can still take a photo of it and keep forever. Every company that ever deals with y... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: my son... |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 31 Dec 2012, 2:18 pm
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Replies: 13
Views: 6,583
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| For us, positive reinforcement works best...for instance: You can play video games after you are ready for the day. We found "stop doing what you want to go do something you don't want" not at all effective. We always try to think from his perspective of "what's in it for me", what is the benefit at... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: What did you tell your kids about Newtown? |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 20 Dec 2012, 7:57 pm
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Replies: 18
Views: 5,873
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| Point out that many mass shooters have glasses, or dark hair, or are male - but nobody connects this to their actions. This has been my focus with my son - my analogy is usually hair color. There is another one that I used to hear on talk radio...50% of people who die in car accidents have eaten fr... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: "This is my house, my rules!" |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 20 Dec 2012, 2:15 pm
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Replies: 67
Views: 38,431
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| I have to say that I like explaining why I have a rule (for the most part) as I feel it's part of my job in prepping them for having their own place and responsibilities. That said.. after a couple of times, I pretty done. I find I am more willing to go in depth as they get older BUT less willing to... |
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Forum: Parents' Discussion Topic: This new Facebook meme scares the crap out of me |
| Kailuamom |
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Posted: 18 Dec 2012, 7:21 pm
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Replies: 79
Views: 11,163
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| My DH's cousin is borderline schizophrenic. She is able to work and has worked throughout the years. She also has a college degree in in Bio Chem. However, she has periods, sometimes a couple years, where she is unable to hold a job and most times will be hospitalized. Mostly this is when she stops... |
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